Nothing sexual please.And to top that he just got a new girlfriend, who may i add is used to dating guys like 6 years older than her!!
2007-02-14 13:40:32 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
As a dating coach, I always get this question:
How do I win back my ex.
The question gets even trickier when it is:
How do I win back my ex when he is already seeing someone else.
In most cases, I do not believe in going back. There is usually a very good reason for the breakup. You can be friends with your exes but jumping back into a bad relationship is very rarely a wise move.
Most of my clients initially do not want to hear this so:
That said, here is the answer to your question:
How do you get your ex back when he has a new girlfriend?
In most cases the key to winning your guy back is patience. Most women screw up their chances of getting back together with their guy by being too forward, clingy or by throwing a fit if he does not want to get immediately back together. He did not want to hear you complain, or see you sob your eyes out when he was dating you, why in the world would you think that this technique would work now?
Also, men find unavailable women desirable. Throwing yourself at him actually makes you less valuable in his eyes.
Why would he want to get back together with someone like that?
Instead, let him know that you would like to still be his friend. Do not bring up past issues or act bitter in any way. You must appear to be happy and enjoying your life. No needy pleas for him to come back.
He will be expecting you to either be angry or upset. Don't prove him right. Do the unexpected.
Be there as his friend and as a good listener when he and his new girlfriend inevitably argue. Lend a sympathetic ear. If she is just a rebound girlfriend he may begin to remember all the reasons why he dated you in the first place. Never speak badly of her to him, allow him to do that. You are just being really sweet and supportive.
Date someone else, if possible. I prefer the suggestion of being seen out with a male friend frequently, so that you are not leading some new guy on. Seeing another man interested in you may remind him that you are an attractive woman.
Actually develop yourself. Take the classes that you never had time to take, when you were dating. Take the extra time with your appearance that you forgot to do, as your relationship progressed. If you do not feel beautiful and seductive, why would he believe that you are and want you back?
For a really great demonstration of how to do this technique correctly, rent the movie French Kiss with Meg Ryan.
1)First they show exactly what not to do to get your guy back.
2) Then they show you how to approach him and the new girlfriend. This scene might actually work better overseas than in the states. They are more reserved. Here the new girlfriend might go for your throat. The point of this scene is not to go in with guns blazing. Be pleasant to the new girlfriend and wish them well.
3) Finally, there is a great scene where she goes to her ex to settle their relationship and divide up their stuff. He has dumped her for this French woman who he calls a goddess. Meg Ryan does not storm in like the scorned woman. She is classy about the whole thing and of course he is immediately enamored again.
Once a man realizes that you are perfectly ok without him, he begins to wonder if there is something valuable that he has lost.
Choose class over throwing yourself at him in a wild attempt to "win him back." Start moving on with your life and he will find himself scrambling to catch up.
2007-02-14 13:52:09 · answer #1 · answered by Bombshell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did he break up with you in the first place? If you don't want to sound desperate, don't ask him directly, but just find out with clues and maybe asking his friends or something. Then try to change what he didn't like about you. If you can't, then you will get over him someday, it's just that everyone's healing processes are different. It may take on person one day to get over someone, but another person five months. The healing process ends when you realize that this is the truth, and you accept the fact that you guys aren't together anymore.
2007-02-14 21:46:00 · answer #2 · answered by julia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,
Your ex-boyfriend (and I stress "ex" = former, not current)
has a free will and has made a choice to get a new
girlfriend.
Men don't like women to chase them; they like to chase
after women. Any attempts by you to try and get back
into a relationship won't work. He's made up his mind,
and you can't change his mind--only he can.
I suggest you move on and get over it and learn from
the experience and focus on meeting new men as there
are lots of them out there.
You don't want to be in a one-sided relationship where
you care more for him than he does for you. Since he
so quickly gravitated to a new relationship, apparently
his "love" for you was not as intense as your love for
him, if he loved you at all.
Some women try to make a man jealous, and other
forms of manipulation. Don't fall into such behaviors
which will only backfire on you.
Hold your head high, wipe your tears from your eyes,
don't mull about the house in the dumps, just get
moving and be amongst friends and do active things
to keep your mind off him.
- Ivy
2007-02-14 21:49:02 · answer #3 · answered by Ivy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time heals all wounds. Simply lay off the guy (a figure of speech...) for a while. He obviously needs some time away, and you probably do too. If this girl is used to dating guys, she probably has dated many. they'll break up, he'll realize the mistake. If, by then, you still love him, ask him to get back with you. Offer to cook for him...that always turns us on...Most guys love hot wings! (and if you put on one of those Hooters tank tops...just a suggestion...)
2007-02-14 21:43:37 · answer #4 · answered by CJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shake it off and focus on yourself for a while. There is someone out there who is just as anxious to meet someone like you as you are to get back together with a guy who apparently isn't interested in you any more.
Some of us have learned the hard way that you'll end up cutting your losses eventually....better for you that it's now rather than later. You can't make someone love you.
2007-02-14 21:45:01 · answer #5 · answered by momx3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
act like you dont care and move on and go get yourself a new man and he will probably come right after you, just make sure he still really wants you and is not just after you because he does not want anyone else to have you......there is nothing worse than being in a relationship where one of the people involved does not want to be there, that only makes for misery
2007-02-14 21:44:07 · answer #6 · answered by SuzyBelle04 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if you have ever heard the saying if you love something set it free, and if it doesn't come back it wasn't meant to be. but I have found from past experience that this usually is true. so maybe it was just not meant to be. just be patient and see what happens and maybe it will work out for you, but don't put your life on hold if it doesn't because there are many other guys out there. It would be his loss anyway as he obviously did not know what he had.good luck to you.
2007-02-14 21:51:21 · answer #7 · answered by spindizz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok you if you really like ask a guy (maby even his BFF ) then kiss that guy/or hug or something like that in front of you're old bf and he will get so jealous! and start like doing you're haire and put makup on every day and taking a shower be for school every day so one you pass him you will not only look good but smell good p.s bring a brush and perfume to school ex:after every class go to the bathroom and brush you're smell you're self if you smell good then you're fine if you smell bad then bring out the perfume p.s NEVER FORGET to bring deodorant because you do not wont him to smell you're b-o oh and wear like really cute Minne skirts and a push up bra i no they are annoying but if you want that guy follow every thing i have said! p.s e-mail me if this works! if you need anymore help e-mail me =)
2007-02-14 21:47:49 · answer #8 · answered by emmy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hes not married to her, why did you break up in the first place? Address that reason, if it was your fault fix it, if it was his fault forgive him, and then sabotage their relationship as much as possible. If it works good, if it doesnt then you have nothing to lose. I would put lots of tight fitting condoms in her bag to make it look like she thinks your boyfriend is really small. He wont like that and will leave her
2007-02-14 21:44:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to forget about him. If you chase him or beg, he won't be interested in coming back at all. Just stay friends with him if you can, but don't act interested.
You should find a new guy
2007-02-14 21:43:31 · answer #10 · answered by Mrs. Eric Cartman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋