i just got custody of my 7yr old son and i had not seen him for 2 yrs his dad dont want anything to do with him now or me. I just enrolled him is school and he didnt know how to tie his shoes is that normal.I dont know what he should know at this time in his life.
2007-02-12 05:42:35 · 13 answers · asked by tweetysweet032000 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
The school you enroll him in will test him for placement. He should be reading by now (at least sounding out words), and definitely recognize all letters / numbers. He probably should be able to tie his own shoe too, but it's not a big deal if he can't. Good luck!
2007-02-12 05:48:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahah my 9 year old still can't tie her shoes :D Maybe he just never had anything but velcro!
He should be able to read short words and sentences at the very least. If you really are worried, get the school to test him to make sure he hasn't fallen behind.
If you're not sure about his care so far, take him to a doctor, an eye doctor, and a dentist. Make sure he knows basic hygeine. And help him make some new friends - watch how he interacts with the other kids too. Some kids who are raised mostly surrounded by adults won't know how to play properly!
Have fun with the teaching! :)
2007-02-12 16:25:58 · answer #2 · answered by PinkPrincessNerd 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he should know how to tie his shoes by now. You should talk to his teacher and counselor at his school and find out where he needs to be and what you can do to help get him there. It sounds like it's going to take work, if you are willing and able.
But, I'm curious how you could not see your own son for two years. Where have you been in all this? Why haven't you been involved? You're his mother.
2007-02-12 05:46:37 · answer #3 · answered by Groovy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is to keep him in school. He should have had a start to education already but that can't be helped now. Show him what you know and encourage him to learn. Don't forget to praise his accomplishments. Kids usually learn to tie their shoes between 5 and 7 so he isn't abnormal.
2007-02-12 05:52:36 · answer #4 · answered by SpecterFrey 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, where were you the last two years??? Second, I hope you're gonna take an active role in his education, helping him at home, making sure he gets his work done (BEFORE he watches TV OR plays games).... yeah, I'm a teacher, so I hate it when parents don't participate in their kids education. Make sure you help him spell things correctly, without doing the homework for him.
Anyway, your son should know everything basic about taking care of himself by now.... tying his shoes, going to the bathroom (with lifting the lid and aiming properly please). If he doesn't know already, you should be teaching him how to do stuff like make his bed, clean his room, eat neatly, butter his own toast, simple things like that.
I had a sister-in-law that couldn't even teach my 9-year-old twins and 11-year-old nephews how to pee in the toilet properly without making a mess ALL OVER THE PLACE. Your son should also know how to brush his teeth.... you teach him properly now, and you'll save big bucks on dental expenses later (filling cavities and all that fun stuff)..... at least twice a day, morning and night. You might want to pick out his clothes for him, but he should be able to get dressed on his own. Watch him in the tub, but for the most part, he should be able to wash himself as well. And please.... when he reaches about age 10 or 11, make sure he takes a bath/shower EVERY DAY..... I've had to deal with some students who come in stinking to high heaven because their parents don't care about their cleanliness. It's really gross, and the other kids tend to make fun of them.... hard to make friends that way and then they start to act out at school, more then they ever would before.
Anyway, I pray the best for you and your son.... sorry it's gonna be so difficult raising him alone. It'll be hard work, but very worth it in the end. Your son will love you for it.... and don't forget to make sure he knows you love him.... lots of hugs for him. :)
2007-02-12 06:00:32 · answer #5 · answered by Lindz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is only gonna know what he has been taught. If he acts as if he has no clue what your talkin about try teaching him that is now your place. Dad obviously had no time for the child. Be patient he will come around just don't push to hard and scare him you have to realize everything is new to him right now and i'm sure he is scared enough. Just be a good loving mother nd everything will work out. GOOD LUCK!
2007-02-12 05:53:57 · answer #6 · answered by Tonya B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well different kids learn at different paces but im sure if you are willing to teach him what he dont know he will catch on quickly.....my 3 year old knows how to tie her shoes but she learned really early in my opinion.....he should be at least writing his name....knows the numbers and knows how to read simple words....talk to your son and find out what he knows and what he wants to learn...you need to get back into your sons life and learn a litttle about him again...cuz if not you will never connect with him like mother and son should.,...good luck girl
2007-02-12 05:48:30 · answer #7 · answered by LUCKYGIRL 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh I teach 7 year olds. He should know basically how to read and they are suppose to learn to tie their shoes in Kindergarten here in VA.
He should also be learning his basic subtraction & addition facts.
2007-02-12 05:46:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My little brother is 11, and he still doesn't know how to tie his shoes very well. Kids learn stuff like tying their shoes whenever someone sits down and teaches them, so probably it's just that no one's sat down and made sure he knew how to tie his shoes. No worries there!
That's true of a lot of things at that age--making their bed, getting dressed in the morning, etc. If no one teaches you, how can you know? :) So if things like that come up, don't freak out. Remember, kids learn at different paces. That's great that you got him into school--he'll learn a lot there. Not just academic stuff, but social things too. Be sure to get to know his teacher, and tell her/him of any concerns you might have about his development. She'll be able to tell you how he compares to the other kids his age.
Here's some specific things not to be too worried about right now:
Bad handwriting--it takes some kids longer to learn to write than others, and some people just never have good handwriting. I studied handwriting until 6th grade, and mine still isn't that great. But I'm going pre-med, and it hasn't slowed me down!
If he seems clingy/needy/anxious--since he hasn't seen you for 2 yrs, and he's just starting at a new school, it will be natural for him to be somewhat anxious as he gets settled in. Don't scold him for crying or seeming sad--that's normal. It will help him if you establish a basic routine: bedtime at the same time every evening, regular mealtimes, etc. Ask him if there's kids in his class that he likes and invite them over--that will help him make new friends and feel like he's part of his class at school. 7 year-olds don't need long lectures about stuff, but encourage him to talk to you about how he's feeling--just ask him, "What are you feeling right now?" (angry, sad, happy, scared). That way, he'll know you won't get mad if he's sad or scared. Kids don't know that if you don't tell them! And, I know this is hard, but don't talk bad about his dad in front of him. Even though it sounds like his dad is a jerk, your son could start to worry that he's a jerk just because his dad is, and that you won't like him because you don't like his dad. Even though that's not true, kids have a hard time understanding that you'll love them no matter what.
So, most important, just tell him that you love him and support him no matter how he's doing in school or at tying his shoes. :) Celebrate when he learns something new or gets a good grade (give him a high-five or make him something special for dinner, tell other family members about it so they can congratulate him). Little things like that will build his confidence.
If you have other things that you worry about (if he's developing on time), you can talk to his teacher or pediatrician. They'll know what's normal for his age. Kids that age are still pretty little! Their motor skills are still developing--that's why all that running around outside, playing catch, and jumping up and down is so important. Their bodies are still learning. Plus, things like tying your shoe require a lot of small motor skills--the same thing you use to write, type, and draw. Kids that age are just learning how to do that stuff!
Congrats on getting your son, and I hope everything goes well for you two. I'm sorry about his dad--sounds like he's a real jerk--but the kid sounds great, and I hope he'll bring some extra sunshine to your life. Kids can be hard work (I have 4 younger siblings), but they're little bundles of joy, too. :) Blessings!
2007-02-12 06:07:51 · answer #9 · answered by kacey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he should know how to tie his shoe. be potty traind read a lil count a lil stuf like that abc 123
2007-02-12 05:46:03 · answer #10 · answered by shy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋