Why do people judge others on appearance?

Question

I'm 25 yrs old and married. I worked since leaving school and only just quit to spend time with my children (having missed the 1st few years of my oldest son's life due to working).

When I get on busses etc people titter and give me filthy looks. It's not paranoia. My mother was on the bus with me one day and an old lady was giving me really dirty looks. Out of interest I dropped into the conversation my age and wedding anniversary. The old lady immediately stopped glaring at me and smiled!

I get this reaction all the time, just because I only look about 19.

Sorry, it's more of a rant that a question.

Answer 1

People judge so they can label a person or object. When I was younger, we competed in street drag racing. Fancy cars with loud pipes and racing stickers got everyone's attention. One guy had a beat-up car, but he wanted to race anybody. He did and he won most of the time. It was a trick on his part to deceive others. Sorta like undercover agents.

I had long hair when I was a kid. We got a new boss and a few weeks later, he asked at quitting time when I was scheduled to work again. I told him it was in two days. He replied I had enough time to get a haircut before then. I didn't go back.

Judging is natural. And, it can be healthy. My wife stopped a grocery store one night. At the entrance, were five young males just hanging out. It did not look and feel right. She enter the store, did her shopping, and forgot about those guys. On the way out, they pushed her and grabbed her purse.

You should always judge people and situations and objects. But, it should be done with an open mind.

I'm curious about your situation. It's hard to believe people "give you dirty looks" just because you look younger than you are. Are you displaying tatoo's, piercings, long hair, or doing other things that the older generation might not approve of? If you have some of these qualities, then they are judging you on those things, and not your youth.

Some people glare all the time. It's there natual look for whatever reason. Maybe, you are reading something into their dirty looks. Wish you luck with the family and job, and balancing the two.

Answer 2

We judge on appearance, as 90% of all language is visual, body language, and it is easier to 'listen' (look), than to engage in verbal conversation, and discover actually who somebody is. Also the old ladies were expected to look like their mothers as soon as they were married, not like single girls, so they are judging you the same way that they were judged themselves.

They in turn pass on thier predijuces and misconceptions to thier own children, and until the chain is broken, it will continue. War is a very good cleanser of old stuck in the mud traditions. However, the euphoria is short lived as the depression of having to pay for the clean up pulls a population back down again. The world has not had a 'major' war for 60 years, thus there is nothing new to talk about - and the attention wanders onto you, where they can apply all those misconceptions whilst they wait for something to actually happen in thier life.

Answer 3

Maybe because the media paints such a bad portrait of certain people that people simply take it for granted that those people are bad... After all, a magazine can't really show what people are thinking all the time.

I mean, when I went down the street with my hoodie up the other day to stop my hair getting wet, people either glared at me or gave me a wide berth. I'm not someone who picks fights randomly, and I'm not a chav- I'm a goth, but people don't see that.

Answer 4

I don't know why that is, and I agree that being judged on appearance alone is quite unsettling. I read on another answer once that when we first meet someone, we unconsciously and immediately make at least 2 judgements about them. Perhaps it goes back to our roots, our instinctual nature to find the perfect mate, or for safety, as in "can we trust this person?"

Whatever the reason, as long as you are a good person by your own definition, then you are just fine as you are. Be yourself. Those who would judge you harshly without taking the time to know you, well, you can live without them. What they think and say shouldn't matter much in the long run.

Answer 5

Much older people come from a time where women were repressed and it was considered shameful to have a child if you were unmarried or a teenager. Some people just refuse to accept that this is 2007, not the 1950s.

Answer 6

What do you look like that would make people do that? From my personal experience, I notice that small town people tend to do that. City people see all kinds of strange looking people and don't even bother to turn their heads. I grew up in the sixties and worked in a mental hospital, nothing surprises me very much.

However, I am a white male, sometimes I wear a skull cap like Muslims might wear. If I wear it in public I fell like people are staring at me and I sense a "negative vibe." I think it's kind of amusing, actually--who cares what I'm wearing as long as I'm not walking around naked or something?

Sometimes I catch myself staring when pretty young girls walk around with their rear ends sticking out of their pants and so on.
I guess they want to be stared at by males (especially young men), but I try to keep it to a minimum so I don't look like a dirty old man.

Yes, there are a lot of rude people in this world.

Answer 7

People are naturally judgemental and until you have started to speak they have nothing to judge you on apart from your appearance. Once you have had a conversation they have more to judge you on and can adjust their inital impression.

We also judge beautiful celebs negatively for all sorts of reasons - being too thin, too fat, having a face lift etc. We don't know them personally & probably wouldn't be so mean if we did.

I wish I looked younger than I do - make the most of it.

Answer 8

Hummm. choose? No. be sure? confident. occasion: as quickly as I see a dude wearing dishevelled denims with affordably embroidered dragons up the pant legs, a dishevelled blouse, silver chain necklace, and a sideways ball cap, i will come to the knowledgeable end that he's the stereotype familiar as "punk" of the decrease center classification who probable shops at JC Penney via fact his McDonald's sallary won't locate the money for any greater efficient. rigidity lines in his face or darkish circles under his eyes often potential considered one of two issues - he's on drugs, or he's have been given toddlers with some bum female chum who's unemployed. The powers of remark, my chum. yet do I choose him in accordance with what style of man or woman I be sure him to be? No. via fact for all i comprehend he's the nicest guy interior the worldwide.

Answer 9

when i was reading ur question i thought i'd find something wrong about the way you look and i felt sorry for u .......and after knowing that its because u look 19... i'm shocked .....its the best feeling in the world when ur 30 you will be thankful for it :) cheer up...and take their dirty looks at u as a compliment :)

Answer 10

Do you really care what a bunch of old fogies on a bus think? They talk about everyone and everything because they've got nothing better to do with their lives and are just hanging around waiting to die. Don't let them bother you.