I have a friend that I've been friends with since 3rd grade. In 7th grade her and her family moved far away. Since then we have kept in touch and talk on a regular basis. We see each other every two years or so. When we were little we use to talk about how we were going to be each others Maid of Honor. I am now 28 and 2 years ago she got married and asked me to be her Maid of Honor. I was a little surprised because so much time had passed I would have thought she would have chosen someone else. When I was 20 I met another girl who has been basically my best friend since. We lived together for 5 years and a have a wonderful friendship. She has helped me get through so many tough situations. I couldn't imagine getting married with out her right next to me. I am now engaged and have the dilemma of do I ask my best friend of 9 years or do I go with my childhood friend from 3rd grade. She kept her promise.....I feel almost inclined to have her has my maid of honor. suggestions?
2007-02-14 04:40:23 · 20 answers · asked by Smiles 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
My friend from 3rd grade would ask often if I've gotten engaged yet cause she wants to be a maid of honor. After my 3rd grade friends wedding i was out with a group a friends (including my best friend) and I said I felt obligated to have my 3rd grade friend as my maid of honor when/if I get married. This past November my best friend confided in me and told me that it really hurt her feelings that I said that and that I wouldn't have her as my maid of honor considering everything that we had been through. Now, last week sunday (super bowl sunday) is when my fiance proposed and this issue has been on my mind ever since.
2007-02-14 06:15:21 · update #1
Both my 3rd grade friend and best friend will be married by the time my wedding is.
2007-02-14 06:58:37 · update #2
Girl don't be crazy! She doesn't have to be your Maid of Honor, and she should understand that if she is truly a friend! When my best friend from Highschool (who I hadn't seen in a couple of years) asked me to be a bridesmaid, I freaked! I thought it was insane of her to ask, but I'm glad she did. We had talks of being each others Maid of Honor as well, and I'm glad she didn't pass that responsibilty over to me. Your Maid of Honor is the person who knows you best. Think about it like this: Does she know what you want to do for your Bachlorette? Does she know how you want to handle your Bridal Shower? Your Engagement/Annocement Party? You've been a Maid of Honor for her. Honestly ask yourself if you thought you were as good of a Maid of Honor to her, as one of her closer friends could've been? I don't mean to be harsh, but that's what it is in the end. If I would've been my friends Maid of Honor, the Bachlorette would've been wilder than she expected. I would've gone all out crazy, and it's just not who she is.
2007-02-14 05:02:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you 3rd grade friend is already married she would be a Matron of Honor. You can still have your new friend as a Maid of Honor.
2007-02-14 05:19:36 · answer #2 · answered by ee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should keep your promise and make your friend from 3rd grade your maid of honor and make your other friend a brides maid. Explain the situation to her and if she's a true friend she'll understand. If and when you have children you can make your 9 year friend the God mother. Also.....Congratulations on your wedding.
2007-02-14 04:55:41 · answer #3 · answered by CLM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you shouldn't be expected to honor your childhood promises. Don't feel guilty either because she asked you to be her maid of honor. Instead, ask the friend to be by your side, who has been a faithful friend to you throughout your single years. I would asked the other girl, who you don't see as often, to possibly be a bridesmaid but not the Matron of Honor. You have to follow your heart and do what's right for you to make your wedding as special as it should be!
Congratulations on your engagement!!
2007-02-14 04:47:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you have a maid of honor (the new girl) and a matron of honor (the old friend)? In such weddings, the maid of honor usually takes on all the traditional responsiblities, but the matron of honor still has an honorific title.
2007-02-14 06:54:58 · answer #5 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's YOUR wedding. You are the one that will look at the pictures through the years, not your friends. Have who you want, if you feel obligated to involve your friend, have her as a brides maid or let her know you need her in a more importan position and have her be the coordinator or your personal assistant. If she wants an explaination, tell her the truth but tell her you wanted her involved in a more personal part of your wedding or a part that you need someone you can count on.
2007-02-14 04:45:29 · answer #6 · answered by simply_moon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before we answer this question, I think more information is needed. What have you said about it to both friends? I'd find it hard to believe the subject hasn't come up with both of them. Fill us in...
What did you tell your best friend when she confided in you? Also, you said your 3rd grade friend wants to be A maid of honor. Is it just the title she wants?
2007-02-14 05:54:06 · answer #7 · answered by ButterflyKisses 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just remember that this is YOUR wedding. She made her choice but if you have different friend you would like to chose and whom you feel is better for the job then chose her. If you other friend gets in a funk then she is not a true friend. A true friend would be happy just to be near you on your wedding day. Just make her a bridesmaid and not the maid of honor.! and good luck
2007-02-14 04:59:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you have an easy solution since you said your 3rd grade friend is married, have her as the matron of honor and have your newer friend be the maid of honor, and keep her standing first, then matron 2nd. I think its wild how she kept her promise, and you should too, but it doesn't have to be at the sake of your new special friend!
2007-02-14 04:59:58 · answer #9 · answered by ASH 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have one be the Matron of honor and one the Maid of Honor. Unless they are both married, then just have two.
2007-02-14 04:54:08 · answer #10 · answered by Brown Eyed Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋