I found out that he has been emailing someone, but the person doesn't respond to him. It was few months ago, and he is still insisting. Today is Valentines, and I found out that he wrote to her recently, and to visited her where she works a couple of days ago. Hes is 49 years old and I am 42.
I can't tell him that I read the email, but I feel so mad!!! and we are going out tonight. I don't feel like going out with him tonight after what I read.
My thought is to go, and not tell him anything about what I read, then I will see how far he can go.
2007-02-14 09:43:48 · 9 answers · asked by parisdreem 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I suggest being direct about your concern. Tell him how you feel about him and ask him if he has doubts about your relationship. Best case senario: he repects your feelings enough to be honest with you. Worst: He already has or is planning on cheating on you and he will lie, and all lies come out eventually. I don't think reading someone's email is dishonest...when you are in a relationship, you are supposed to sacrifice a lot of privacy and be open with the person you are in a relationship with...spying can be taken too far, but generally, he should be held accountable for his behavior. His behavior is causing the mistrust...and do you want to be with someone who makes you feel insecure or loved? Just don't mirror his behavior by lying and trying to secure real proof of his cheating...your questions to him will become accusatory, you will drive yourself crazy watching his every move, and you will be no better than he is. After major heartbreak, dignity and self-respect are a few of the only things that will help your survive.
2007-02-14 10:00:44 · answer #1 · answered by auburn_irish 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well no good comes from reading email not intended for you. That being said, if he is out looking this is so NOT good. Do you want to live in a fools paradise pretending things are fine when they are not? When you see him ask him flat out how he feels your relationship is going, because YOU have concerns. Try to act nonchalant and light about it and not that it hurts you. Even though it may hurt it is better to know NOW than be hurt LATER.
Good luck. Perhaps you should both step back and see others and how that works out. Stay friends, if possible.
2007-02-14 09:51:05 · answer #2 · answered by Gwen H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as difficult as it is, you have two options in my opinion. suck it up and ride it out hoping for the best, but not allowing yourself to expect anything .... which is really difficult .... or tell him that you get the sense that he is distracted lately and you want to know if he wants to take a break from the relationship... which also is really difficult.
do you want to not be single but be with a guy who isn't making you happy or do you want to be single so that you can go out and find someone who will only have eyes for you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
thats my opinion. save yourself the heartache of actually being cheated on ... it is no fun, it hurts a lot and who knows how many ways it could negatively impact you emotionally and physically.
2007-02-14 09:54:39 · answer #3 · answered by thechewtoyboy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's out shopping. I don't know your situation, whether or not you two have kids, etc., but I think if not you should be doing the same! It sounds like he is keeping his options open. I would say nothing, you already know this is the case; what would you accomplish. I think you're right see how far he can go and then spring it on him when you actually have something substantial, and have your escape route planned.
2007-02-14 09:53:38 · answer #4 · answered by Heywood J Helpaguy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a similar situation... with my ex... After I read some stuff in his email I was shoked, so I told him that I saw dream and it was bothering me very much, so (I told him) I went to reading and I know that there is something going on with him anf someone else... After that he was afraid to do this kind of things, because he though I'm witch lol... But in the end , that relationship didn't work out any way, so if he ready to go - let him go, but don't let him fool you ...
2016-05-23 23:31:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well as another single female,
You deserve better, for yourself.
if he can't see that let him go, move on.
the thing is were you clear to him on the relationship?
or was it to begin with an open relationship?
that is just inviting trouble.
2007-02-14 09:55:38 · answer #6 · answered by Elka 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would tell him that you went through his email. if you cant trust him you have nothing and i would do it when ever i dont care if its valentines day. no one deserves to be lied or cheated on. i wouldnt put up with it
2007-02-14 09:48:26 · answer #7 · answered by .em. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
obviously if you distrust him enough to spy on his email, the relationship is over anyway.
2007-02-14 09:50:22 · answer #8 · answered by zmj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make him feel as meserable as you can
2007-02-14 09:47:16 · answer #9 · answered by Diana R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋