This is a list of rules that guys wished women knew?

Question

Rules For Women
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This is a list of rules that guys wished women knew...

(In response to the popular "A Woman's 50 Rules for Men")

1. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.

2. Don't cut your hair. Ever.

3. Don't make us guess.

4. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

5. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.

6. He's never thinking about "The Relationship."

7. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.

8. Dogs are better than cats.

9. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

10. Shopping is not everybody's idea of a good time.

11. Anything you wear is fine. Really.

12. You have enough clothes.

13. You have too many shoes.

14. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.

15. Your brother is an idiot.

16. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

17. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

18. Share the bathroom

19. Share the closet.

20. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

21. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

22. Nothing says 'I love you' like sex in the morning.

23. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

24. Check your oil.

25. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

26. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

27. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

28. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.

29. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

30. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

31. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

33. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not both.

35. Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

36. Don't make 50 rules when 36 will do.

Answer 1

These are the real rules:
1. The female always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at any time, without prior notification to the male.
3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the female suspects the male knows some or all of the rules she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female seems to be wrong it is because of a misunderstanding caused by something the male did or said, which was wrong.
7. If rule 6 applies, the male must immediately apologize for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The female may change her mind at any time.
9. The male must never change his mind without express, prior, written consent from the female.
10. The female has the right to be angry or emotionally upset at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or emotionally upset.
12. The female must not let the male know whether she wants him to become angry or emotionally upset.
13. Any attempt to document the validity of these rules could result in bodily harm to the person attempting such documentation.
14. If the female has PMS, all the rules are null and void, at her discretion- see rules 1, 2, 5, and 8.

Answer 2

True! True! how True. I am still laughing aloud and will have to share them with the wife - "and then there was the couch"

Answer 3

That's cute...but I like kitties:)

Answer 4

Haha great stuff!! And Periwinkl... SHUT THE HELL UP

Answer 5

i have to say that was pretty good. lol

Answer 6

heheheheee.

Answer 7

HAHAHAHA!!!!