I was dumped in late October of last year after a "serious" 4 year relationship. I must admit, I am still pretty bumed out and it's been a little over 3 months. I still feel a lot of anger and sadness when I think about this person. I am in school, so i'm pretty busy. But I just don't know how I will ever move on with my life since I can't seem to force myself to leave the house, except for when I go to school and excerise. I certainly don't want a new relationship, and sitting at home makes me feel most happy right now. But I'm concerned it may be bad for me to be so isolated. I am wondering, does one heal aftrer a certain amount of time after a long relationship like this?
2007-02-14 11:00:42 · 11 answers · asked by V.V. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, at least you're getting out of the house and exercising, and that's a lot more than others who suffer from serious depression do.
You sound very emotionally healthy if you can enjoy staying at home & you're not yearning for someone to fill an empty space.
Healing comes in time, absolutely. We often wonder "when's the light at the end of the tunnel coming?" but it always comes.
2007-02-14 11:08:00 · answer #1 · answered by Tom K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time pretty much heals all wounds. You can speed up the process though. And unfortunately it often takes a new relationship to do it. But not always.
Sticking around the house is OK, but will not get you past this. You need to get out. Do the things you enjoy. Don't go looking for a relationship. When you are ready, one will find you. Try to make yourself happy. Be with friends. Stay busy, but not all work. All work and no play, makes you a workaholic and a dull girl. It's OK to stay focused, but have yourself some fun, as often as you can. Before you know it, you won't even be thinking about him. Then all of a sudden, someone better will take his place.
2007-02-14 19:15:13 · answer #2 · answered by TopCatt 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sure this is not average but I am still hurting from a break up that happened 16 years ago from high school. I mean seriously hurting! I have managed to nearly ruin my life over it. It is bad to isolate yourself. Find some friends that can help you talk about your anxieties, insecurities, and anger. Try some professional counseling. Don't let it consume your life or you will end up being a sad, lonely, OLD person pining for your lost youth. I could have lived everyday LIKE it was my last, instead I have lived everyday wishing it WAS my last. Get out there and live before your life has passed you by. Life is much shorter than you think.
2007-02-14 19:19:00 · answer #3 · answered by coopta85 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i was with someone for 5 years and that relationship ended in November of 05 and i still get bummed about it every now and again. but you can't isolate yourself. go out with friends and have a good time. the sadness and anger is not just going to turn off like a light switch, even though i am sure everyone wishes it could. for some it takes more time then others. you need start living again and that will be the first step to self healing. i wish you the best of luck recovering.
2007-02-14 19:11:03 · answer #4 · answered by maggie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's perfectly normal to be sad and angry after the end of a relationship, but if you want to move on then you need to spend time with other people, get out and do things you enjoy.
there is no set amount of time you have to "get over them" but it's unhealthy to focus on the past and isolate yourself. try to reconcile yourself with the changes in your life, and do it at your own pace. healing takes time, and it's never easy- i'm sorry there are no definite answers or easy solutions for you
2007-02-14 19:13:33 · answer #5 · answered by Kate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've got the Hook-up! One, You're much too Beautiful, to be stuck in the House. Get out ans show the World, just how much of an Angel, you can be. Secondly. You need to take my Course, on Love 101. It says, to fall in Love? You must be willing to listen to your Heart. And have your Heart, talk to his. Once they get to agreeing with thing? It's a Match. it's not in your Body, (not going there) It's not in his Bank Account. Not in the protection of being alone. It's the feeling that only The heart can give you. You're keeping someone from Falling in Love with an Angel. Now go out and meet him! He's waiting for you! Should I get you a Cap & Gown, for your Graduation? Luck & Love!
2007-02-14 19:11:08 · answer #6 · answered by Goggles 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It can take a while. Don't say no when friends try to take you out. I know it's hard to be around people right now but this is your best bet to feel better. It will make you feel like there is a world outside of him and your relationship. I know how you feel!
2007-02-14 19:13:00 · answer #7 · answered by Linda B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Continue to concentrate on making yourself happy. I'm in there with you, only I was the "dumper" and I'm still miserable after 3 months. I hope happiness finds you.
2007-02-14 19:08:12 · answer #8 · answered by Joe P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it depends on the person because for me i had been with a guy for 5 years too and when he broke my heart at 16 i still can't get over it and can't bear to open my heart again and now i'm 18
2007-02-14 19:08:57 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U won't heal or get better feeling unless you let yourself. Get out with friends and keep yourself busy with friendly smiling people.
2007-02-14 19:09:55 · answer #10 · answered by Sher 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋