Hi, I am 21 and my boyfriend is 25. Recently he has become distant. Now he says he needs his space because he doesnt know what is wrong. I know he has been text messaging this girl from work a lot. When I ask him about it he says it is nothing and they're just friends because she has a long term boyfriend too. We've been dating and talking about getting married, buying a house, ect for 3 years now. He was very understanding when I needed my space and left him for a month for another guy. He says he loves me and wants to be with me, but he just needs some time right now. When I tried to break up with him 3 times, he begged me to please stop and just give him a couple of days. He says we'll be together but he needs time because he says it is too hard for him to come home because all we do is cry. Does it sound like it is over or does he really just need a few days to clear his head? Any advice would help. Thank you so much!!
2007-02-12 10:01:34 · 14 answers · asked by Confused 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Give him the few days he is looking for.
He gave you some time so you should do the same.
It really can't hurt anything
2007-02-12 10:06:23 · answer #1 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why did you want to break up with him? and why did you leave him for another guy? when you say you need space there should be no other person in the picture. i can understand wanting time to think, but that doesn't mean you go to another guy/girl....that just makes you even more confused. from what i see you don't have a stable relationship and he is scared to lose you but he probably wants to date others too. I think you should both break it off. you are both young. you probably need to find yourselves first before working on a relationship. If you left him for another guy before, I'm sure your man is insecure about your relationship, and maybe you both are still a little imature in the relationship area. it's been said that people usually stay together about a year longer than they really want to because they are scared to be alone or think they are making the wrong decision. Move on. spend some time being single and hanging out with your friends, you have the rest of your life to be in a relationship. you learn from relationships and that only makes the next and next better and better. if you are meant to be you'll find each other, but my guess is you'll both realize that you weren't meant for each other. . . . . .and that's OK!
2007-02-12 10:15:54 · answer #2 · answered by Becky E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ship may have already sailed. I am really sorry, but you may be changing your life too late. Have a talk with her and ask her to be totally honest with you. If she can't be honest when talking to you, tell her to write you a letter that is brutally honest. If it is over, take a little time to grieve the loss of the relationship. But realize that there is life on the other side of "divorce." A book that helped me in the past was "Permanent Partners." You might be able to pick up a copy at the library. Good luck! :)
2016-05-24 02:26:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you have any choice but to give him the space he needs and trust him at his word until he's given you reason not to. If he wanted to break up he had his chances to do so. There's no way to know exactly what he's thinking but he did what you asked when you needed, do him the same courtesy. When he knows what he's trying to resolve with the time apart he'll let you know.
2007-02-12 10:11:46 · answer #4 · answered by menagainstamazoniammasterhood 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'm in the same situation right now... I need time to clear my head... so for me Its not that i dont like her... its just that i'm confused on how i feel... I would give him a few days and i dont think its over at all...
hope i could help at all...
2007-02-12 10:07:31 · answer #5 · answered by Lets GOOOO BUFFALO!!! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems like he needs some space, and since you talked about marriage and a house then he probably is serious with you and does want to do those things with you he just needs time. give him a few days and let him now how you see things.
2007-02-12 10:07:02 · answer #6 · answered by superfreak 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs time to think about what he wants. my bfd did this to me and eventually was split up cos I'd had enough but he realized that i was what he wanted and now we're better than ever. just give him the time he needs if its not meant to work then it will end in its own time. if you love him then give him the space he has asked for and be patient he will come back to you when he's ready.
2007-02-12 10:08:20 · answer #7 · answered by Giggle Angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him the space he's asking for. He did the same for you. If you're meant to be together you will be. If you aren't meant to be together, wouldn't you rather find out now than after you've bought a house together, etc.?
Let him go, if he comes back, he's definitely yours.
2007-02-12 10:07:53 · answer #8 · answered by sassybree1979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he does sound like he needs space..
make sure hes not cheating on you
and dont break up with him YET
with out a reason to break up with him
just sit and relax a little bit
and maybe get your own time too
and just have fun with your friends
or your self.
have fun with out him
and if he is taking toooo long
ask him wuts going on
and if he doesnt tell you
tell him your leaving.
2007-02-12 10:06:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As someone older going through a similar situation right now. Break up with him. Don't torture yourself analyze it. It will save you your dignity & self-respect. You are so young & there will be many, many men who know how they feel about you & never want to let you go. You deserve the world! Don't ever settle. Go luck to you!
2007-02-12 10:08:01 · answer #10 · answered by Amanda80 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋