Boyfriend speaks to ex every week regarding children, Is it ok to ask subtly what they were talking about?

Question

Slight insecurity although she is with someone and he always tells me he loves me.They seperated 3 years ago.

Answer 1

You could ask but, not in a way that sounds like your interrogating him...I talk to my husbands ex, she tells me everything, plus i think she rather talk to me and not him....

Answer 2

To be honest, if they broke up 3 years ago despite there being a child, I think that although your insecurities are understandable, they are probably just that - insecurities.

My partner has a child from a previous relationship and although it was hard at first - especially with her being quite a one for trying to cause us problems - I trust that he's chosen to be with me and therefore has no interest in her. If he did, they wouldn't have split and he wouldn't have met and formed a relationship with me.

If he seems particularly secretive about this - leaving the room to have conversations, spending a long while on the phone etc then maybe confront him gently and subtly. Perhaps you could say something like, "honey, I appreciate you looking out for my feelings but I really don't mind you talking to your ex in front of me. In fact, I think it would be a good thing if you felt you could be open about it so please don't feel like you might be offending me by speaking in front of me."

If he still insists on being secretive then perhaps a more frank conversation needs to take place.

Answer 3

2 a million/2 3 hundred and sixty 5 days olds have VERY short thoughts and interest spans. She'll forget him any day now. do basically no longer communicate him and don't enter into conversations approximately him while she brings him up. a new child would not choose an evidence for a breakup. next 3 hundred and sixty 5 days, she would be able to no longer even undergo in strategies that he existed.

Answer 4

Keep your own council and get over your slight insecurity. You should be happy that your man is honorable and man enough to take his responsibilities as a parent seriously and is involved in their upbringing. It is critical that parents share good communication. It is better for the children that both parents are on the "same page" and have a united front. Be supportive!

Answer 5

Don't be insecure. You'll turn him off or get him angry. I used to be insecure about my hubby's ex and it created a lot of fights between us. He never had an interest in her except that she was the mother of his 3 kids. I FINALLY got over it and she and I are actually friends. Been married 16 years and counting. Don't ask about the phone conversation. Ask how his kids are. If there is something he wants to share, he'll share it.

Answer 6

your boyfriend speaks to his ex , they have children together .....
they have been separated 3 years ago , that is long enough for you to think nothing will restart between them , but mostly ? he is with you and not her .............it is his EX ,
since they are children in the middle, please do not meddle , it will not be look upon with a good eye by neither one of them , they should communicate especially since kids are involved .
please respect their conversations and do not ask about them ;
with kids , they will always talk ........it is normal :-)
i can understand you not feeling comfortable about it , in a way .but if it was the other way around , you with children and an ex .........how would you feel ?
what happened with them , does not regard you at any way , it is part of his pass ,but there is an important remaining fact : KIDS,
be cool about it and let not this little detail (telephone)not put any weight on your relationship with him ..........
trust him ......and respect him .......

Answer 7

If you ask too often - then it will become annoying and make you sound paranoid. If you have a generally good relationship there should be no reason why you cannot discuss anything freely, just don't go on about it all the time. If kids are involved, he is sure to have to discuss them with his ex.

Answer 8

You have nothing to worry about.Your boyfriend sounds like a good father and obviously has to be on speaking terms with the mother for the sake of his children.But it sounds like theyve both moved on in their lives, so try to be understanding of his position and dont let it make you feel insecure, after all its you he now chooses to be with.Id resist asking what they tak about unless he brings it up.good luck.

Answer 9

ask him if he minds you asking about the conversation he is having. that way you will know how he feels. he might have no idea that it bothers you so much? my bloke speaks to his ex re the kids and they have a real good relationship but i just deal with it at the end of the day he is with me and thats all that matters (i think, lol) hope that helps u xxx

Answer 10

you should ask blatently what they are on about - why not??!

My fella has an ex and a child - we discuss everything

but on another note - you really have nothing to be worried about - they are ex's for a reason, they have been apart for 3 years - they are unlikely to get back together again - you think about it - if you split up with someone and there are no children involved, its for a good reason, if you split up with someone and there are children involved - it must be a VERY VERY good reason since you wouldn't leave someone for nothing when you had responsibilies would you!!

hope I helped!

xxx

Answer 11

Don't worry about this - it's quite normal (and nice) for him to be concerned about his kids. You wouldn't want it any other way, would you - or he'd be a monster! I would think it'd be quite ok to ask 'So how are the kids?' after a phone call - after all, you should be interested in them, since they are the loved ones of your loved one!