Do ytou think parents should be strict and harsh?

Question

I'm 15 and talking to parents and adults, it's my perception that most of them think parents should be kind strict and harsh. That is, they should control their kid's lives, punish them whenever they do something wrong, with harsh punishments,never forgive, make their kids fee bad and humilitaed when they mess up. I also got the perception that most parents think they shouldn't take into account their kids willingness to change, and have as aa principle thetif a kid messed up, did something wrong, broke their parents trust, then he's damned, heor she will never earn it back and will neve be forgiven. Well,if in adulthood it's like that, the everybody is damned, because almost ult dose such things once in a while. If my perception is right, this is scary. I've had many conflicts w/ my parents, but never really messed up. So, if I do something wrong, which is possible, I'm not perfect, then I'll lose their love, trust, everything for life, even if I do my best to make up for my mistake?

Answer 1

hey why not give a good spanking

Answer 2

Parents did start having kids and were made responsible for them. being a parent is a very important and hard job to do. Being a child is easy up to hitting puberty for most kids, some kids are just unlucky to have parents that neglect and abuse them.
Your parents have felt very protective of you when you were little, it very hard to learn to let go and let have your teen it's own responsibilities. You are 15 now. Can you handle the responsibility to go out and be back before the set curfew. Parents being harsh isn't good, strict is important, they want you to succeed in live, once you ready to move out. Even when you did something wrong, talk about it, because if it makes you feel insecure, it is important you talk about your feeling and maybe your parents need to learn how to express themselves to you as well. When you were born,you didn't come with a "how-to-use" manual. As parents you need to figure out everything and parents are insecure too, they don't want you to fail, because they blame it on themselves thinking they did something wrong.
You know what, why not make the first move yourself and compliment your parents on what they've done right in your sight. When your mom cleaned the house, tell her she did a great job. When you dad fixed something for you, tell him how much you appreciated that. It maybe an eye-opener for them to compliment you more too. And when you feel you need to talk, ask them to sit down with you, they can't read you, there's a lot going on whilst growing closer to being an responsible adult. Don't violate their rules and they'll give you more freedom as well. Never try to yell, slam doors, but tell them you need time to reflect and find a solution that works.
Good luck.

Answer 3

As a parent there is a great thing called unconditional love. No matter what my children do I will always love them!!! If they mess up, they have consequences, but that's part of teaching them to be adults. If we went through life thinking we could do whatever we wanted without consequences that would never work. Parents correct their children out of love. If they didn't love them they would allow them to behave however they wanted. If the trust is broken, it takes alot of work to mend it, but the love is always there. Being able to forgive is a big one! We are human and we aren't perfect. Give your parents more credit. If you were to mess up big, I think you would find that they will still love you and be able to forgive you and teach you how to be a wonderful adult!!!

Answer 4

I'm a parent of three girls 10,6 & 3...and while I feel it is my job to parent my kids and not be their friend......... I will always love them no matter what they do......however I may not always like and agree with what they do....I do not consider them bad kids if they do something bad.......they are not their actions.....In that case they are my kids that I love who need discipline......I am strict and I punish my kids when they mess up.....but not because I want them to feel humiliated and bad.....it is because I want to teach them responsibility, respect for others and self-respect.......If they lie to me they will be punished for that lie........and they will have to earn back the trust they lost in lying.......I am not perfect......my kids are not perfect......I don't expect perfectionism from them......and I am hoping that I am teaching and showing them not to expect perfectionism from me as a parent or in others......I just want them to be the best people they can be........I believe as a parent it is my job to help my child begin that journey......and it doesn't come with me turning the other way to every wrong doing just because I'm afraid my children will grow up not liking me......this is just my opinion.....but i hope it helps

Answer 5

I think today's parents should be more stricter. If you break your parents trust you have to earn it back and it may take awhile. If there is a harsh punishment then you're more likely not to do the "crime". Just like in our own judical system. 50 yrs ago a child rapist would have been lynched or something, today they get a slap on the wrist (few years in jail) and they are allow out.

Answer 6

How a parent should parent a child DEPENDS on the child. I don't feel most parents are strict or harsh without good reason BUT there are some parents out there that are just off the hook and should be tamed.

Answer 7

we have to be strict in this day and age not because of you children but because how society has drastically changed for the worse and we worry we dont wont somethin happenenig to you guys so if its seems harsh and strict i quess you will have to deal with it cause we are doin it cause we love you

Answer 8

yes

Answer 9

depends on what you did wrong