The guy I am engaged to bought an engagement ring when he was with his last girlfriend (he bought it close to the end of the two year relationship). He swears it wasnt for her and that she knew he bought it. He said the only reason he bought it was because at the time he had the money and he didnt know if he would have the money to buy and engagment ring when the right girl did come along. I would like to know what both men and women think about this situation. Also do you think it is ok that I asked him to take the ring back and buy one that he picked expecially for me?
2007-02-12 10:43:18 · 16 answers · asked by Little Flower 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Wow. I can see why you might feel kind of hurt and confused. I don't want to judge, because I don't know you or him, but to me the story sounds a little off. I mean, if he had the money to buy one and 'didn't have the right girl', he could have put the money in a bank account or savings and kept it until he found the right girl. I just don't see the logic of buying a ring just to buy a ring...i mean, it could have been years before he found his girl to marry. I absolutey think you made the right move in asking him to return it and buy one just for you. If he takes offense at this, perhaps you need to rethink this thing. You sound as though you really love him and want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but....
I would tell him to get you a new ring and then while you are at it, ask him why he didn't just bank the money until he found the right girl. Good luck, honey.
2007-02-12 10:54:42 · answer #1 · answered by demongelding1@hotmail.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally understand where both of you are comming from. i have been in the jewelry business for years and many men do this. Chances are that if he bought it over 90 days ago no store will take it back. The two of you may want to consider having the diamond put into another mounting. Then the ring will truely be made especially for you. Buying the diamonds is the expensive part and he already has those. You can get whatever mounting you want and it won't cost an arm and a leg.
2007-02-13 01:26:26 · answer #2 · answered by funnyhaha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know many guys (at least straight ones) who willingly go into a jewelry store to buy a ring just for the heck of it, because they had the extra money laying around. It sounds to me like he bought it for his last girlfriend. However, I don't know if taking the ring back will be the solution, the store may not accept the return if he's had it awhile. What you could do is take the diamond out of that ring, and have it reset. I wouldn't make a big deal about his not picking it especially for you, but I'd probably approach it like you really don't like that ring (pick a reason that's plausible), and you'd like to look into changing it. Good luck, that's a very sticky situation he's got you in!! (himself too!)
2007-02-12 11:08:01 · answer #3 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It used to be that a man would buy a ring that he liked to use when he found a girl that he would like to marry. Sometimes it was a family heirloom from a mother or grandmother. It wasnt about the girl picking a huge diamond and gold ring. Its just a symbol between two people. You normally only wear it until the wedding anyway.
If you are so concerned about the ring maybe you should think about if you really like the guy , or are just interested in the stuff he can buy for you.
He wont get much if he tries to return the ring.
2007-02-12 13:15:55 · answer #4 · answered by mark 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is wierd!! Engagement rings are a BIG purchase and really depends on the woman's taste. My Fiancee, when went ring shopping, like a very specific style. She wanted a princess cut diamond with 2 smaller princess cuts. She also wanted white gold.
With that knowledge, I picked out a ring (with my father's help). I could not have foreshadowed the ring she would have wanted. She did not even know until we bagan looking. The ring I though she would have liked would have been a solitare but she did not want that at all.
Oh and couldn't he just put the money into the bank, collct intrest and buy a bigger ring?
2007-02-12 10:55:58 · answer #5 · answered by AntDU 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
before everything, undergo in strategies that the hoop is the 1st of the expenditures while it is composed of getting married. now on your question, see in the journey that your mom has a diamond from a chew of rings she doesnt positioned on anymore, or your grandma or somebody else on your loved ones which you're on the factor of, this would make the hoop plenty greater much less costly and lots greater particular on your female chum. additionally, maximum jewelers comprehend that folk dont have an added $2500-3000 laying around and that they have got fee plans, maximum have no activity for 6 months some, even a 300 and sixty 5 days so which you additionally could make money with no need to pay activity. I dont comprehend if there's a Goodman's the place you reside yet i comprehend they continually have sales and in the event that they see which you're youthful and in love they might provide you a cost wreck and that they are between the few agencies that has one 3 hundred and sixty 5 days no activity financing. solid good fortune!
2016-11-03 07:00:07 · answer #6 · answered by dewulf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he's feeding you a load of crap. What guy randomly buys an engagement ring? If he was concerned about having the money, he should have invested it. How could he have known what kind of ring his future bride would want? He obviously bought the ring for his former girlfriend. If I were you, there is no way I would accept a ring which wasn't selected especially for me!
2007-02-12 10:51:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think he's trying to pawn off this old engagement ring on you. If it was me, I would rather have no ring at all than have a ring with an old relationship attached to it. It's not about a ring, it's about symbolism, and a "second-hand" ring is an unfit symbol for a new relationship. If you feel you must have a ring, go out with him and pick out a new one together.
2007-02-12 10:55:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No man would ever buy a ring unless he was planning to propose, it's just not what they do, he's feeding you this sob story so that you believe him and he does not have to make any effort to choose a ring for you. Yes have him take it back and get his money back (although it is unlikely he will get the same value back) and have him choose a ring that symbolises your relationship, not something he intended for his ex.
2007-02-12 22:58:28 · answer #9 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, this raises a big red flag. No guy buys a ring "in case".
I would give the ring back and not bother asking for a replacement...
2007-02-12 22:56:27 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋