I'm from New Jersey , and moved to California in 2003. I'm an African american woman and it is so hard to get a black man around here. Most are either gay or are dating white women. I have no problem with interacial relationships or gay relationships because where I come from everyone dates everyone and I like it like that, but it seems that most black guys have a lot of animosity towards black women out here. I'm not one that breaks out in an attitude or am loud and obnoxious. I'm very positive and always cheerful. I do anything and everything for the ones I love, but I still receive cold shoulders from black guys when I'm out. Now in my past I have never really had great relationships with any of the black men that are in my life, but that doesn't make me bitter towards them. I still love my African American brothers, because I still see the positive effect that they have on this earth. I just want to know how other people feel about thi
2007-02-13 07:11:25 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When you are new in town things seem that way..sit back and wait for them to surface and you will see they will come.... and Please Please weed out the strays a good one will always sit back to see your reactions but the mad dogs will approach you first... it never fails I am going to tell you what they called me FRESH MEAT.... all dogs come running first...
2007-02-13 07:22:06 · answer #1 · answered by peace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I watch my black lady friends go through the same thing as you. Black people have been through alot. Hang in there and he will notice you. How is your exposure? Go to very positive places like church or to community functions or festivals maybe even a bowling alley. Stay away from the bar or club scene unless you are already dating. Also be a little understated and not too flashy If you dress loud they may think you are loud. Also I have heard from a few black girls that they want to only date outside their race. Maybe the black men's feelings are hurt from that so they just shut you out on a reflex. In any case don't give up.
2007-02-13 07:31:58 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me apologize before I say this. I apologize, but I dont believe you. I think the black guys YOU like are either gay or married. What you are saying is just not true. There are as many black women as there are black men. From experience, black women for the most part, have this "If I Cant Have HIM I Will Be Single For The Rest of My Life" hang ups, on whatever they are hung up on. I've seen alot of good black men over looked. Sorry open your eyes, I am sure they are there.
2007-02-13 08:48:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
California is weird. It can be nice temporarily. I don't know about you, but for me, New York is home, and the strange Cali attitude grows old quick.
When I lived in CA, I grew tired of everyone associating me with the mafia since I'm NY Italian and treating me like an interview rather than a person (thanks a lot sopranos, grr).
I guess that sort of relationship must be "Hollywood in" right now cuz lord knows that everyone in CA is either an actor, model, musician or some sort of "artist".
I think it's just a California thing.
2007-02-13 07:31:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anne 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My husband does...Honeychild! I think you are in a geographical area where being out of the box is the norm.Don't spend your life complaining, comparing and compromising. Be the proud black woman that you are and walk in authority! Place yourself in the right situations and the man will appear. You can always move to the South as one sister suggested. How about Atlanta?
Black men still love black women they are just not as powerful as us and make excuses to not be the husbands and fathers that we need them to be. Good Luck!
2007-02-13 07:25:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
they do but sometimes guys just probably want to try something new because of the bad relationships they've had with other black women. Just try interacial dating yourself don't set standards on color, you'll find a better guy that way
2007-02-13 07:15:49 · answer #6 · answered by butterfly girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you know black women have allot of issues. but i feel black men tend to cross that line do to the fact no matter how hard they try black women are putting them down not all but quite a percentage.and some just prefer white women which is cool.so don't give up on our brother.when you get one show him what you working with in all aspects no what i mean.
2007-02-13 07:23:23 · answer #7 · answered by helen r 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
BRANDy go to north and south carolina. OR GEORGIA or alabama or kentucky. BLACK MEN STILL LOVE BLACK WOMEN around here. ANd if you have a job watch out.
2007-02-13 07:16:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Im really not sure, I am white and I only date black girls. Sorry wish I could be of more help.
2007-02-13 07:15:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
yeah black guys like black gurls you just have to find one where you are and if they want come to you go to them. Keep head up!!!
2007-02-13 07:54:01 · answer #10 · answered by Tika08 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋