really bad week?

Question

ive had a really bad week this week. i suffer from depression as a result of my best friend dying 5 years ago when we were 16. ive foudn it really hard to cope with life.but the last few months have been slightly better and i feel like im getting somewhere. last week my uncle attempted suicide which was a big shock to the family and is on life support. that affected me a lot and brought up a lot of other issues. but 3 days ago my best friend also attempted suicide and is still in hospital! im so lost and confused and so hurt by what she has done... but i also just want to be with her all the time so she knows that i love her. the problem is my family and a lot of other people keep telling me that i need to step back from the situation to stop myself being brought down again by her actions..but shes my best friend! how am i supposed to just let it go right now. i cant put myself before her right now..its just not me.do i need to step back a bit from this,to help myself..is that selfish?

Answer 1

No it's not selfish. Write her a letter explaining your feelings, and have someone give it to her, and just stay back and take care of yourself.

You know it's not your fault all this is happening. It's sad that you have all these people around you suffering from depression and having suicidal thoughts.

You know the world is tough, but life is precious. You should never feel it's so bad that you must take your life.

What's wrong with our young people today? When we were young we would hang out and have fun and play tennis and we loved school and we worked after school and had guys following us everywhere.

Today, all our young people are obsessed with the impossible that is not real and created by the media. You know life doesn't have to be that way.

Sometimes I long for a nice quiet life in the country...and yet people want to escape that life and think the city is so much better.

Every walk of life has its own set of difficulties. It's dangerous here, the pollution will kill you, the streets aren't safe to walk, it's so expensive, the stress will knock you out. So hey, look around you at the beauty of the simple things in life. Find ways to express yourself creatively and do things you enjoy doing.

Life is about love and I'm sorry that your friends around you don't have the love for themselves they should have. Its a sin to rob yourself of the gift of life. You should not have those thoughts. You are stronger than that.

Just because others around you are not, do not let them drag you down. Escape through books and you find worlds of wonder there and sooner or later you will find yourself stronger.

I don't think you should put yourself around people who pull you down.

I know it sounds selfish but you have to think of yourself. Tell your friend you love her when she is better but tell her you dont want to spiral down that same road she did. Maybe that will make her fight harder to come back and be well and she will see how wrong she is. You can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved, but you can save yourself. Good luck.

Answer 2

I think taking a step back is a great idea. Your best friend obviously struggles with depression, and it's great that you have someone to talk to about it... but I don't believe that will help you get better. Sometimes you have to put yourself first... there is nothing wrong with being selfish sometimes. I would recommend therapy, positive friends and activities, and a vacation.

Suicide is a very selfish act. Your friend was only thinking about her pain, the pain it would cause everyone else didn't even cross her mind.

It's okay for you to take a step back and focus on yourself in a positive way...

Answer 3

It really depends on how you let her actions affect you! I think you family and friends sound worried about that considering your own admitted depression. You have been through an awful lot especially lately and you may be fragile yourself. I personally understand your desire to be there with your friend but it should only be with he idea that she knows that you love her and not feeling responsible in that you feel the need for constant contact with the situation. A visit daily would seem to me to be okay but not a bed side vigile. I believe that you should see your own doctor and explain what is going on and see what he/she thinks about it. I don't think pulling away from her totally is the answer, though. Go see your doc! That's what he's there for. Good luck and God Bless you for being a good friend.

Answer 4

lifestyles does get complicated. it continually looks like no longer something is going actual. Over labored below paid. Inflation, taxes, relationships, relatives, college, no longer something looks actual. i think like that oftentimes used and so do alot of different persons. My Grandmother might tell me how difficult that they had it interior the previous "HA" , it relatively is a shaggy dog tale. lifestyles is getting extra durable for anybody. I used to get so disillusioned. It receives extra effortless as you become older. The melancholy and tension improve into much less and much less oftentimes used. you start to realize that it is not so undesirable. for each one million door that closes 2 extra will open and issues will continually get extra effective. this would no longer be the suitable advise yet I additionally smoke Marijuana. one million or 2 puffs and a Bob Marley Cd will positioned all persons in a solid temper. Works everytime.

Answer 5

By stepping back and getting medical attention to help you overcome the sad feelings that you have, you'll become stronger and better equipped to help others cope. You can't prevent someone else from drowning if you don't know how to swim or have a life raft to throw.

Answer 6

A man goes to a shop, picks up a beautiful cup and says "my god this cup is so beautiful" and suddenly the cup starts talking to the man. The cup starts saying "O man, I am beautiful right now, but what was the state of my being before the pot-maker made me a beautiful pot?

Before I was sheer mud and the pot-maker pulled me out of the mud from the mother earth and I felt why that pot-maker is so cruel, he has separated me from mother earth. I felt a tremendous pain. And the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then he put me and churned me, when I was churned I felt so giddy, so painful, so stressful, I asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then he put me into a oven and heated me up, I felt completely burnt. There was tremendous pain and I asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" and the pot-maker said, "Just wait."

Then he poured hot paint on me and I felt the fume and the pain, I again asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" and the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then again he put me into an oven and heated it to make me more strong, I felt life is so painful hence pleaded the pot-maker and the pot-maker said, "Just wait." And after that the pot-maker took me to the mirror and said, "Now look at yourself". And surprisingly I found myself so beautiful.

When god gives us lot of trouble, it appears god is very cruel but we need patience and we have to wait. When bad things happen to good people, they become better and not bitter.

So all difficulties are part of a cosmic design to make us really beautiful. We need patience, we need understanding, we need the commitment to go through in a very calm and wise way. So all difficulties are not to tumble us but to humble us.

With this understanding, let us not be against difficulty. Understand difficulty is a part of a purifying process. A purifying process at present which we cannot understand and hence we need faith and we need trust.

Let us understand how to handle stress with this background. You can be affected by stress from two angles. There is an internal stress and there is an external stress. Nobody can avoid stress; one has to only manage stress. Managing stress can be internal and also external.

The internal stress is; your thoughts can create stress, your values can create stress, and your beliefs can create stress, meaning thereby your stress is coming from your mind more from the outer world. Many people suffer not from heart attack - they suffer from thought-attack.

For example, when somebody says you are an idiot, we get so hurt, we get so victimised. My boss has called me an idiot and I am feeling tremendous pain. Now where does this stress come from? If my boss has called me an idiot, I have to ask myself "am I an idiot"?

If I am an idiot nothing to be upset about; and if I am not an idiot, then also nothing to be upset about! It is the perception of the boss. But why do we suffer from that stress? I suffer not because my boss has called me an idiot but because of the thought-attack.

I may say the boss has called me an idiot; therefore I am suffering? It is true that the words are unpleasant. But what hurts is the interpretation of the unpleasant word. The thought in me interprets. That is pain and therefore it becomes pain. Much of our stress is our mind interpreting it as pain. So we suffer from thought-attack more than heart attack.

Answer 7

dont see it as stepping back for you but for her...let her know you care and tell her you will be there for her soon as she gets some help. She doesnt need to feel guilty for causing you stress and if she is a good friend she will see the tension all over your face and will know she put it there.

Answer 8

everyone has bad times, and as for your friends, it's them, not you... so realize that much is still good, your alive, and well, celebrate that and pray for the peace over your friends and life... just celebrate your own achievements