Over a year ago I started dating a man and we fall in love. But he was officially married, kept promising to get divorced (took a year). He is friends with his ex-wife (she left him) and I become untrusting to him and jealous of her. Many fights later he kept saying he loves me, promised not to talk to her. Couple weeks ago I saw them fun chat. Scandal followed and I gave ultimatum. His only reply: I am too jealous, need treatment and learn control emotions (he likes attention, he is friends with his other ex who is nice girl I have no problem with). I know he loves me, but I cannot understand why she is more important.
Also I wrote ex email (dont want her hate me), that I was not comfortable in situation and needed some time calm down. Her respond: it was pointless to even ask him to stop talking, they are always be friends, but at least assured of no physical contact with him.
Also IF he actually comes back, what kind of proofs can show me he is not lying again? Love him 2much
2007-02-12 16:21:33 · 6 answers · asked by Ania 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
P.S. She left him several months before he met me for another man - I am not the reason they separated. No kids involved.
2007-02-12 16:31:22 · update #1
Tried to talk with him nicely many times, he simply ignores. I was always loving, supporting, was too patient for long time. Also he is too macho for admitting his flirting is unappropriate.
2007-02-12 16:49:36 · update #2
I think you need to sit down and have a chat with him. Make sure that there are no distractions, and make sure you don't have this talk when you two have just gotten in a fight or just got done fighting.
Talk to him and tell him how you are feeling. Make sure you are not screaming at him or even accusing him of things. Just tell him how you feel and how the things he is doing are hurting you. Talk to him and make him feel what you are feeling, let him know that you are in love with him and want these fights to end. Let him know why you are feeling that "she" is more important.
Maybe you can work out an agreement, but more importantly, he needs to make his own decision on what he does. Once he knows exactly how you feel, if he continues to disrespect your feelings, then I would move on. Maybe when you have this discussion you will discover he still has feelings for her, or maybe that it WAS just harmless chit chat.
Whatever it is, remember to stay calm and make sure he understands where you are coming from, not to accuse him of anything or get angry with him.
2007-02-12 16:39:24 · answer #1 · answered by MissDivine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding ME!!! If he had an affair with you on his wife he will have an affair with someone else on you. It may not be his current wife but it will be with someone. You are answering your own questions!!! You know the man loves attention from women and keeps in touch with a LONG LINE OF EX's. He says he loves you but.......in the famous word of Tina Turner.....WHATS LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT!!!!!!!! If he really loved you he would do EVERYTHING necessary to make sure you were happy and content. Begin to let go and move on you deserve to have a man's total and complete heart!! If you found him you can find someone else. Don't settle for this half hearted love LIFE IS TO SHORT
2007-02-12 16:38:39 · answer #2 · answered by sayj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's not always that he could be trying to get back with his ex...but there are good signs of it...you should just let it be...&& if it was really meant to be then the lord will make it happen one way or another...so just sit back && let him realize which one is a better choice....you should try to become real good friends with the ex wife...then maybe you wouldn't be so worried all the time...
GOD BLESS !!!
2007-02-12 16:27:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They might be married or in bad marriage when you came into their marriage but the truth is you broke up their marriage.You will also feel that way no matter what no matter with who.Hes doing to you what he did to his ex wife and it will be the same way
2007-02-12 16:26:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he rushed into a relationship too soon- i am separated for 3 1\2 yrs and i did not rush into a relationship
2007-02-12 16:36:01 · answer #5 · answered by manblind1969 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are taking a cruise down the Nile -- in total denial.
2007-02-12 16:26:02 · answer #6 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋