I've been with this girl, she is 19 years of age and I'm 28 years old, she knew that I live by myself and being independently,I work full time in accounting. She want to come over to my apartment just for visit by herself without friends with. I just graduated in Master degree. She just started in first year college.She want everything from me such alcohol and blow up her birthday party with her friends too. Should I just say no to her? I feel like being used by her tho
2007-02-14 06:49:57 · 38 answers · asked by Haryo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hey, if you feel used there is a pretty good chance that that's what's going on. When you've had enough, you can say 'no'.
2007-02-14 06:54:36 · answer #1 · answered by Clueless 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you expect you are dating a 19 year old. She probably still lives at home with mom and dad.
Of course she's going to want you to get her alcohol, she can't even legally drink for another two years!!
You aren't being used by her in the least, in fact if anyone is using you are using her!
If you can't see what's wrong with you pretty much saying "why isn't my 19 year old girl friend mature, I'm 28" Then, I've got a great car to sell you and it'll only cost you 50,000 dollars.
I'm not saying that it is not possible to enter into a relationship with someone who is 19 when you are 28, I mean the law says it's legal. However, they would have to be mature beyond their years, which is a rare quality in a 19 year old. Obviously, this one does not possess it.
Maybe, it's time you started dating the 21 and over crowd.
2007-02-14 06:57:58 · answer #2 · answered by Quest4questions 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well! If you think that she is using you then don't throw her a b-day party! But if you lov e her then you will! I think that your gf is normal, because she is just other teenage girls, she want every thing, and if she does not get it she will get mad and wont talk to you unless you get something. But if I were you I would not throw her b-day party just her something special for valentines day like any other bf would do! But go with your instincts! Besides she is young, and nobody can just get everything they want, and you should be the first to show her that a relationship is just not about giving, its about a lot more than what you think!!!
2007-02-14 06:57:01 · answer #3 · answered by smith_kallissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is quite hard to understand, are you asking if she is just using you as you have a place with out parents etc.? Well, if you said no to her, would she leave? Try it, say you're not comfortable with having a lot of younger people over for a party - but she can have a few. If you trust her it'll be ok and if you're there it'll be okay but why woudl she want to be there without you?
just be honest and ask her, if she leaves because you said no, then you're better off without her anyway
2007-02-14 06:54:34 · answer #4 · answered by gigi s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she IS a gold digger. but look at it this way. because of your age differences and especially because of your status, she probably thinks you will do all and everything for her. from bringing her out to buying this and buying that. WHat u should do, is tell her point blank that it doesn't and cannot work like that. you could do this by telling her one evening while you two are together at your house or as you like. You seem to have genuine feelings for her so the question is...does she feel the same way?
cutefergie..,peer counselor
2007-02-14 07:05:51 · answer #5 · answered by Nikki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is normal in wanting to be alone with you. Helping her with her friends and her party, means she trust you to do the job right. Say no to the alcohol. You on the other had, want her to be their for you. Why don't you go out some where when she wants to come over alone. Do you plan to marry her? Look hard in to yourself and find out if she is the only one you want. You seem to have doubts sbout this.
2007-02-14 07:06:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haryo,
If you indeed have an MA, you should take the time to compose sentences that read intelligently.
I'm finding it difficult to be convinced you are a normal 28 year old with an MA.
2007-02-14 07:01:19 · answer #7 · answered by Fanny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
FIRST: Too much of an age difference, I find that disturbing. It's going to make some complicated feelings the whole time.
SECOND: No, she's not uuuuuuuuusing you. It sounds like you don't respect her at all. So of course she better get something out of dating someone like you. She's young, and her life is just starting, she's trying to have fun. If you don't want her, don't have her.
2007-02-14 06:55:35 · answer #8 · answered by Jenny 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you feel like you're being used you might just be. A sure way to test this out is to tell her no and if she throws a fit than most likely she's no good and you should get rid of her
2007-02-14 06:54:30 · answer #9 · answered by superstar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, i'm 18 and my bf is 29...I ask him to get me liquior and stuff, but thats also because he drinks too. I would say to test her. The next time she asks you to get her something like that, tell her no and she how she reacts. If she throws a fit, then you know she's using you for that, if she doesn't, then you know she doesn't care. Good luck.
2007-02-14 06:54:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
since you are so mcu older and she is just 19, you are really like 'daddy' you have all this money and secure, yes, a 19 year old will take advantage of that. get an older more responsible woman who can care for herself and not looking for handouts, that way you won't feel used ...like you are.
2007-02-14 06:53:53 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋