Why do people keep lecturing people on being married before having children? Honestly why does it matter? As long as a child has two loving parents then whats the big deal? Married couples can easily separate as non married couples. And also there is a thing called Freedom of Religion, and I know in most religions it is a sin to have a child without being married, but what about those who do not believe in that? When people are trying to conceive and are asking for tips, give them the tips, not telling them to be married first. God LOVES EVERYONE and FORGIVES everyone. Isn't that what we are taught?
2007-02-12 12:25:18 · 19 answers · asked by mrs.russell 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Coalie it has EVERYTHING to do with what I just listed. What makes you think a marriage couple vs a nonmarried couple have a better enviornment?? Loving parents are loving parents married or not. Like I said before, married couples can just as easily separate as nonmarried couples. (and just as a fye, I do not mean 16 year old couples having kids, I am meaning these people who have lived together for years and love each other and want to share the bond of love, and create and raise a child together.)
2007-02-12 12:39:46 · update #1
I am engaged, my fiance and I are getting married next August, I am just defending all these men and women who are getting criticized or punished for bringing beautiful babies in the world.
2007-02-12 12:56:32 · update #2
i believe in living together for a couplefew years and see if you are compatible to live with each other. if having a bay is in the cards then who really cares if the parents are married. is it bater to be married, have a baby then divorce or to be in a loving relationship with child. god knows what we truly feel. marriage doesn't change that.
2007-02-12 12:32:22 · answer #1 · answered by mark28269 1 · 1⤊ 6⤋
I personally don't feel religion should play a role in whether a child is born when it's parents are married or not. But a couple who is living together and has been together for years and are obviously in love and are not willing to get married...there might be a problem there. If you can't commit to each other how can you commit to a baby. I think it is better for the parents to be married. My fiancee is technically a bastard child. And her parents do not get along at all, they don't even sleep in the same bedroom. They can't even stand each other for more than 30 minutes. If you are with the person you want to have a family with..why not tie the knot. If a couple can not do that then they shouldn't start a family in the first place.
2007-02-12 22:54:40 · answer #2 · answered by Maverick 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, God does love everyone, but to an extent. What about those who purposely disobey his commands? Like those who killed his son Jesus, Hitler, Those he destroyed in the flood during Noahs time. There is such a thing as unforgivable sin. Many people get confused when they say "God is a God of love, and forgiveness." God is also a God of Justice, and of war. He will defend his people against those who are harming them, and he will defend his name. Just like he has done in the past. In order for our sins to be forgiven, we must wholeheartedly do his will to our best ability.
God knows that we are imperfect, and make mistakes.
Because of this fact, he has given us the bible as a guide book for our lives. God created marriage for the reproduction of child to fill-up the earth. Also so that man would not have to be alone. Marriage is a security for the child, the child will have both parents to care for them emotionally, and to provide the needs for the child. Each parent can provide a different skill for the child. Together, husband and wife, have a strong bond, which the child will learn and appreciate.
Now today most children are not brought up in a home with both parents. Have you ever wondered how those children feel?
Most of them wish they had a mother or a father around. I know this to be a fact, for I was one of those children. I wanted my real father around. I was upset in some ways that my mother chose to have me with out a father in my life. This I have not wanted for my kids, so I made sure I was married first, before I had kids. Gladly, I can say, "my Husband and I have been married for almost 17 years."
If you to choose to be un-married, that is your choice, and you have free will to do so. But please think of the children who are involved in this. You have made this decision, but what would your children decide if they had a voice now?
I think that God new what he was doing when he created the first human marriage in The Garden of Eden.
You may not agree with this comment, but I appreciate this oppurtunity to express my views, and that of what I learned about God's views. I hope you don't get angry at the people who have made the choice to be married. For this is a good choice, especially now in this world of so much problems, wars, and broken families. I'm glad you care enough to have a child, congratulations on making that step, but please remember the greatest gift you could give your child is a legal united family.
2007-02-12 20:52:27 · answer #3 · answered by woman of steel 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You are right when you say God loves everyone but God forgives those who ask for forgiveness and turn away or repent from their sin. You can't expect to be forgiven for doing something you know God doesn't approve of and continuing to do it day after day. If a friend came up and punched you in the face and then said "Oh, sorry" and then did again every day after that would you really buy the apology? Why should God be expected to put up with blatant disobedience? He laid out the rules for our good not His and if we choose to screw up our lives that's the choice we make, but I DO NOT have to help anyone make a terrible mistake and bring more messed up kids into this world.
2007-02-12 20:38:16 · answer #4 · answered by tallgirl 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
The reason I would give is commitment.Having children without commitment just seems to be a bad ideal.If you love each other then whats wrong with showing it by a binding contract.You would for car,house ect...What name do the kids take?Also it is so much easier to walk out without the commitment.I have had children in and out of marriage and I find that in marriage with the commitment there is a difference on how you relate to each other and the children.I gave my child out of marriage my name.
2007-02-12 20:42:50 · answer #5 · answered by tinker 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Yes, He also tells us to obey. There are very few things that He actually asks of us if you think about it. What I don't understand is how people get so upset and tied in knots over just doing the few things that He asks. He gives us unconditional love. Unconditional. The least we can do is try to be the best that we can be.
It's really not too much to ask. We all sin and fall short of His glory. What matters is that we earnestly try and do what is right. He only wants what is best for us.
2007-02-12 20:30:22 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda H 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Financially, its a hell of a lot safer to have kids after marriage than before....its not nearly as easy to get a divorce as it is to slyly call a moving company and dissapear into the night. Its a hell of a lot easier to get child support out of a husband than it is a boyfriend....i dont care how loving and wonderful this man is now...but if things fall apart...marriage is a set of laws that are there to safeguard women and children...whom TYPICALLY dont earn as much as Dad...if that isnt true for you....fantastic...then you get to ignore the answer....but for all of us who didnt finish college (cuz we got knocked up) or didnt have a great job (cuz we were home caring for the kids) Marriage is a safeguard for when things go wrong...pure and simple
2007-02-12 20:34:31 · answer #7 · answered by motherhendoulas 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
My suggestion is that a couple be friends and enjoy talking to each other. That is the glue that will hold you together, if you can't talk to each other and listen then forget it! When you have a baby sometimes you might have to just sit at home with each other and the tv will get old after a while. And you should live together first to see if you can tolerate each other. As long as the babies best interests are being carefully considered, it should never matter if you are married.
2007-02-12 20:37:35 · answer #8 · answered by Tracy L 3 · 0⤊ 4⤋
It's not a matter of loving or not loving, religion or not. It's just a better enviroment for the child. I have some old friends whose parents were not very healthy with their relationship in the long run because they weren't married. It has nothing to do with anything you just listed
2007-02-12 20:29:15 · answer #9 · answered by Coalie 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Love is all kids need or understand. Ask a young child about marriage and they'll look at you with a blank face. Ask them if mommy and daddy love each other and they will(SHOULD) smile and say yes! Marriage is contract that can be burned or broken in court. I don't believe in god but from what I've always heard is that he loves his children so wouldn't he just be happy you love yours'?
2007-02-12 20:50:02 · answer #10 · answered by lfn132231 1 · 1⤊ 3⤋