Please help...?

Question

I feel very hopless, alone and very sad. I cant stop crying. Someone I really cared about betrayed me it the worst way. And he doesn't even seem to care and won't confront me. He wants nothing to do with me, yet he betrayed me. I never did anything to him until I found out what he did. He is my now ex, I helped him thru depression, suicide feelings, helping accept he had a daughter who he denied because he wanted nothing to do with the mother or child, it was one night stand thing. Now he is best freinds with the mother( actually was getting to know her, but it didnt work out i guess) , loves his child, yet through me away like I never existed:(( I can honestly say I did nothing to him, and he was so cruel to me, becasue I found out the truth about him seeing the mother. I know I must let it go, but for crying out loud, how can someone be this hurtful to someone. Its been 7 months, and I have such a hard time dealing with it all. I am getting help and am not on

any anti-depressants, but have tried them. My body couldn't handle them.If anyone understands the characteristics of my ex, please let me know. Did anyone do anything like what he did, was it the cause of BPD, or bi-polar? He made me feel like I was at fault for things. I dodnt do anyhting but ever help him.:(((

Answer 1

What your feeling is normal for this situation, you are greiving for what you had with this guy, and also deeply hurt by his treatment fo you as you helped him through his darkest days....

Firstly you are not to blame for his actions towards you, remeber that you are in no way to blame for what he has done to you, so dont look for faults in yourself, you are a very wonderful person and right now he has taken that away from you by his actions..

You are feeling hopeless as you dont know why he is being like this, dont torture yourself wondering only he can give you those answers, next time you see him ask why he has treated you like this and tell him you dont deserve this treatment, as when he was down you stood by him when he was at his lowest. And another thing to tell yourself if it wasnt for you he probably wouldnt be here, you saved his life and he should be eternally grateful to you for that alone...

You are a better person than him or he will ever be and you deserve better, its hard just now because you cant beleive he would do such a thing, but he has and he should be feeling guilty for what he has done, some people have no scruples or morals thats their problem and when it happens to him again he wont have your support to get him through cause it will happen to him again, dont be dragged back by him when it does...

You are getting help and thats a positive thing, get counselling get all your feelings out and pent up emotions dont be embaressed to cry or be angry these a re natural feelings at a time like this. Keep a journal write your feeling down daily, start to think positive what do you want in your life from now on, set aims for yourself like joining a club, going to college, meeting new friends, get out and about dont sit and go over things in your head keep busy..... You have your whole life in front of you make it what you want it to be dont let this hold you back.....

Remeber this you are a caring,kind,considerate, loving person and there is plenty of people out there who need you, family,friends..Sometimes these trials are sent to try us you will be a stronger person at the end of this, cut all contact with him move on he isnt worth the heartache its his loss not yours...

Take care hope you feel better soon and it will ease stay focused and positive you are special never5 forget that...

Answer 2

What your going through is normal. There are things you can do ,first you are not a fault he is.It will take a little time and effort from you though.Go sound your self with friends and family.
That way it can take the sting from these feelings.Do hobbies for the same reason.When your ready take these steps before getting into a relationship,you start by making ground rules if the next guy breaks the rules make him an ultimatum.Shape up or ship out.This way your in command.

Answer 3

He was sick and you helped him get better. Now someone else is helping him get well. People encourage people to help people, but it is best left to the healthy strong people to do the helping.
You may notice that healthy people like to be with healthy people. That's because they don't want to get into the jam that you're in.
You are not cut out to be a rescue person. If you can remember that, then this is a very valuable lesson. Be thankful its over, but he will try to come back. That's when you need to be strong, cause he'll keep hurting you as long as you allow it.