WHY do I choose to stay a drunk instead of going back to AA?

Question

I was sober for 5 months, but my sponsor was useless so I went out of the program and now I'm scared/embarrased to go back as a newcomer.

Answer 1

It's the disease....unfortunately relapse is a common thing. It's what we do if we do not work the steps, get a higher power and stay connected.

Don't blame your sponser. It has nothing to do with what they did or did not do for you. Call another alcooholic and dive back into the program. Get another sponser at your first meeting back and start working the steps.

I know it's hard going back and raising your hand with one day, I have had to do it and I know countless others that have and we are all sober now and have been for quite a while. Humble yourself and take the first step. My dad is struggling with the same thing. He relapsed with over 3 years sober. What's working for him is just staying connected and talking to other alcolholics everyday.

Answer 2

If I were you, I would be more afraid of blacking out, losing relationships, jobs, friends, and what you are missing in life than facing people who will welcome you back with open arms.

So you feel a little akward for an hour, no biggie when you look at the whole picture. The longer you drink, the harder it is to go back. Denial is a symptom that progresses with our addiction.

If you didn't pick a great sponser the first time, use that knowledge to pick a better one the second time.

Find one who talks about the big book, has some time in the program, and has something you want. A sponser can only do so much, they are not mind readers, have no magic wands and are limited by what we give them. If you give them the facts and they have no answers or are not available to you then look else where. Keep your sponser the same sex as you, and then get more than one. My first one was an older lady, who was very motherly, my second one was like a sister and a third who kicked my behind when I started veering off the path. I had all three at the same time. This gave me a varity. I relapsed after six months, felt really stupid goiong back, when I did, I got a lot of hugs and words of encouragement. I have been clean and sober now for over 25 years. One day at a time. I hope you come back.
A friend of Bill W. Cindy S

Answer 3

You've got to be kidding us . That is NO reason to remain a drunken slob just because the sponsor was useless . Get your butt over there and show some backbone . Who cares about other people. Only YOU count. There is a whole wonderful future ahead of you and you want to spend it in a drunken stupor ? Look in the mirror and see how good you look when you are sober . No way do you want to return to the old ways .
Now, get dressed to kill and show the world you are a success .

Answer 4

well see you need to go back first of all do not blame your sponsor .it seems like you are looking for an excuse to stay a drunk.take responseability for that and go from there .listen everyone who is there is there for the same reason ... to get help.they will see you coming back as you trying dont be embarrased at least you are going back good luck .stay strong it will be hard at first but it will very rewarding in the future

Answer 5

Maybe this story will change your mind. A couple were together for years, the loves of eachother's lives. They had kids, she worked, he drank. Time went on and on, she went to Al-Anon looking for that last sliver of hope that he would see and change. He knew he was alcoholic, he would tell you so,almost bragging. It's been six years since he died of chirrosis of the liver/alcoholism. He left behind the love of his life and his kids. He just turned 50. Think about it,then get your scared *** back to AA.

Answer 6

If you really care about your health and well-being, you'll gain some willpower and show back up to AA. If your sponsor sucks, get a new one. Being a little scared/embarassed to show up again is hardly a good reason not to go.

Answer 7

alcoholism is probably mostly genetic but that certainly does not mean you have to drink
i c u blame your sponsor (think about it, dont drink about it).
it worked for 5 months and u could always request a change of sponsor
take responsibility
im sure theyll welcome u back
or change ur branch

PS i wish the AA would allow independent third parties to investigate their data and claims
until then i wont believe them

Answer 8

You are a coward. Using anything to escape reality constantly is the evidence. Kick yourself in the butt for being so gullible as to believe you NEED anything to be yourself.... and happy with your lot in life. Quit crying in your beer and make a life for yourself.

Answer 9

**** em drink all you want.. my friend you only live once.. so you might lose your job, your family, and friends.. booze will always stand beside you.