Are we moving too fast?

Question

I have a boyfriend that I've been with not even a month. We've met once and there was an instant attraction. The next night, he went back to Jersey to get his belongings and tie up some loose ends up there. We've talked on the phone for hours and hours every single night for almost a month. He is coming home Saturday and coming to my house. We've decided to move in together. I know that it sounds crazy, 'cause we've only met 1 time, but I've fallen madly in love with his personality.
Does anyone think we are moving too fast?

I should probably have mentioned that, while he is coming to my house, it's only for about a week, until his cousin gets down here, then he will be staying with his cousin and his cousins grandpa. We aren't looking to move out until the beginning of April

Answer 1

Moving in together and you've only actually been in each others' presence once? Yeah, that's way too fast..

Answer 2

With all due respect - you haven't been with him a month. You've been with him once.

That you have kept in touch and talked on the phone is great. That the attraction has sustained is great. It is certainly possible that you have fallen in love with his personality.

But moving in together? MAJOR mistake. Because you're not living with his personality, you're living with his smelly feet, and his 45-minute showers and that he drinks milk right out of the carton - or whatever.

The point is you need to know a lot more about him - the total package him - and he you - before you take that step of living together. Try dating.

See, part of the problem is that you are putting a tremendous amount of pressure on this relationship before it has a chance to find its feet. And if it turns out to be a mistake, it is a lot easier to break off a dating relationship than a living together one.

I know, in the full flush of love and lust, these are not words you want to hear. But YES - you are moving way too fast. If you love him, for both your sakes, slow down.

Answer 3

I am not against his moving to be closer to you, but I do think that moving in together after one month is way too soon. You do both know eachother on one level, but the day to day experience of being with someone is so much more intense and different. When you live together a whole new arena of relationship issues comes out and the two of you haven't even been through normal relationship issues yet. Is there anywhere else he could live?

I don't think it is crazy, but I would also have a back up plan.

Answer 4

Chica you are moving at warp speed. You should really take more time before you consider moving in. Most of my friends have moved in together because it was more practical than them spending every night of the week around each others houses. That all developed over time. You are not allowing yourself this and are making a snap decision.

I would advise you to hold back till you've got through the lust and then consider your housing situation again.

Answer 5

My Grandma and Grandpa knew each other for a month, and GOT MARRIED! and had 7 kids and was together over 20 something years untill my grandpa passed away. Your moving to fast ONLY if you feel that you are. Enjoy your love sweetie. I wish you both the best of luck and happy valentines day!!!!

Answer 6

WAY to fast. You don't even know this person, you only know what he's chosen to reveal and what you've gleaned from conversation. It's not love, it's infatuation and being in love with love (not with the guy).

It may or may not work out, but chances are you're in for a very rude awakening when you start living together and learn each other's bad habits, and see the "real" person behind the infatuation and starry eyes.

Answer 7

possibly by using fact at those a while the place we are, we don't p.c.. lots pastime into our each and every days as we did whilst youthful. Alarms at 6:30, showers with the help of seven:15, espresso and a doughnut out the door, heat the automobile in under 5 minutes, stratagize suited site visitors routes, park, walk, enter, communicate, arrive at trip spot, sit down, start up, wreck for lunch, return, leave, walk, heat the automobile, stratagize the site visitors, liberate the door, exchange outfits, prepare meal, use those final 4 or 5 hours in yet differently every day, plop down with a e book, set the alarm, repeat 5 days until eventually retirement as adversarial no alarms.

Answer 8

ha..ha..ha yea im sorry but you guys are moving so fast lol sounds like by next month ur gonna have a family of 4 living in the city, then by 2 months from now ull send the kids to college, seriously i respect how much you love him but your moving way to fast for your won good and its only gonna end up in heartbreak you have to take things slow because i can tell you when he moves in things are NOT gonna seem as perfect as they are now, cause everyones perfect when you dont c them face to face and just over the phone, meet in person and the guys as fun as a brick wall, just be careful from here

Answer 9

In my opinion I realy do think that your moviing to fast. Don't confuse love with lust. And for another thing you've only known him for a month and your moving in with him at least give it a few more months before he actually moves in. Good Luck

Answer 10

well its all how you view the situation ...i think that you are, i mean obviously your addicted to this guys personality but hun remember not all things are, as how they seem.. make sure this guy isnt a total psycho, have your friends seen him, what do they think? moving in with someone is a pretty big deal, will you get sick of him eventually, will you fight, will he screw you over on the bills?