i feel like I'm not appreciated by my bf,are my feelings justified?

Question

in the 5 yrs that i have been dating my bf i do everything from taking care of his sick child to scheduling his appts. to cooking,cleaning,along with paying 50% of our bills(we live together)after 5 yrs i only got flowers once(valentines day with me hinting)2 cards(birthdays) and thats it.now i don't want to sound shallow but after hearing about how he sent other gfs boxes of cards and dozen of roses(his sister told me) i can't help feel shorted.when i asked him why he just said he does not think about it.thats the problem how come he thought about it with the other gfs? he was allways like this even when we 1st started dating

Answer 1

I know the answer: he's been hurt. In one of his past relationships, he probably did do every he could for her, and in the end she left, or cheated, or something along those lines. Maybe im jumping to conclusions, but if you've been together 5 years, you should know his relationship past. If you don't, you NEED to get that conversation out of the way. You say you've asked him y he doesnt do those things for you, find out the real reason. If he has been hurt, reassure him that the same wont happen again, that you aren't that other girl and that you love him very much. Tell him you need him to show he cares more. He's a male, and when we get hurt, we get defensive. He's protecting himself from further damage, and you need to reassure him that YOU will do the protecting for him, your not going to hurt him like whoever did. That should help a lot.

Answer 2

He sounds like so many guys very inconsiderate. Stop doing everything you do for him, and once he says something tell him for now on you will do as much for him as he does for you.