im soo confuse..dunno what is happening
A-24 y.o=my girlfriend since 8 yrs ago; hot tempered,always mad at me, expect me to be perfect, put all her problems to me, nag all the time, hurt my feeling everytime, always fight, ego,abuse me emotionally, disrespectful, dominant, already discuss abt this.
however; she is matured, confident, treat me good when she's in the mood, firm,love me
B- 23y.o=another girl who comes to my life 3 mnths ago; bit childish-always cheerfully like a little girl, not firm in decision,
however, she seems to really understands me, accept me as i am, charming, cute, modest-but sometimes too humble, softhearted, love me,
i love them both,
i know i cant live with A as my wife, but i have so much beautiful memories with her, and i still love her.
should i continue with A although im hurt everyday and she become a queen ctrl?
or try new relation? what if im really miss my ex? would the feeling fade away with respect to time?
please help me
2007-02-12 20:12:14 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
This is what you need to do. 1) Stop dating both women. 2)Go out and meet some new people. G/f A is taking you for granted and love is not really there if all she can do is hurt you and fight with you. G/f B is not ready to get married as she still needs to grow up. You like her because she is so different from A. Get away from both and learn who you are then you will be ready to form a permanent relationship. Most men are not ready to settle down until around 30 so take your time.
2007-02-12 22:50:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Woah. What a question. FIRST thing I thought was I sure hope you don't marry either of them! You DO NOT need to be married. That is serious business, my friend. You are already having problems with A, so you start seeing B? B seems good right now, but this is such a new relationship. You know that high feeling you get from new love? It's FAKE. It doesn't wear off for about three years. That is why people are always saying that marriage is not always about love but just about living with someone. Think about that. Personally, I don't want to be in a marraige without love and I believe it is possible to have love in your marraige forever, but it is A LOT of work. You have to develope good habits and conversational skills with that person for a long time, and be good to each other. It seems like A is making you crazy. And if she wasn't what are you doing fishing around and finding B for? B sounds a little "too good to be true" and they usually are. And what are you doing thinking about something as serious as marriage for when you are not even sure if you are in love and can have a life with someone. My advice, don't be with either of them. Take a break and be by yourself for six months and see how you like that. And as far as time is concerned, you got all the time in the world. Don't worry about time. Things fall in to place. I think love can go beyond time and space. And getting proffessional help is not a bad idea either. Maybe they can help you figure out what you really want to know, and help you get to know yourself better.
2007-02-13 06:10:32 · answer #2 · answered by ladybug 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need some space. You've been dateing Girl A since you were 18? Girl A sounds way too domineering to be a good wife, you will be in divorce court in short order.
Girl B sounds to ditzy
I would tell Girl A that you need space-do this in a public place, but privately-like a restuarant so she doesn't make a scene. I would tell her exactly what you wrote here.
Date other people-Girl B if you want.
But it sounds like you have not had a lot of experience-play the field-but do it safely-you know what I mean.
26 is young-don't make a life changing mistake. Meet more women. Chances are Mrs. Right is out there for you.
2007-02-13 04:23:05 · answer #3 · answered by TommyGirl869 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, I think you have already made a choice. Apparently this first woman (A) wasn't satisfying you so you allowed yourself to have feelings for (B). Perhaps, B seems like a dream girl, because she is the opposite of A. Look at it this way... B isn't making you happy, she just doesn't. So without thinking about it you found B and she seems to make you pretty satisfied, but you'll never know if she'll satisfy you more until you make her your one and only. A deserves the truth. Tell her the truth, but be mindful of her feelings. Let her know straight up that you care for her, but you don't think that you complete her. Don't point out her mistakes, but let her understand that you think perhaps she would be happier with someone that would understand her better and who can concur with the her independance. Then, you need to tell B the truth as well. You need to let her know that she wasn't your only "friend", but that you have ended the other relationship to just be with her. Thing is unless you are 1000% sure that B is the one for you, then you may have this same situation again. You need to decide exactly what you want in a women, details and then don't get serious with someone that doesn't fit your idea. For ex. if you don't want someone who smokes don't date someone that says they are quitting, because in fact that still are smoking. Do you understand what I mean? If you need more help please email me. I don't mind. Good luck!
2007-02-13 05:59:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would go with B.Seems like B makes you really happy.Yes A will be hurt and it's always expected to miss someone after a 8 year relationship break up.It will take a little time to heal.Espically if you have someone to help you.After some time try making new memories with B.That might help you out a little.Good Luck!
2007-02-13 04:20:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
WOW!! thats a difficult one hey!
well firstly if u doubt marriage - dont go through with it. marriage is a forever till eternity relationship, and if u doubtin whether u shud be with A forever then you shouldnt. yes u may love her like crazy but u gotta be completely inlove with that person and wanna spend the rest of your life with that person to marry them.
no doubt, you will really miss A if you leave her. it will be a while but think about your well being. do you deserve the way you bein treated? do wanna be treated like that till you 50? lol. think about yourself first before you make a commitment so deep. and lastly, you'll always find love again. it might be in the next 5mins or month but it'll come - and who knows, it might be the girl who u can see youself growin old with.
2007-02-13 04:48:43 · answer #6 · answered by !simply annoyed! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid off A if she is this bad before you are married! after your life will be HELL and do you really think you deserve to be treated that way?
B.. You like because she is the opposite of A and it's feels nice to have someone nice to you. Get rid of B too sweet
You my friend need to get your life sorted be by yourself and stop attracting women like this.
Whats wrong with being by yourself seeing girls but forget about the relationship bit have fun with them.
Sounds like you have baggage you need to off load can't do that while your trying to please someone else.
Please just don't do A scary. 26yro male should be out there having fun travel leave the marriage thing till latter.
2007-02-13 04:31:56 · answer #7 · answered by shiraz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Discuss your feelings with your current girlfriend first. Have everything put out in the open. Even about the 23 year old. She deserves to know. Ask her if you both could try harder to work on the rough edges. And that you are considering to take the BIG STEP with her if she does.
2007-02-13 04:21:34 · answer #8 · answered by sk|TTLes™ 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I find myself in a situation like yours. In my experience, I chose A and I paid the price. The bi-polar bit gets tiresome after awhile. When a person is that angry and abusive, they will NOT CHANGE. This will make you very very miserable in the later years. A's purpose in life is to make men unhappy. GET RID OF HER NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!!!!!
2007-02-13 04:24:30 · answer #9 · answered by ookaninam2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just calm down and wait awhile dude!
Who said you have to get married at 26 years old?
Give it some more time!!! Meet some new people!
2007-02-13 04:18:51 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋