Love and in love?

Question

What does it mean that someone loves you but is not in love with you? Can you see any difference?

Thanks

I would like very much to have lizko2 answer because he told me this in his previous answer.....

Answer 1

Oh yeah, I've heard that one. It's the same as "I just like you as a friend." It's what someone says when they don't like you, but think that saying that is nicer than saying NO. Sometimes people are even more hurtful and rude by not saying what they mean.

Answer 2

You can care for someone, but not feel all warm and fuzzy everytime you see them. It's no different from loving a close family member in that sense.

Now, let me explain the difference as I see it. Hold on, this is a long one.

Being in love is a feeling. It's that total infatuation with someone, you feel like they are perfect, like the whole world is so much brighter when they are around. You can think of nothing but them. This is what you'll see in most romantic movies, etc. The one thing that some people don't realize about being in love, is that just like any other emotion, it is completely temporary. After a few months (or however long it is with that particular person) that feeling wears off, you start seeing the person for who they are, imperfections and all, and you start wondering where did that feeling go...

Loving someone is much deeper than that. To love someone is to make a conscious decision that you will act in their best interest, will support them and let them grow, regardless of how you feel about them at the moment or how they might hurt you. To love someone is to make a true commitment, a very deep bond with them. You might find with time that they are not as attractive, or as funny, or as smart as you thought they were. You might find that they were careless with your feelings and hurt you deeply by doing something selfish. And even though you at times feel like you can't stand them or they hurt you real bad, it doesn't change your commitment to them. You'll still be there in a blink of an eye when they need your help.

Whether it be a good parent's love for their child, or a true friend's love for another friend, or a wife's love for her husband, true love is that deep, that immovable. As the Good Book says, "love overcomes all things".

I think that in part this is why we have such a high divorce rate in this country. People think that feeling "in love" is integral to continue a relationship. It is not. It's great when it's there, but how great is it to know that someone is truly there for you no matter what happens. How safe does it make you feel? How thankful? I think that even when the feeling of being in love is gone, as long as you truly love the person, this love can always spark the feelings right back, because they are rooted deep in love.

That's why I think it is so wise that our marriage vows have such phrases as "for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health..." They didn't write "as long as I feel ecstatic to see you". Love will be there long after the looks and the misconceptions about that person are gone.

Ok, hope this helps.

Answer 3

hey hun...k, im not lizko2 =P ...but i liked your question n i figuered id put in my 2 cents. Their is a difference between loving some one and being in luv with someone...
in terms of a boyf/girlf relationship, when the person says they luv u, but they are not inlove with u it means they do care for u deeply, but havn't reached that complete, heart stopping, knee's weak, butterflies in the tummy, deep n tru kinda luv...but it does mean that they are gettting to reach that point of being in luv =)

Answer 4

Yes there are different kinds of love.

I love my children & I love some of my friends, male & female but I would not sleep with them.

With my partner it is a different sort of more intimate type of 'in love'

Answer 5

You can love somebody without being IN love with them.

In love is a relationship kinda of love. Like your patents love each other.

Regular Love is a more general like of somebody or something. Like your parents love you, or you love baseball.

You can love other people without being in love with them. Loving like how you respect human life. You love your friends, because you don't wish harm on them and you are looking out for their best.

The Stig

Answer 6

To say it like that means that s/he cares about the person but doesn't want to be romantic with the person.

Answer 7

love you means that there is a feeling but not intense which could also be the same as platonic love. in love means that your partner is into you. meaning there is intensity.

Answer 8

think it is natural thinking about love .