Worried about my daughter's relationship with her Grandpa?

Question

I recently got married and I am pregnant. I'm due in March, but I'm having some problems with my dad and step mom. They were against my marriage and my pregnancy. They wanted me to have an abortion and after it was too late for abortion, they insisted on adoption. I lived with them for my senior year in high school and visited summers and winters before that.
I moved to my mom's house and my step mom admits that she "hates" my mom while she hardly knows her.
My step mom called my great grandma(who is very hard to please) on my mom's side and told her I was an ungrateful whore. They are telling my little sister similar things. They won't talk to me. I don't know what to do. I love my dad very much and I think most of the dirty work is being done by my step mom.
I've tried talking to them about it, but they won't listen. I want my daughter to know her grandpa, but I don't want her to be exposed to my step mom's negative attitude toward me. How would you handle the situation?

Colleen--Young children are very impressionable. I used to get confused when people said bad things about people I loved and it really upset me. Now that I'm older I ignore things like that, but as a young child it was very upsetting. Obviously you don't understand.

Answer 1

Personally I wouldnt have anything to do with the woman. Even while pregnant as I think that babies can feel the vibes from people even inside the womb.
Does he know his wife is like this to you?
Call your Dad and explain about his wife and how it hurts you and your concerns about the negative influence she will have once your daughter is born. If you have to, tell him he will only be able to see the baby if he comes to your house without his wife.

I'm so sorry you are in that situation. But its best not to let her get to you as you have a baby to worry about and dont need the extra stress.
Sorry I just reread your question and you said "they", is your Dad actually a part of this too? Then try and talk to him when he is alone, if he is still in her grip then tell him flat out he cant have anything to do with you or the baby. After the baby is born and he misses out on seeing his grandbaby and just hears about her from other people he may grow some balls and be able to tell his wife to shut up. It sounds like she is just jealous of you.

Sorry if this hasnt been very helpful. And if they are going to be that horrible than you and your husband and baby are much better off without them in your life. Your baby will be fine as long as you and your husband love her. He ( your Dad) will be the one missing out.
Good Luck

Answer 2

Mmm I've had a similar problem. My step mom sometimes annoys me a bunch. I'm only a freshman though hehe so its not that big of problems but she is never home and my dad is stationed in iraq so i know what you're going through this is what I do...

Talk to my dad in private w/o step mom knowing... your dad should love you and will be more accepting if he doesn't have a witch next to him casting an evil spell :P anyways if that doesnt work out then I'm sorry I wouldn't know what to do...

Answer 3

Invite your father over for dinner on a weekly basis. Explain to him your feelings about his wife's attitude so that he will leave her at home. OR tell him that you would like to share special time with just him and your daughter during these visits. I COMPLETELY understand the whole family problem issues lol. It's rough. Good luck.

Answer 4

What are you worried about YOUR reputation with your daughter so much for? IF what your stepmother has to say has not truth to it why does it matter what she says? Your daughter is your daughter are you afraid that you've raised a child who can be easily influenced? Your daughter knows the truth about you so what you have to fear about your stepmother is unfounded. So you have to decide do you REALLY want your daughter to have a relationship with her grandfather or are you going to allow what your stepmother says pevent it?