Ten points for the funniest story you can think of?

Answer 1

A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00. When the postal authorities received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the President. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read:

>>> Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Washington, DC, and those crooks deducted $95.00 in taxes.

Answer 2

2 3 9+11+2001= 23 2/3= .666
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Answer 3

My brother is deaf. He was born deaf but has successfully managed to fake a lot of people into thinking he can hear. Except for one time, back when I was about 19 years old, he was 17. We were both at a beer party. We were all buzzing on beer watching Pink Floyd's the Wall. I was sitting on a very long couch next my soon-to-be fiance, and my brother was sitting at the far end of the couch. The couch was positioned in the middle of the living room or den, not set against any kind of wall. My brother had a beer in his hand and he was fixated on the TV. A few minutes goes by and a good-looking 21 year old woman sets on the back of the couch. She sat her butt on the backrest of the couch and twisted her torso so that she could talk to my brother.
She was talking to him and putting her hand on his shoulder.
Now, remember, I said he was pretty good at faking people into believing that he can hear. So I motioned to him in sign-language asking him if he wanted me to tell the woman that he was deaf. He signed back me, "hell no!"
As she was talking to my brother, he just kept nodding his head in agreement acting like he understood her. She leaned closer to him and she said in a very loud voice, "ARE YOU SERIOUS?"
and my brother just nooded yes, again. She got really pissed off and walked away angry. I signed over to him and asked what the hell just happend. He signed back that he didn't know.
The next day, I saw the guy who was throwing the beer party. He asked me why my brother was such a jerk toward the woman. I told the guy that my brother was deaf. Just then the guy started to laugh and said, "Oh man! that explains why she got so upset. She was asking him if he tought that she had a really big nose."

Answer 4

Long before we had kids:

My husband and I went into a liquor store to buy beer for a party we were gonna have. (he had a black tahoe at the time) when we came out of the store, we went to get into his truck and I noticed the tire was low. So I kept kicking the tire..i'm not sure why. Then he opened the door to get in and he's all: why's my car so dirty? he starts picking-up the trash, like kleenex and stuff, from the floor of the truck and throwing it onto the back seat, we look back there and there's a baby seat..uh. We don't have a baby! It was NOT OUR TRUCK! We were parked two spaces over...it was ANOTHER black Tahoe! Can you imagine waiting in line at the liquor store and you look outside and some chick is kicking your tires and another guy is getting into your truck!! It was hysterical!

Answer 5

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