2007-02-12 00:37:30 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
not stricly a joke but it made me laugh:
sorry it's a bit long
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.
>
> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
>
> 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.
>
> 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.
>
> 5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
>
> 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas stove.
>
> 7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
>
> 8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
>
> 9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.
>
> 10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
>
> 11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
>
> 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
>
> 13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again."
>
> And; last, but not least:
>
> 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."
2007-02-12 00:41:58 · answer #1 · answered by ngbreeca 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
One night a guy was in bed asleep. He was dreaming he was a chicken. Feeling a rumbling in his stomach he was getting excited he was about to lay his first egg. Out came the egg and he was very happy. Then out came another. Suddenly his wife woke him saying honey honey wake up your poohing in bed
2007-02-12 00:41:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
two pinguins sat in a bathtub...one said pleae past the soap...the other one said what do you think i am, a vending machine!
my dad made it up when he was in college...like 20 or 25 years ago...
2007-02-12 00:40:26 · answer #3 · answered by SwimloverA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you know when a dung beetle is drunk?
He falls off his stool.
2007-02-12 00:53:04 · answer #4 · answered by tilly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I meet you daily in day dream
2007-02-12 00:40:24 · answer #5 · answered by anubhav_55 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd love to tell you, but I would probably get a violation notice :)
2007-02-12 00:40:21 · answer #6 · answered by P K 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My last paycheck.
2007-02-12 00:40:29 · answer #7 · answered by credo quia est absurdum 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's red and not there?
No tomatos
2007-02-12 00:40:02 · answer #8 · answered by Yeah yeah yeah 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you know what my favorite place is??
Uranus
2007-02-12 01:04:26 · answer #9 · answered by Kate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋