Married only 3 years, told from the start it was a bad idea, has been trying to save the marriage for the last 2 years with no effort from partner. Now, the one who is not trying to work on the marriage is supposed to be leaving and wont. Where, morally, does the line lay, and has a moral line already been crossed? There have been NO SEXUAL acts outside the marriage on either end.
2007-02-13 03:55:27 · 12 answers · asked by ocksman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This answer will be different for everybody, but I personally UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES would get involved with somebody who still lived with their wife. It's a prescription for heartache. If the wife were to see her husband going out with another woman, she might very easily decide to begin making the effort she had theretofore refused to make. And where would that leave me? Out in the cold. No thanks.
Once one partner moved his or her stuff out of the marital home, I would consider dating the man, but only in very rare circumstances. I would absolutely have to believe with every fiber of my being that he was the love of my life to even think about wading into the middle of such a messy situation. I'd still say that the odds of doing so were pretty slim, even under those optimal circumstances.
It wouldn't be until a year or two after the divorce papers had been signed that I would treat a new divorcé as I would any other single/unmarried man. I'd let him get the rebound/transitional woman/women out of the way first.
P.S. If she won't leave and you're sure it's over, you should think about leaving. I don't know how that will affect your rights in the state where you live, but you should look into it.
Good luck.
2007-02-13 04:04:30 · answer #1 · answered by kcbranaghsgirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
being separated doesn't mean you are available, you have to regain dignity and also let the past heals itself before entering into another realtionship. your heart will dictate when will u be ready again, because we cannot teach our hearts we just follow them. But try to work out your marriage first because i think its not marred, somehow it only needs maturing, and understanding, separation sometimes is not the best solution it only worsens everything.
you might want to consider everything, beside three years is long enough for you to be assured of your partner.
2007-02-13 04:08:55 · answer #2 · answered by Mr Philippines 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If don't wait until after the divorce to be with someone you could jeopardize everything before its all said & done with b/c then she can get you for adultry & not irreconcilable differences.
3 yrs is a lot of time you know.. & just as long as you know you tried then thats all you can do.
Good luck & I hope it will work out well for both parties involved.
2007-02-13 04:09:14 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not consider either available until they were divorced. That of course is just me, but I want to know that someone has all their baggage taken care of before I enter into a relationship with them. It is nothing against them.
2007-02-13 03:59:58 · answer #4 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when the divorce is final thats when u become available. but not until then. Have u 2 tried counsling? It might help to save ur marrige.
2007-02-13 03:59:52 · answer #5 · answered by biggest_duke_fan_ever@yahoo.com 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The married person becomes available when the divorce is final.
2007-02-13 03:59:14 · answer #6 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you sure there has been no sexual acts on the outside with your partner?
to answer your question, if you are seperated and it seems useless trying to save the marriage, i think it's ok, for both parties to see other ppl.but this is something both parties should discuss, just so they know you seeing someone and vice versa
2007-02-13 04:04:25 · answer #7 · answered by gustine_girl98 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Leave the situation...be honest about it. And when you are living someplace else...and have let your partner know it is over...then you can date again. Honesty is the key...nothing hidden.
2007-02-13 03:59:37 · answer #8 · answered by rose 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You better run before you get stuck paying Alimony. Especially if you're in CALIFORNIA. Maybe she'll pay you alimony.
2007-02-13 04:00:36 · answer #9 · answered by BroHam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were always available, you were jus away on vacation and now are back. Welcome brother, Janet was looking for you
2007-02-13 04:00:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋