They went out to clubs together with a bunch of old friends when i was out of town. Then the two of them went back to his place after bars closed, she was there until 5am/dawn. Says they talked the entire time and nothing happened. I am haveing issues with trusting her now. advice?
2007-02-14 08:28:57 · 20 answers · asked by monty 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
"talk" is that how they call that now???? dude either if she did or did not sleep with him she basically disrespected your relationship anyway........hanging out in a bar is one thing but going back to your ex's apartment and stay there until 5 a.m. is another.......she should've known better than to go back to his place even if nothing happened.......these are the things that start to grow insecurities and trust issues in a relationship......you have all the reason to in not to trust her........the best thing to do now is talk to her straight up and tell her that you feel she disrespected you and your relationship by going overthere.
2007-02-14 08:52:03 · answer #1 · answered by fox mulder 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Issues with trusting her? Lol wow ... No bro, the "issue" here isn't with "you". Trust me.
First, your girl has no business hanging out with her exboyfriend when she has YOU. I'm surprised you're so calm. If it were me, she wouldn't be my girlfriend anymore, but rather my ex. Have some pride and self-value for yourself man.
She was with her ex until 5am? I'm not even going to continue. You know there's something extremely wrong here. You want advice? Here's the bold truth, maybe it's not want you want to hear, but it's the truth: Leave her.
How inconsiderate can someone be? Let me ask you something. Would you ever do that to a girl you truly, deeply loved? Exactly ...
You deserve better. Of course this is only an opinion. If it were me, I would have already left her, and I sure as hell wouldn't be on yahoo answers. I'd be doing something productive and something fun. Have your pride man. Because when it's all set and done, that's all you have left. Self-value. You're unique, you're you, and someone out there will fall madly, deeply in love with you. Always be yourself and never change.
2007-02-14 08:36:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch... I had a similar issue with my wife. I travel a lot with my job and we've never had any problems. Then a guy at her work started sweet talking her and telling her all the things she is missing because I'm gone and how he could fill her "void." This lead to secret phone calls, text messages and e-mails. I picked up on it but was unaware of how far it went. Then I had to leave town for 2 days and I decided to come home early. When I did I found that she wasn't home the ENTIRE night. She got home at 9 AM the next morning. I ended up falling asleep and because she stayed up all night she fell asleep instead of waking me up. I awoke to find her there and checked her cell phone. I found a bunch of perverted text messages and directions on how to get to his house. She still claims nothing happened, they just drank some and talked all night. I told her to choose, either him or me but you can't have both. She chose me and I deleted him from her phone and made her find a different job. She didn't like it but that was the only way I could begin to trust her again. I still check her cell phone and found out her e-mail password so I check that also. The biggest thing for me was to get smart. Look for the obvious things that something is going on, she'll begin to change her routines and try to hide things that she didn't used to. Like my wife started turning her phone off at night or when she was around me she would put it on silent so it wouldn't ring. And she changed her ring tone on his name, so when it rang it rang the same song as her best friend, so I would think it was her calling not him. Take a look at things closer and if something is going on you'll notice slight changes in behavior and in her routines.
2007-02-14 08:39:03 · answer #3 · answered by mac_attack_51 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd talk to her about how you feel if I were you. Say that it makes you feel uncomfortable and although you want to trust her, she's makin it difficult by laying down rules like tha you're not allowed to go along!? She could turn this on it's head and say that you need to trust her for the relationship to work but to be honest, as a girl myself who has just started a new relationship, I wouldn't be remotely interested in hanging out with my exes and if I was wanting to hang out with them, I would understand my boyfriends apprehension about and not be mad about him being paranoid? I just tink you should talk it out with her, ask her how she'd feel if you wanted to spend time alone hanging outwith your exes!???
2016-05-23 23:19:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her about it. Respect her answer. Tell her you don't want her doing that again. If it happens again, get rid of her. If you don't like her answer, get rid of her.
Honestly, I've been in that same situation. My girlfriend always called her ex "as friends", hung out with him, and drove him home from parties. I told her I didn't like it. She didn't said I was over reacting. Needless to say that was the beginning of the end. I found out after we broke up she spent the night at his house once. Do I think they did something, hell yes.
If she can't respect you and not do something that hurts you, she's not worth it. Get out now, it'll only get worse. It did for me.
2007-02-14 08:34:16 · answer #5 · answered by Jdmnd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she still show interest in him when she's hanging out with you? I mean, I know where you're coming from. I would feel the same way if my boyfriend hung out with his ex too. But don't jump to conclusions. If you feel like you can't trust her then maybe you shouldn't be with her.
2007-02-14 08:33:49 · answer #6 · answered by 'Leta 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could see if she was just hanging out with the ex yea, but staying by him until dawn is a big no. When i stayed by my ex late one night we did more than talk.
2007-02-14 08:32:28 · answer #7 · answered by baby_luv 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shes loose. Leave her. You definitely know they did the nasty, c'mon you dont have to paint a picture on that one.
How long have you known her? if its more than 3 years then...
they hooked up or planning to hook up. They are are gonna figure out a way to tell you without losing you as friend. How should you react? BE PREPARED!
2007-02-14 08:40:54 · answer #8 · answered by mBreeZe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump her a*ss. She lied to your face. Why don't you go out with an ex and stay at her place until 5 AM and tell your girlfriend that you just "talked." Boy, it doesn't take a genius to figure this one out.
2007-02-14 08:39:55 · answer #9 · answered by Sax M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her once if anything happened then take her word for it. If something is going on it'll eventually come out. If there is nothing then you've left it alone.
2007-02-14 08:31:21 · answer #10 · answered by J.C. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋