Me and my bf broke up three months ago. I got sick of his crap and left. Found myself a place , with little money and had to endure not having a bed for over a month. I ate little food and often took food from my gradmothers cabinets to get by. After a month my bf said that he realized that he did somethings wrong and that he was going to work on them, I decided to give him and I another try because he is not a bad guy and has many good qualities. But now that we are back together the same problems are occuring. I don't know what to do. On one hand he is a good guy , but on the other I am not very happy. I am happy at times, but not mostly. We fight over silly things, and I think it's mainly because he hates his job so he comes home and takes it out on me. I am crying too much, but he says that I need to get over silly things and let go, how long should I let go? Or am I overreactiong? What makes a good relationship?I'm lost on what to do.
2007-02-12 15:56:44 · 13 answers · asked by brokenbutterfly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If he said he If he said that he was going to change, and he hasn't - tell him that he needs to change or you guys are done. Give him another week or so to try and work on things; but don't waste too much time on someone who isn't right for you.
2007-02-12 16:01:23 · answer #1 · answered by aSchway 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's immature. A good relationship is something that is healthy and constructive. You guys should be happy inside the relationship. The guy should be wearing the pants and be understandable. It's alright to have a petty quarrel once in a while, but from what I am reading, he's immature. You already gave him another chance. If the problem happen over and over again, you have to let go, you don't deserve that kind of person. Sometimes good persons could become worst because both persons are not compatible to each other. You guys should talk about this problem. And if it's not workable, you guys should move on. It's not worth the relationship. It takes two to tango.
2007-02-12 16:12:42 · answer #2 · answered by Confuse_Guy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not worth the heartache, pain and suffering. If he has issues and is taking it out on you then leave. That's the kind of stuff that married people go through but they are more obligated to work it out. You shouldn't be going through this and you're single. Maybe you two just really need to go your seperate ways for good. You mentioned that you struggled while being on your own so invest more into your own life rather than a dead end relationship. Go back to school, learn new skills and gain more experience. Improve you. If he's a good guy then he'll work harder to be even better...without you. Meanwhile, don't spend your days and nights crying anymore. You're going to be old before your time. Life is short...enjoy it.
2007-02-12 16:09:58 · answer #3 · answered by VWoman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a very good question because I am having the same issues with my man... I can say one thing atleast I talked to him about it and we been fighting over silly things and some serious ones but he like your guy has many good qualities... so I am watching your answers because maybe it will help my relationship. I know WE SHOULDNT GIVE UP ON THEM BECAUSE OF THEIR FEW BAD QUALITIES Because every relationship has its faults.... I am trying to figure out if I should just learn to deal with it and ignore it or try hard to change him and it back firing in my face... so who knows =/ I say do what your heart tells you and usually your heart leads you in a good way. Right?
2007-02-12 16:02:50 · answer #4 · answered by TOokieTook 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a relationship similar to this. It turns out He was so depressed, came home from work angry and just basicly ignored me. I started thinking I didn't need to be told I was pretty and my self esteem was so low. I forgot what a real man was. I would say you need to learn it on your own, but sweetie i feel for you!! I mean how many chances can a person give, 1 turns into 2, 2 into 5, 5 into 10, 10 into 100, and then before you know it your married to him :(. Follow your heart and gut, I wish you all the luck!
2007-02-12 16:04:58 · answer #5 · answered by K McD 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well let me tell you something, some people regradless of the sex gender will never change and its hard to realize that from someone you care about so but it is soo true. Im going threw a simliar situation with my girl. Me and her have broken up so many time but our problems are still there ( 3 years).. what im saying is that you need to move on or be halfway happy... If you are going to walk away you need to do it all the way tho... Good luck
2007-02-12 16:03:49 · answer #6 · answered by Unknown 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How is he a good guy? How is he a bad guy? Make a pro / con list... or ask a friend that knows both of you to give an honest outlook on the relationship - if they say you can do better - then do better - or if you really care to work things out with him - post a reminder of the things that you would like to workout in the relationship - on the fridge or something.
2007-02-12 16:02:34 · answer #7 · answered by Channel T 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to endure the tough times to maintain a relationship . Try asking him how he feels about work in order to attempt to resolve what maybe eating at him. The advice that always stuck out to me is the pet peeves that you dislike now will be the main thing that drives you crazy in the long run. Take a long look at each annoyance to determine is it Worth looking the other way.
2007-02-12 16:10:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you guys should space apart, be friends. He has some qualities that make you upset and thats not good for either one of you. He may come around eventually and change his ways, or that just might be the type of guy he really is. Either way, you dont need that, you are obviously a strong person and that will take you a long way! Good luck
2007-02-12 16:04:26 · answer #9 · answered by Heath B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your bf sound like me and my best friend, we always get into fights over the silliest little things.Her and I are not friends any more, but we don't like hate each other and we still talk sometimes. I think you should tell him when he makes you mad, and if he does not at least try to stop you are going to brake up with him.You are to good for him, and he is not worth it if he is dumping on you.
2007-02-12 16:25:31 · answer #10 · answered by samantha m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋