My 9 year old lost her pet a couple of weeks ago.....it died while she was at a sleepover and she had to come home to the news. Since then she has been complaining about not feeling good and she is not sleeping well at all. I finally took her to the doctors and they ran a bunch of tests and found her to be perfectly healthy. She is still completely convinced that she has a serious disease/health problem and is afraid that she is going to die. No matter how much I try and reassure her, it isn't helping. I am not sure where to go from here. Any suggestions would be greatly welcome. Thank you!
2007-02-13 18:22:52 · 10 answers · asked by gena_88@verizon.net 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
I'm sorry about your pet. The best thing is to get a new pet. I know people say that you can't replace them, but getting a new one really will help. Before too long she'll fall in love with her new pet and she'll do fine.
2007-02-13 18:28:15 · answer #1 · answered by sobefobik 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since she is 9 years old, she is old enough to understand the concept of life and death. Sit her down and talk to her about it. If she is ready, tell her everyone will die one day when it is their time but we must make full use of the time we have and live life to the fullest. You did not say what her previous pet was. Bring her to the SPCA and have her look at all the animals who need a good home. She's has given her previous pet a good life, it is now time to share that love to another animal who really needs her.. Giving her a sense of responsibility and 'mission' will empower her and help her feel better about herself. You can teach her to take good care of her own health so she can be there for the family and her new pet.. Good luck. I hope she gets better soon.
2007-02-13 18:34:39 · answer #2 · answered by aken 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eh, this is a tough one. It's hard for a child to understand death (I remembered I had a tough time when I was young). I suppose the route I would take would involve explaining the life cycle. Everything in this world dies eventually: plants, animals, even people. I would explain that it was he pet's time to go, and that she has nothing to worry about. She will live a long, happy life, and she shouldn't waste anytime worrying about it now. This may be a bit for a nine year old to take in, but it's the only advice I can give. Perhaps getting another pet would take her mind off of it. I hope I was of some help!
2007-02-13 18:30:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
We have a book called "The Fall of Freddie The Leaf". It explains in children's terms what happens when things die. It has really helped us deal with deaths of not only people, but also pets. I would think you should find it on Amazon.
I think getting a new pet may not be the answer, because she then might be overcome with the feeling that that pet might pass on as well, and it would make her fearful.
2007-02-14 01:47:38 · answer #4 · answered by Brooke 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting a new pet does help, but maybe you should have a serious talk with your daughter about what death is and what it means and how her pet died. I don't know the details so I cannot give you much more advise than that. But it sounds like she may be having issues about death, rather than the actual pet.
2007-02-13 18:31:44 · answer #5 · answered by snowangel_az 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A new pet is the best cure and please stop making a big deal out of this it just reinforces her troubles. Let her grieve her own way it will pass. Reassure her pets go to heaven too. Often children get the idea that if their pets can die and leave them Mommy and Daddy can too. Of course she is right and this hard hard fact of life needs to be learned. Tell her you aren't going anywhere and will always be around. Truly a new pet does the trick. It did for me and it did for my children too. They tend to "Reject" them at first as replacements but soon a few licks, a few yarn balls and presto.
2007-02-13 18:32:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a pet funeral or wake or memorial where she can say good-bye to her pet.
Get her a new pet to help her move on with her feelings and attention.
Talk to her and let her know why the pet died and that she's not going to have the same fiat. Children at that age get scared easily. Let her know what's going on.
2007-02-13 18:31:06 · answer #7 · answered by Angelica 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is in age that must know it...death is fact...
SHE is not sleeping well....Take her out and walk with her for hours or let she RUN and play...then you would see...
Don't take her to doctors any more..
Just NOT pay too much attention to her...
Trying too much would cause opposite resistance SO leave her alone...
When she said she is going to die...she need Attention...give her Attention...when saud 'i am going to die...tell her 'All of us would die one day... but this is the time to live...i like to enjoy my life..what about you...
2007-02-13 18:35:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your poor child. honestly there are pet support grief phone lines.
let her call one and let her talk it out.
Or just try that, and then she will be fine.
if not, take her to a therapist to who specializes in pet grief
*i'm not like most, but i had a pet cemetary, and a loss of a pet is like a member of the family*
your child is very sensitive.
read about the stages of grieving.
here are some sites, i hope you call the pet loss support hotline, and let her talk w/o you listening in. good luck!
perhaps-- this is very traumatic for her?
she is afraid she will be next, or maybe mommy.
here are some wonderful sites to help you out!!!
Pet Loss Grief Support, Rainbow Bridge, Monday Candle Ceremony,
Pet Loss Grief Support is the first place to visit when a beloved pet passes on. ... Click here for links to additional Pet-Grief Support and related Web Sites ...www.petloss.com - 23k - Cached - More from this site
Pet Grief
When a pet dies, there is no such social ritual to formalize the grief. To many, a funeral for the family pet would seem eccentric and a formal period ...www.petshub.com/pet-loss/pet-grief.php - 23k - Cached - More from this site
University of Florida Pet Grief Support Hotline
Volunteers supporting people who have suffered a death of a pet. ... University of Florida Pet Grief Hotline: About us. Making the call. Donations ...neuro.vetmed.ufl.edu/alt_med/petgrief/petloss.htm - 20k - Cached - More from this site
Pet Grief Support
PET GRIEF SUPPORT SERVICE ... a beloved companion animal, the Pet Grief Support Service recognizes your pain ... meetings, pet grief information, ...www.caaainc.org/petgriefsupport.htm - 21k - Cached - More from this site
Muns
GRIEVING THE LOSS OF A PET. Grief is the normal response to any important loss in life. ... whom the pet also is a child substitute). THE STAGES OF GRIEF ...www.petloss.com/muns.htm - 11k - Cached - More from this site
Pet Loss and Grief - Pets
... helping owners cope with grief over the loss of a pet or those facing a decision ... The stages of grief, how to know when it is 'time' and how to remember your pet. ...vetmedicine.about.com/od/lossandgrief/Loss_and_Grief.htm - 24k - Cached - More from this site
Pet Grief - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Pet Grief. From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. Jump to: navigation, search ... Studio albums: Lesser Matters - Pet Grief ...
Quick Links: Track listing
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pet_Grief - 19k - Cached - More from this site
Pet Loss Grief Support - Dealing with Pet Bereavement
... winning audiobook 'Journey Through Pet Loss' helps pet lovers coping with the ... of grief, highlighting in a poignant way the many levels of feeling pet owners ...www.petlossaudio.com/petloss.html - 12k - Cached - More from this site
Pet loss and grief - Article on Pets.ca
... on pet loss and ... it helpful in realizing that grief is a perfectly normal human process. ... speak about your pet and your feelings of grief to a close and ...www.pets.ca/articles/article-grief.htm - 38k - Cached - More from this site
Pet Grief
This page replaces the original Pet Grief article on the Pets 2 Rest site. ... original advice I had collected regarding pet grief but in a more personal tone. ...www.pets2rest.co.uk/pet-grief.htm -
2007-02-13 18:31:56 · answer #9 · answered by Lilly 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get a new one, Thats what I did. And it helped. Its not gonna replace it, but its something to love.
2007-02-13 18:30:28 · answer #10 · answered by Lonely_star☆ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋