My mom is about is about to kill me. She question every move I make. I have a job, my own car, and I don't ask my parents for money or anything. I'm fixing to turn 21. She tells me what I can do with my car and what I can't do, everytime I go somewhere if it's not resonable she wont let me go! IT'S MY CAR! I PAY THE PAYMENTS, I PUT GAS IN IT! Arrgghhh this is about to drive me crazy! I have talked to them before about this and they won't listen. I'm on the verge of just packing it up and moving on. But I know if I move out it will kill her! But she won't let up.
What would you do?
2007-02-12 07:00:37 · 11 answers · asked by angel2005_2001 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It's called control and it's the most dehumanizing thing a parent can do to their child. And the sad thing? They don't even realize what they are doing, (if they do then it's even sadder). It sounds like your mom is using your car as a huge influence over you and your life and believe it or not, you are giving her the power to do it. You are a legal responsible adult, and you have every right to lead your own life and make your own choices, and she should allow you to do that. You actually answered your own question up there, you may have to move out in order to have your own peace. If talking to your mom hasnt helped in the past, I doubt it will in the future and as long as you let her do this she will continue to control things in your life. It's hard to break patterns like that but if you stand your ground in time things can and will change, but know it will be hard on your mom to let go. She's dont it for a long time, old habits die hard. Just take control...you'll see.
2007-02-12 07:39:21 · answer #1 · answered by Yahoozula 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha, my brother had this problem! And where I say haha you should ready it I AM SO SORRY! Well, here is the thing. You need to sit down with her and explain the situation. That way she makes the decision. Does she let up and let you be a grown up, or does she get hurt by you moving out. Another thought- you will have to move out eventually you know. Maybe sooner rather than later could preserve more of the relationship? Well you know her better than me, but that is my advice. And good luck!
2007-02-12 15:08:02 · answer #2 · answered by Lara S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are old enough to move out on your own and make your own decisions. It will not kill your mother believe me. It sounds like you are doing well even though you are still living at home, you are at least responsible. Now be responsible and make a decision to get your own place. You and mom will have a better relationship once you do this. Everyone will be a lot happier too.
2007-02-12 15:24:51 · answer #3 · answered by devilgal031948 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd say it's time to move out hon, it's time to get your own place.
If you are already independent, have your own job, your own car, then it's time to go. That's part of the problem, she's still treating you like you are her kid (which she will do till you die anyway so get over it lol), but you are ready to be an adult.
If she is supporting you, then that is a different matter alltogether. Until you get on your feet and are steady enough to support yourself, then you must listen to her. Sorry.
2007-02-12 15:51:22 · answer #4 · answered by arewethereyet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are living under your parents' roof for free, they will still have some authority as to what rules you must obey. If it is truly driving you crazy, then I'd set a goal to get out on my own shortly after your 21st birthday. I hope it all works out for you. Your mom might have "empty nest" syndrome for awhile, but she will get over it eventually. You can't stay with them forever, and you talk like you are very responsible.
2007-02-12 15:08:39 · answer #5 · answered by TPhi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why would it kill her if you move out? sounds to me like she's driving ou out.
if you don't want to leave, just do what you want, don't get her to approve it, just come and go as you please, if she asks where you're going or where you've been, just say "nowhere", or "my youth for satan club is having a meeting" or some such nonsense. if she starts giving you the gears, just leave again, let her know that she can't control you. If she doesn't trust you by now, it's her own fault. Good luck!
2007-02-12 15:08:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First let me say that while you are living with someone else you owe them the common courtesy of letting them know when you are going to be in.
"I won't be home tonight"
I'll be in tonight"
thats all nothing more or nothing less
You need to move out.
she will be this way forever
You will probably have a much better relationship with your mother,
get her a cell phone and it will be like you are there.
2007-02-12 15:35:36 · answer #7 · answered by trawet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you are able to manage i would say move out. But you got to understand that some parents just want the best for ther children and they are doing what their parents did not do for them. i know it kinda of hard so i say sit down and let her know what u have decided to do.
2007-02-12 15:24:08 · answer #8 · answered by Tamalee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would move out. You seem like a responsible enough young adult. Let her know that and get out.
2007-02-12 15:04:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're legal-over 18, move out.
2007-02-12 15:34:35 · answer #10 · answered by strange-artist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋