Q. Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? A. He's all right now
Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
Q. What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
A. The taste!
Q. How many ears did Davy Crockett have?
A. Three - his left ear, his right ear, and his wild front ear
I was just reading through that book "50 Things to do Before You Die" and I was really surprised that none of them was "Shout for help!"
Q: How many kids with Attention Deficit Disorder does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Hey! Do you wanna go play PlayStation!?
"Two Nuns And A Vampire"
Two nuns are out driving when a vampire drops onto the bonnet of
their car. "Quick sister," screams one nun, "Show him your cross!"
So the other nun leans out of the window and shouts, "Oi! You! F*ck off!"
Male or female...
Are you male or female?
To find the answer, look down!!!
Not here, Stupid!
2007-02-13 23:11:26 · 7 answers · asked by bob the monkey 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
love the mother in law one
2007-02-14 00:30:23 · answer #1 · answered by Jo H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice Bike
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his shiny new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"
The kid replies, "Yeah."
The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike."
The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.
The kid takes the ticket and before he rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"
Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did."
The kid continued, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."
2007-02-14 01:18:15 · answer #2 · answered by daniel a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only good jokes were the last to but nice try
2007-02-14 00:15:55 · answer #3 · answered by turley345 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha ha i went back to the top for the question dah
2007-02-14 02:00:46 · answer #4 · answered by joanne g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quite funny, last one was v. good.
2007-02-14 01:37:07 · answer #5 · answered by daniel_marsland 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thanks, They were great. I like the way you put the last one.
2007-02-17 08:04:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree with *turley345...but oh well...lmao
2007-02-14 00:34:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋