I fell madly in love with this iranian woman about 4 years ago. We became friends after going out for a while, but i did not want to end it! We tried unsuccessfully to be friends the last couple years..and now i am finding that i miss her. I mean..she was nice to me, but she used me. I cannot get that part out of my mind. And since i obviously still in a way have feelings for her..should i or should i not call her or not call her? I stopped calling her for a while to get out of my mind..and i did..for a short time. But maybe it's true love? I do not know. Take in account that i am not iranian..and not muslim. I'm an arabic christian man. I would appreciate some thought out answers to this. Put yourselves in our shoes. Thank you!
2007-02-12 05:23:20 · 9 answers · asked by trapper 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well first of all, if she used you, then why do you want her so badly? It's not true love if she used you. True love is a two-way street. It has to be mutual. If she used you, then it's not.
Secondly, if you really want to get it off your chest, then it's probably best to just call her & get it over with. If you don't call her, then it's probably just going to bother you for the rest of your life because you'll be thinking about all of the "could've, would've, should'ves" & "what ifs." You never want to get stuck with a big old headfull of "what ifs." They're bad news.
So just call her & see what happens. Don't go jumping the gun making assumptions that you'll get back together. Just call her first & see how she responds or if she even picks up. One step at a time.
And also, if this is going to affect your religious beliefs, then maybe you oughta think twice. But if it doesn't bother either one of you that it's against your ethnicity or religion to date one another, then give her a ring. The worst thing that could happen is either that her phone number has changed or else she is simply not interested in being with you. And then you can move on.
2007-02-12 05:36:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to ask yourself why you were unsuccessful at being friends. You say she was nice to you but she used you, was it something you were able to get over? If not, then maybe that is why you are still thinking of her. Maybe you could also still be thinking of her because you never told her how you feel really? If you did not ever tell her then I think you should tell her how you feel about her. Where there relationship problems because she is Iranian and you christian? In that department I do not know what to tell you, it was just a thought because you mention it and I know it had to make differences in your lives, if you were both dedicated religiously. That could be the reason your friendship never worked out. If that is the problem you think, ask some others what they have done in similar situations and try to work with it. Maybe one of you could change your religion to get along better, maybe not, I don't know either of you.
It is possible that it is/was true love and I think you should call her.
2007-02-12 05:43:20 · answer #2 · answered by Wendy C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a girl from Europe visit me in the states. We had a great time but after she went back, she didn't want to talk because it was to difficult to love someone you couldn't be with. I let it go for 4 years and finally wrote her an email. She was so excited that she moved in with me and we're getting married and having a baby. That's awesome that you are an arabic christian. God bless you. Seek him and let him work it out.
2007-02-12 05:29:25 · answer #3 · answered by wassupmang 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't like to be in your shoes!
Time heals all wounds. Maybe the time is not right for you to have a relationship with her yet.
Don't call her until you have forgiven her.
Don't expect too much to come of it
2007-02-12 05:30:59 · answer #4 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should just move on. There are lots of fish in the sea and I'm sure that there is one out there that is your soul mate.
2007-02-12 05:32:42 · answer #5 · answered by harmon_sharlene 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man yer just out lookin for a heart ache arent ya,
if it didnt work out the first time whats makes you think it will work out this time
and you knowing why it didnt work out makes it worst
let her go, man ... you need to move on.
2007-02-12 05:33:06 · answer #6 · answered by outlaw64 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you answer your own question in all that story?
Your friendship should always be offered openly and honestly.
2007-02-12 05:29:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
call her
2007-02-12 05:27:34 · answer #8 · answered by NMarieH 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave it alone, it isnt worth it.
2007-02-12 05:26:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋