Does the Heart Ever Heal??

Question

Today i was thinking, wow it's been 1 year and 6 months since i was the happiest person in the world, with the most amazing girlfriend ever..... but one year and six months ago, it ended..... and as i was listening to the song "one year six months" bye yellowcard.... i felt that it was my fault, that she is gone because of me...... Is this natural? or am i just over exagerating this?

Answer 1

It's natural to look back on a relationship and wonder what would've happened... what went wrong... how you could've fixed it... etc.

All you can really do now is learn from it. Build from it. Use the past to build the future.

And remember that God has a plan for you. Just have faith in Him.


Don't just go off and force yourself to fall in love again. It doesn't work that way. You'll just end up hurting yourself even more... and it'll be more of a rebound. Just let God handle it. He will bring you the right one in His time.

Answer 2

Well I think it's just dependent on the person, whether or not their heart can heal. I mean some people find it quite easy to just "move on" and find someone new, even after a long term relationship just got over with. Anyways I guess sometimes different people make a far greater impact on your emotions than others do. I also think it's a Mind Over Matter issue as well, because I think generally a lot of people will psych themselves out into thinking that, that person was the only one for them etc. Then they start to believe their own lies that they are telling themselves about why the relationship didn't work and what they could/should have done differently. I guess the biggest thing you have to remember is that you can't make someone else like you. You can love them to death and want to give them the world and you might be willing to swim across the ocean for them. However the other person either feels the same way, or they do not...there is no in betweens. So again, I think it's all boiled down to the psychological aspect of thinking in this case. ....it takes time to heal. it also takes an unwanted harsh look at reality to make you see yourself and your environment for what it is, and not what you wish it to be. ....You're only hurting yourself by not moving on and dwelling on the past. Think about it.

Answer 3

You know I can relate to this, but in a different way, so maybe this will help. I had a best friend, and I mean very, very best friend for 10 years. I told her everything, I trusted her with everything, I would do anything for her. I went through alot of hard times and sometimes she was all that got me through, things changed though. I saw how she took advantage of this, and she got into some bad things late in highschool, turns out she left me for the first person she could get to be her boyfriend, who coincidently used to like me, but hates me since I wouldn't date him since he's scum-really no friends or anything. And for breaking off the friendhsip I felt horribly quilty, even thought she did it maybe I was supposed to be strong for her and just stand by her till it fell apart and maybe she'd get her common sense back. I tried reasoning with her and instead found out how she was completely into this boy and ditched every other part of her life and wanted nothing to do with me if it threatened him. I was heartbroken, the only person I ever trusted more than anything didn't even wanted me, she used me. This realization helped me not to feel guilty and instead feel the anger I deserved to feel towards her. Anyway my point is, even to this day, I miss her. I miss her in the absolute worst way and I miss all the things we did together. I miss what I thought I had as my best friend and I miss thinking she'd always be with me. And I think back like you do to about almost a year ago when I met my current boyfriend and still had her and how I felt like the luckiest person ever and everything was finally going great. And sometimes I'm mad at her for ruining that, for making me hurt like this all the time. But I do see, and I think you will too, that there is a reason for this. I realized that yes, she did use me alot and i deserve better. I realized how many things I missed out on or let go by becuase I sacraficed for her so she wouldn't feel bad. I think you need to find that, what exactly under the circumstances on your old relationship, wasn't good for you and when you see it you'll feel better, you'll feel like a least it happened for a reason, and you'll find someone who will make you so much more happier and be greatful it's over. Until then all I can say is you're always going to miss her, you just have to find out why it was good for you too. I wish you best of luck!

Answer 4

The heart heals if you allow it to. It's a VERY resilient thing. So why are you choosing to let this bother you a year and a half later? What are you getting out of being hurt (still) instead of moving on to something else?

You'll hurt as long as you choose to hurt...when you make up your mind to let it go, you'll find your life is a bit more sunny.

Answer 5

Someone once told me that when you break-up with someone it's like mourning a death. You have to learn to live without them. Of course it's not going to happen from one day to another, but you'll learn to cope. I hate to tell you, but you'll never completely forget because she did mean something to you. Time will eventually heal your wound.

Answer 6

don´t worry it is not your fault, maybe yours wasn't meant to be, besides of course the heart heals you just have to give your self a break.
you´ll see how you are gonna get over her just dont worry
good luck

Answer 7

my heart is in pain i think it will never heal it been 11 long years and he decide to cheat on me and also had a baby with another girl that really torn me up.

Answer 8

Its normal you loved her, the heart heals but with time and slowly maintain busy it helps for me.

Answer 9

Just give it time and lots of chocolate bomboms and youll feel like a strong and handsom man again

Answer 10

when you fall in love again , that's when you know that you've HEALED !
so find yourself somebody to love and throw away the old baggage your carrying around cause that will bog you and your future new pal down !