Do you think spanking your kid is wrong??

Question

because i dont.
Parents have been doing that kind of thing for hundreds of years..
people's objections and reasoning for not spanking kids is RIDICULOUS. i kno that my parents and millions of others have been "threatened" with switches as a child..
i was even spanked when i was little...and im probably one of the best behaved kids i know.


parents are getting soft and they are wanting to be their childrens friends. thats ruining kids. they arent doing what they have to do to teach their children right from wrong. now there are limits. but a swat on the butt when your child misbehaves isnt that bad!!!
besides, i remeber as a kid i would get spanked and in a minute or two i was fine, but i still knew that if i did that again, i would get spanked again.

and now, the government has started to control the way we discipline kids. which i think is completely wrong. the government is getting too personal. unless its abusive, they should have no decision on how we raise our children.

Answer 1

I was spanked as a kid, and it didn't scar me. I do occasionally spank my 3yo, but I'm careful. Usually it amounts to no more than a light swat on the bottom. I actually found that time outs work better with him, and I swore I'd never do that! LOL On the rare occasions when he is extremely defiant, I have a lightweight plastic sponge bob paddle (part of a paddleball game). I use it on his bare bottom so I can make sure I'm not hurting him. It stings, but leaves no marks so I know I'm not doing permanent damage.

I was really concerned when I heard that California was trying to pass a bill to outlaw spanking. The idea of the gov't telling me how to discipline my child is disconcerting, to say the least. I have a mostly well-behaved little boy, but I'd hate to think how he'd do if I was given a set of "rules" for my discipline of him.

All that being said, if someone seriously objects to spanking, I'm not going to diss them for that. It's their choice. I'd rather see someone not spank than to abuse a child.

Answer 2

I think spanking is ok to an extent. My children only get a spanking when it is the last resort. If a time out isnt working or taking away whatever they have doesnt work than they will get a spanking. The other reason for a spanking would be running in the street something to show them right away like hey I am not joking around. I think only spanking a child when it is the last resort and necessary is ok. But if you spank them for everything I dont think it becomes effective anymore. My daughters only gets a spanking once every so often. So when they get a spanking they know mom is not going to mess around. If they hit eachother they stand in timeout. The majority of the time they stand in timeout because it is effective for them but I know it is not effective for everyone. I do not believe you should ever hit your child with an object. If you only do it when necessary they are going to react to the swat on the butt. If you do it often they are going to not care about the swat and then parents turn to the belt or a wooden paddle just so it hurts more. I could never bring myself to hurt my children like that. It would break my heart. I would just see how bad I hurt them and I would be able to see it in their face and there is no way I would ever bring myself to do that. You just have to be consitant and talk to your child so they know what is going on throughout the day and there are no suprises. Give them attention and love and they will give that back. I found just talking to them and giving them choices throughout the day helps make a day go a lot smoother.

Answer 3

I would say it depends on the child and the situation. To say that spanking is always OK or is always wrong is naive. Some children will respond to just the sound of a stern voice, some will not pay attention unless they are physically forced to. To use more force than necessary is where abuse starts. Children will not generally suffer any mental anguish from being spanked as long as they know it is done to educate and train them rather than because one of their parents is malicious and out of control. As far as governments involvement in the matter I personally feel it is an infringement of our rights as Americans to limit the methods through which we can discipline and teach our children. Though, it is difficult to completely stop abuse and still allow physical punishment. To this I would say, "You can not infringe upon the rights of some to preserve the rights of others and believe this to be justice."

Answer 4

I think there are two main things to consider with spanking- first, the constitution of the child- or how they think. Some children will respond very positively to spanking, and that sort of physical punishment is effective, but some children have a natural resistance to physical intimidation, and will not be phased by the spanking, and could end up being spanked a lot without any benefit. Make sure you're child benefits from it or they will end up hating you for it later.

The next thing to remember in spanking is the lesson you want to teach. Sometimes a child is wild and wound up, and it drives you crazy. It's best to force them to calm down by making them sit or stand in a corner or something like that. If the child breaks a known rule- that is a good time to spank them. One is a redirection, and the other is a consequence. If you spank the child for both, the child will eventually associate you getting angry with the spanking- which is the same lesson they'd learn if they were abused.

Personally I believe in spanking because I think it can be very effective, but only when used in the right manner. There are definitely ways to mess it up, especially if you use it as a release for your own frustration.

Answer 5

Men have been beating their wives for hundreds of years, too. So?

People aren't getting soft on their kids. 87% of americans hit. So, if you think kids are awful today, that's part of the reason why.

Spanking is wrong. It is always wrong to hit another person. You are not fine having been spanked, because you now think it's right to whack kids. See how damaged you are?

Also, if spanking worked, it wouldn't have needed to be repeated, right. It doesn't work. It's all about parental abuse of power, parents being too limited in their imaginations, time, temper to properly raise a child, all about parents getting out their frustrations on the flesh of their children.

assault is a crime. it's about time the govt noticed that kids are assaulted by their families all the time.

i am glad my parents had the guts to admit they were wrong to hit us. and the 6 never been hit grandchildren are the smartest, politest, kindest, most obedient, thoughtful,and compassionate kids you'll ever meet.

One day, kids will get the respect they deserve and our world will actually be a better place, because it won't be full of people so anxious to grow up so they can start throwing that power trip around.

Answer 6

I don't think it's wrong however I was spanked for EVERYTHING as a child to the point I'd built up a tolerence to the belt and often I was terrified to do anything (such as change clothes without asking my mother or get a drink of water) without the fear of getting spanked...it got to the point where my mother would just spank me out of anger which I think is wrong...but if a child is doing something dangerous or being disrespectful then yes they deserve a spanking...

Answer 7

a friend of mine and i were just discussing this together. she has strong christian beliefs and feels that spanking is necessary. she believes that spanking a child is one of the best ways of disciplining them- as long as the child knows why the parent is spanking them and that the child is told that he/she is loved. i, on the other hand, feel that spanking is not the only way or the best way to discipline a child. i think "consequences" other than physical punishment can be just as effective, and can teach kids that what they have done is wrong and that they better not do it again. if that means they don't get to watch television, or have to take the trash out every day for a week, or they have to wash all of the dishes after dinner with no help, or taking away their favorite toy/movie/book/video game/telephone/etc, or canceling "play dates" with friends then that's what needs to be done. in a world where violence has become the answer to too many people's problems i think we need to teach children that hitting ISN'T the answer.
ps. when i was little my mom did hit me. i believe i am disciplined, but not because of being hit.
another problem i have with parents hitting their children is that they do it out of anger. my christian friend feels that hitting is acceptable if it is not out of anger/frustration. if a parent is hitting a child to teach discipline that is one thing. but hitting out of anger or frustration, in my opinion, is an act of rage/abuse and is not acceptable on any level.

Answer 8

FIRST of all people it is NOT LEGALLY WRONG TO SPANK YOUR KID. It is illegal if you hit a kid with a CLOSED FIST. Now if your kid is over the age of 18 then you can get in trouble for that. And NO IT IS NOT WRONG TO SPANK YOUR KIDS! My parents maybe spanked me once, and that is all it took for me. That way they know you mean business and wont know they can get away from anything. Now if your smacking the sh*t out of your kid making them bleed and scream bloody murder then thats different. A firm but not too hard smack is OKAY! And people wonder why they're kids "act out" when they get older and dont do what they are told.

Answer 9

I DID get the crap beat out of me and I'M NOT OK.

I was never allowed to explain myself, what I was thinking, or even ask why I was being punished. My father was brought up in the old school. At any moment, SMACK, across the face.

'But dad, what did I do?' 'DON'T YOU DARE TALK BACK TO ME.' SMACK.

If I cried??? 'DON'T YOU DARE CRY!!!! I'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT!!!' SMACK, SMACK.

If it wasn't the slap to the face, it was the belt. He swung and missed one time and hit me square in the spine. I was PARALYZED for 3 weeks from the waste down.

Did he ever say he was sorry? **** no, never. He never said he was sorry for anything. That would be admitting he was wrong, AND HE NEVER WAS WRONG.

Small, trivial crap set him off. For example, I sometimes make a slight noise when I separate my lips. He always thought I was deliberately mocking him, even when I explained I didn't even know I was doing it. 'DON"T YOU LIE TO ME'. SMACK

What did my mother say about all this?? 'You know he has arthritis. It hurts his hand when hit hits you.'

It finally stopped when I was 16 and turned the table on him. By then I was 6'2", 220 and stronger than him. We were wrestling and all the abuse hit me at once. I put him in a helatious bear hug and nearly cracked his ribs. He tried to push my arms down, and he hit me with karate chops to my neck, but I wouldn't let go until I WAS DONE, NOT HIM.

SO, MIGHT IS RIGHT!!! NOW I'M THE BIGGER AND STONGER ONE SO HE HAS TO FEAR ME!!!!!

ISN"T THAT WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT???

I vowed I would NEVER spank, or verbally accost my children. I kept my vow. I refused to subject my children to the abuse I received.

I can give a damn what anyone else thinks. Physical and verbal abuse of a child, for ANY reason, is flat out WRONG!!!

How would you like it if some 7'6" 450 lb giant spanked YOU because YOU did something HE DIDN'T like. And that isn't even CLOSE to the proportional difference in sizes.

My all-time favorite quote is from a movie:

"A man who raises his hand in the heat of an argument, is a man who has run out of ideas."

There are so many non-violent avenues of discipline available, to do otherwise is a sin.

I'm not religious, but I ask myself, "Would Jesus spank a child?' I firmly believe he would not, and I'm certainly not better than Jesus.
============================================

"As long as the child will be trained not by love, but by fear, so long will humanity live not by justice, but by force. As long as the child will be ruled by the educator’s threat and by the father’s rod, so long will mankind be dominated by the policeman’s club, by fear of jail, and by panic of invasion by armies and navies.”
BORIS SIDIS, from "A lecture on the abuse of the fear instinct in early education" in Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 1919


"There never was a time when a major social problem was solved by beating a child. And there never will be such a time... For centuries adults have injured children and have lied about it, and other adults have heard those lies and then merely turned away... we must begin putting the blame where it belongs."
C. EVERETT KOOP, M.D., Sc. D., Surgeon General of the U.S. Public Health Service, U. S. Department of Health and Human Services; from the Keynote Address to the Kids Symposium, "Uniting America to Fight Childhood Injury," Washington, D.C., February 16, 1989

Answer 10

I don't think spanking is wrong as long as it's not done excessively or to the point of abuse. I spank my son, but only when everything else doesn't work--when I've told him 18 times in a half hour not to use the oven door as a footstool and he does it a 19th time, I'm gonna spank. Obviously, words alone aren't getting through. I spank as discipline; I don't spank in anger.

I was spanked when I was a kid, and I've also been spanked to excess (but not by my parents--it was by an aunt). I know the difference.

As for the bill introduced in California, I highly doubt that it'll get passed. It would be costly to implement and even more costly to enforce; money that can be better spent on education (which is desperately needed in that state) and abuse prevention programs.