my lame boyfriend?

Question

ive been with my fella for 5 months,i find him attractive and i think he likes me too but recently he's bein doin my head in,he has a high powered job and i just trudge along n am quite happy with what im doin,recently i feel he's been lookin down on me,he said i need to ge a job where i wear asuit as it'l make me feel more worthy,im not materialistic n dont care about them things,he also never calls when he says he will which can go on for days`this winds me up and he'l go out with his mates but wont go out with me,its my birthday coming up n i have to drag him out,ive tried talking to him but he says im too sensitive and i think too deep,am i out of my league?

we have a long distance relationship i see him like every 2 - 3 weeks as it is,he's always working,i know he wouldnt cheat he's far too busy,he reckons he says these things as he thinks i can do better and need to be pushed,he wants me to do well,but i find it patronising,we both have the same upbringing and he's not stuck up at all,he just assumes he's always right and i need to be pushed to my potential otherwise ill regret it,is he the 1 who needs help?

Answer 1

It sounds to me as though he is trying to change you into something you're obviously not,You mentioned that you find each other attractive,and thats fine at first,but you haven't mentioned what else,if anything you have in common,You said you've tried talking to him,i would offer him an ultimatum im afraid,he wont mind if he cares about you,or try a temporary seperation,i know that can be hard,but if he loves you he will dismiss this right away,if he agrees then you know where you stand and you have offered him the easy way out,hope it works out for you.

Answer 2

i don't believe in all of this 'out of my league' stuff. if a relationship is meant to be, then it should be able to cross over any social / racial / religious differences. this guy sounds to me as though he likes to make himself feel important. why on earth does he place so much importance on u getting a job that requires u to wear a suit ? clothes don't make a person - and anyone who judges a person's worth on whether or not they wear a suit must be pretty shallow. as for not calling when he's promised to, well, that's just not on ! again, i think this guy is on a bit of a power trip - he likes to keep u dangling, he likes to control u. PLEASE - move on - i know u find him attractive on the outside, but from what u have said, the real him is pretty ugly, and i think u will realise that for yourself after the novelty of the relationship wears off. at the start of a relationship most people all willing to put up with more cr*p than they would normally, mainly because our emotions cloud our judgement. the thing that worries me the most with u and this guy is that if u let him keep on doing this to u, he's gonna damage your self worth and confidence, and he has no rights to do that. you are a warm, genuine, sensitive person. if he doesn't appreciate u, find someone else that does !

Answer 3

He sounds like a right looooooser, ditch him, he obviously doesn't think your good enough for him, go and find someone who will appreciate you, wearing a suit doesn't make someone high powered, i had to wear a suit in my last job and all I did was sell furniture a muppet could do that but I did earn £27k working part time but it was nothing to do with the suit it was because I was a good sales person, if your happy in your job dont dare leave it, jobs you are happy in can be hard to find, materialistic things are nice but they aren't the be all and end all, Good luck in whatever you decide

Answer 4

I can't understand how you can wast your time on a person like that. There are some many nice people out there that are alone. Give I nice man a brake this Valentines season and dump your lame boyfriend. You should have no problem finding a good date.

Answer 5

But seriously your birthday and you had to drag him out? Even if you've only been together 5 months, he should've done something nice for your birthday...dump him and find someone else...think of this line from a song

"What kind of man would treat his women so cold?
Treat you like you're nothing, when you're worth more than gold."

Answer 6

What an idiot. Get rid. He obviously doesnt have much in the way of feekings for you or he wouldnt treat you in this way.
You will find somebody that loves you and makes you truly happy with.
He will wake up one morning to find he has nothing but his bank balance to keep him warm at night

Answer 7

Why in the international would you opt for him lower back!!!!???? Are you that insecure and desirous to be treated like a doormat and your emotions no longer respected, it truly is what he did, that you would enable him lower back into your existence. in case you 2 did not obviously split, you do not pass off assumption that you probably did and then date somebody else. If he cared about you he would have realized for efficient the way you felt and the position you 2 stood on your relationship. i think you'd be fairly and probable embarrass your self in case you attempt to get him lower back.

Answer 8

Girrrrrrrl, think of it as him not being on your level. Sorry he is not as cool and down to earth as you seem. It is not worth the trouble. It sounds to me as if he needs to get off of his high horse! It is a shame that he can't accept you for who you are. You do not need him on your b-day....he sounds like the type to ruin your happiness. Celebrate your b-day with close friends and people who love you.Drop that zero and get with a REAL MAN who ADORES you and WORSHIPS the ground you walk on and the clothes you wear to work!

Answer 9

Well theres a complete lack of respect he has for you which would have me running for the hills !...He deliberately makes you feel like you arent good enough for him.He seems to think he's a good catch but he so obviously is not.Get rid of the idiot.

Answer 10

U are limiting yo self to much.if u want such a man 4 keeps go ahead but do yo self a favour,get yo self a real man then u will know what u bn missing.