My BF and I split after 5 yrs. I have decided that it is best that I don't see him anymore (well for a few weeks anyway). We were talking on the phone as our split was not nasty, it hurts like hell dont get me wrong. Everytime I see him and he leaves, it hurts so much. I have decided for ME that I cant do that anymore. I want to talk to him on the phone, but not see him in person. We were talking lastnight and it was friendly, then I told him and his attitude changed. I think I hurt his feelings.
He is comming over tongiht to exchange some stuff and talk. How can I tell him that I am doing this for me without hurting his feelings. I really don't want to do this, but I do need to. Its for the best (I think).
Any advise?
2007-02-14 11:35:01 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Unfortunately, you'll get nowhere if you worry too much about his feelings. Your feelings are more important, it's ok to be selfish sometimes. In the end, you have to worry about what you're feeling and watch out for yourself. As long as your honest about your reasons, and not hurtful (no insulting or name calling) then that's pretty much can do.
Here:
http://www.yourromanceguide.com/tips/break-up/dont-delay.php
http://www.askmen.com/dating/heidi_100/112_dating_girl.html
2007-02-14 11:46:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should just sit down with him face to face. Emotions are so much better in person. You two will know how one another feels. Communication is everything. If he can't understand why you are doing this for you, then he wasn't meant to be with in the first place. If he loves you, he would wait forever or let you go untill you need your time. If you think it's for the best, just sit him down and explain how you feel. Avoid arguing or fighting. If it comes down to it, then just tell him he needs to leave before you both say something or do something you regret. Good luck!
2007-02-14 19:43:13 · answer #2 · answered by ~M*a*N*d*Y~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As relationships come and go, there is never an easy way to breakup without anyone getting hurt. What I would suggest is that, you seek inside yourself and ascertain what went wrong or what caused the split. Aterwards, just be honest and open. Pain will come but not by intenionally being inflicted.
2007-02-14 19:44:29 · answer #3 · answered by jaymzzach 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u guys have split.. it does hurt i know that.. my split up was not nasty too.. think that's why is hurts so much.. anyways... my advice is that there isn't much to worry about his feelings now nor urs, cause u guys are back to individuals.. just do what u need to do to get ur life back to 'normality' .. if the split is mutual then let it be, but there is always chance that u guys have another chance.. simply perhaps either because u guys still have too much emotional bond or one simply think he or she cannot fall in love again or there isn't anyone that one might think can fall in love with..
god bless
2007-02-14 19:44:28 · answer #4 · answered by Philip L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop right there....don't worry about his feelings, if he doesnt care enough about you to realize that its not just about him, and realize that its too hard for you to see him right now, then oh well. Are you guys still intimate? if so, that could be part of why it upsets him. Just explain to him that it hurts you to see him right now and that you need a break. If he gets upset, then ask him why it upsets him. Then ask, why he wants you to hurt to make him not hurt? Think about why you are breaking up, most people dont break up just to keep seeing each other? so really search yourself...why did you break up and why do you feel the need to still see and or hear from him...all in all, make sure you are looking out for you!
2007-02-14 19:41:36 · answer #5 · answered by no_me_no_u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not seeing him anymore means just that, not (ohh well not for a few weeks anyway).you're either confused, or more likely have another guy on the side and want to string this guy along.anywayz do him a big favor stop messing with his head you selfish girl.
2007-02-14 19:44:16 · answer #6 · answered by bentley f 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth as you know it. Whether he understands it or not is not up to you. If he is upset that is all him and has nothing to do with you no matter what he may say...or you may feel.
Do what you know is best for you. That will ultimately be best for everyone.
2007-02-14 19:38:10 · answer #7 · answered by Brent 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What advice do you need? It's over. After he collects his stuff that's it. No more phone calls. Nothing.
2007-02-14 19:39:07 · answer #8 · answered by m k 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep it business. Let him do the talking, and don't say to much. Keep it simple.
2007-02-14 19:39:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you're doing what's best for you. If he doesn't accept it or understand that, that's not your problem.
2007-02-14 19:38:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋