how do i deal with a trouble child?

Question

i have tried everything...he will not listen. and where he used to listen to ga-ga (my mom) he doesn't anymore. he is extremely stubborn and the total opposite of his brother. he is almost 2. i understand that he is young and is a boy, but my 3 year old has never done anything like this. can you help me???

Answer 1

When a kid that age seems like 'trouble,' it's easy to just shrug our shoulders and say to ourselves "oh well some kids just won't listen"...but you can't give up and don't let yourself believe that.

If he's told to stop doing something and he persists, you HAVE to consistently step in there and insist he stop. He has to know you really mean what you say and you will act on it...every time.

Answer 2

Don't give up and be CONSISTENT. My 3rd child is a boy and he was much more challanging than his sisters in regards to disciplining. There were many times when I would think "Is this child EVER going to get it???" With my girls, after a couple of times in the naughty spot they got the picture and stopped the behavior.... but my son would just keep at it. So, I kept at it..... and you know, he's 3 and is a really good listener now. It just took longer with him. The important thing to remember is ALWAYS give a consequence for the bad behavior---never let it slide. Even when you think it's not working---don't give up. He will get it if you are consistenty make it clear that you will not tolerate that behavior (whatever it may be at that given moment.) He WILL have a consequence whenever he acts out. Really---it is hard to be consistant, but it is SO worth it in the end. My kids are really well behaved...and when they do start to do something I'm not happy about all I need to do is give them a "look" an they stop..... they know I mean business because I ALWAYS follow through, and have from day 1. Your son might be more of a challange, but he'll learn if you keep at it. Just be patient and don't give up! :) Oh, and by the way---I've never spanked them. I don't think is effective or necessary.

Answer 3

I have three kids and they are all very different. My youngest is a boy and was the easiest as a baby, he is now two and a half. Right before he turned two he became alot more difficult. We decided to try time outs even though i thought he was too young and probably wouldn't stay in time out without a big fight. I decided that i would be consistent no matter what. We have a small chair in his room that was "the time out chair".
The first time out happenned when he knocked all of his sister's leapfrog ABC's off the fridge and refused to clean or even help clean them up. He was warned that if he did not clean them up he would have to go to time out. He didn't so i put him in his chair, he cried and got up and i put him back, this happened maybe three times. He sat in time out for three minutes and then he still had to clean up the letters. He did!!!!! He sometimes goes to time out for hitting his siblings. He gets a warning and has to apologize, if he hits or doesn't say i'm sorry, he goes to time out and has to apologize when he comes out. I think that MOST OF THE TIME, when time outs don't work, it is because something isn't consistent or the parents did not establish from the beginning that the process wasn't optional. I was not consistent with my first son and time outs never worked.
Also, there is a book called Family Rules, that is a whole system for how to do things. It isn't about what you should or should not make rules about but, how to enforce the rules you make for your family from young kids to teen agers.

Answer 4

Sounds like he is going through the terrible twos!!!! don't worry it will get better in a year. I would try calmly sitting him down and telling him that he needs to start listening to mommy and daddy or he will get punished. Try using time outs two minutes and then after the time out tell him he was put there because he would not listen and make him apologize to you. as far as your other child never being that way, remember that children are completely different and just thank god that you had one good one!!
hope this helped!!

Answer 5

what kind of trouble do you mean? My 18month is really stibborn but it's just childrens way of pushing their boundaries to see how much they can get away with. You just have to be firm and consistent with whichever method of discipline works for BOTH of you, whether it be a smack on the hand/butt, timeout for 2-3minutes, ignoring his tantrums, taking away treats etc. With my son smacking didn't work as he thought it was a great game so we've learnt that with him we can't discipline him using the same thing he did ie biting him back etc, however timeout works wonders on him as he absolutely hates it and learns really quickly that when he bites scratches pinches etc he will get timeout. All children are very different even with the same parents and what works for one may not work for the other, you have to figure out which discipline method works for which child. When Jarell has tantrums we have tantrums to and he thinks its a game and stops, we used to ignore him which worked on my sister however he could go for hours which i didn't think was healthy. If you choose to smack, make it hard enough so he knows its a smack but not so hard as to leave a mark. Children thrive on knowing what their boundaries are and will keep pushing until you let them know, so just be patient, firm and above all consistent and let other family members know too. Good luck and he is not being naughty and I'm sure he is a lovely little boy! xx

Answer 6

He is almost 2, what do you expect from him?? Not all kids are the same. My daughter is 2 and stubborn and doesn't listen all that well, but I hardly consider her a "trouble child" I consider her normal for a toddler.

Answer 7

Maybe there is a reason he is acting out. Spend some one on one time with him. Since he has an older sibling maybe hes not getting enough attention. Watch SuperNanny, That show has helped me so much understanding that it has a lot to do with me and the things I am doing. Also she has a lot of great ideas for playtime and family time.

Answer 8

being consistent
having clear consequences for any negative actions.
i have two boys and the disciplinary actions taken for each child are according to their age, understanding, and temperament, what works for one child will not work for the other.
Have you given timeouts a try, 2 minutes removed from everyone to think about his choices and his behavior. Be sure to address him before you allow him out and tell him why he was placed their, that if this behavior happens again you will find yourself here again and what behavior you would rather see out of him.
Also be sure to give him praise and positive reinforcement when he is being good and making good choices. We have even went as far as timeout sleeps, when you know they are just tired and not handling stress well send them to take a nap. Good luck! Blessings!

Answer 9

Well sometimes (I dont know if this is the case and I dont know what he is doing) but anyway, sometimes, kids do things to get attention... like if you would be in a store and it would be time to go, but he wouldnt want to... say okay, mommy is leaving with out buh bye, and act like you are walking away and he might/prolly/ will come to you... my mom did that and I went running to her...

that is just an example, but you can relate that to other things.

Answer 10

dont hit him or paddle him. when he starts acting up start taking away his favorite toys. everytime hes good he gets one back. if this doesnt work then start having him sit somewhere alone for about 5 or ten minutes starting when he is quiet and sitting where you want him. but the hitting and hitting with a paddle is not the way to go. or you could start rewarding him with something he likes. tell him if hes good all day you'll make his favoriite snack or something like that. you have to give them a good reason to behave and not be so bratty.