Addicted to pills and alcohol..this was posted to a blog by another sister and I thought I would repost it?

Question

I need some advice cause iam at my wits end.I have a sister.Slowly she is killing herself.Now people are going to tell me .Put her in treatment etc...Well she has done it all treatment, Jail.Dry out centers but nothing works.My sister drinks but she takes alot of pills and i mean alot.She is messed up all the time.She tries to kill herself all the time.She has cut her wrists,She has jumped out of a tree and broke her ribs just to get pain killers.You name it she has done it.She has a 13 year old son who she gives him pot and lets him drink and gives him pills.Her boyfriend had to get rid of all the guns cause she tried to shoot herself but instead she shot through the floor witch lucky no one was in the laundry where the shot went..She was on probation she tried killing herself for the 7 or 8 time maybe more she got put in jail for 72 hours that was it.Her probation officer did not help in any way..She is messed up all the time.She died twice on her way to the hospital.

Still she is into all them pills again..Me and my sister fight cause i tell her the way it is.Iam so mad at her .The anger the hate i have for her is unbelievable she is messing her life up and her son and she dont care at all.We are all waiting for that phone call saying she is dead.It is just a matter of time.I have never felt so helpless in my life.She called me up drunk and messed up on them damn pills told me again she is going to kill herself i was so mad i told her why are you calling me and telling me this if you are going to do it just do it..It may sound cold hearted but everytime when she called me i tried to talk her out of it.Iam sick and tired of all of it.I dont know what to do.My hands are tied.I guess iam so angry cause i cant do nothing about it.And she is letting her son do the same thing.He is going to turn out like her.This has been going on for a long time.My dad is so worried just waiting for that phone call .No body wants to do nothing.Iam sitting back watching

Iam sitting back watching her destroy her and her sons life and there is nothing i can do.I have cut ties with her cause i cant handle it any more.I dont want nothing to do with her messed up ***.But part of me still cant help but worry.Cant the family meaning the father sisters do something to put her away before she kills herself ..Like have her committed some where .I am lost..She would not go on her own free will that i do know..She use to have control with her family but she has lost it all.All i know is that iam done i cant do this no more..As far as iam concerned now i no longer have a sister.It is to much for me to handle .This has been going on for over a year i know it has to be longer.I guess i just need some advice for my dad on how to cope with this.Cause iam done this has torn our family apart.Maybe there is something my dad can do where the courts are concerned....

Answer 1

You may not want to hear this, but the truth is that you can't stop her. She is the only one who can stop herself. There are some people like that who require therapeutic incarceration. The best gift that you can give her is to allow her to feel the full weight of the consequences of her own actions. Treatment will not work unless she wants it. You must conspire with the legal system and the courts and a treatment system (that includes an addictionologist) to remove her child through child services, put her in lockdown and allow her to go through complete drug withdrawal. If all of her choices are seen by her as bad, but treatment is less bad, she may begin to want it enough.
You must be willing to protect yourself at all times and I suggest going to alanon meetings to learn how. She is her problem and you are your problem if you try to rescue her from the weight of her consequences, so you must be firm, or she will try to convince you that her behavior is somehow normal!This is the way addicts think. Plan on 1 month of recovery for each year of use and don't let her get out of a treatment center before that time ( or jail).
I treat addicts all day and I've learned that the 1st rule is if their lips are moving they are lying. The hard part for you will be learning to hate the disease and not the person. Make them grow up and learn to be responsible for their own lives and actions and the consequences thereof.

Answer 2

If your nephew is not being properly cared for I think it is necessary to call Children's Services because he is not receiving the care he needs. Maybe this would help give your sister a wake up call.... your nephew needs a safe and healthy environment and I do not feel your sister can provide that for him. Maybe consider taking your nephew in while your sister is in this mess.
Good luck with your sister, I hope she is able to get some help.
Be strong, you can do it.

Answer 3

please do not give up on her. At least you are concerned about her wellbeing and that of her son. Take her to a mental/psychiatric unit. In the mean time can arrangements be made for her son.

Answer 4

well it seems to me she at her wits end. mamy problems in her life. i know its hard to deal with people like that. the thing is . she is reaching out for help. i know it sounds silly. but its true. and it doesnt matter whos life they destroy in the meantime. im suprized they havent put her in an institution for trying to kill herself. you need to try to get custody of her child if possible. i dont see how the athorities are continuring to let him live with her. please try to b epatien twith her. drag her *** into rehab again. get someone to take her child in and take care of him until she gets her life toghther. if and when she does ge ther life together then she can ge ther child back. but she can keep putting he rchild in danger. please help her

Answer 5

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Addiction
http://www.nida.nih.gov/PODAT/PODATindex.html
http://www.addictionsearch.com/
http://joshuakane.diaryland.com/older.html
http://www.atforum.com/
http://www.soberrecovery.com/
http://www.recovery.org.uk/

Individual counselling can be of great benefit to those who are seeking help in tackling their own drug or alcohol problems. Such counselling can also help those people who are affected by the alcohol or drug abuse of another member of the family.