i tend to like guys that i just can't have (are taken) but now i like this boy who is single. (to my knowledge) and its just another hopless situation. i relly don't know him all tht well and i know i ahve to talk to him... but whta about? how could i possible have a conversation with him. he really quiet, and like is super smart and has alot of money. but i just fell 2ft tall when i'm around him and eery thing i say sounds stupid. and i wish it could just be perfect and we could just sit down and have a conversation.
i also don't know if hes shy or just thinks i'm revolting. becasue he knows i like him, but i think he thinks i'm just another hoodrat black girl. but i don't know how to show him the real me. i need help! this is a hopeless situation but i really want to go out with him. what do i do?
2007-02-11 11:28:56 · 10 answers · asked by corie j 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First of all, just be yourself. Ive been in your shoes- along w/ every other female in history....uhg if only i knew then what i know now. I know you want a boyfriend, but seriously whether its this guy or another-- firt off, fall in love w/ YOURSELF. Do whatever it takes to feel good about yourself and that will radiate- They will come to YOU. And if your NOT a hoodrat, they wont think you are, And if you ARE,be proud & you'll find that guy who is looking for a little hoodrat to call his own!!!! : ) Keep your head up.
2007-02-11 11:39:19 · answer #1 · answered by oxleahxo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't fix a hopeless situation because by definition it is beyond hope and the ability to alter circumstances based on your actions is a critical component of hope. Just sayin'.
All logical analysis aside, I would chill the heck out. You are freakin' out over this way too much. Be yourself and make a move if you have to. If you have to communicate in an overt manner, why should that be an obstacle? Why is there a rule against simply coming out and telling a guy, "I'm interested in you and I would like to get to know you better. I'm going to be stopping by Starbucks after work tomorrow...so if you want to hang out, I would love to have you join me." Or something like that.
That would give him the option of showing up or not while keeping it casual and low stress. That way you can save face if he doesn't show and he doesn't have to make excuses or overtly hurt your feelings if he isn't interested. Or if he is interested...he can be smooth about it. Why can't people just tell other people how they feel? Seriously...you only live ONE lifetime and you aren't here on this planet for that long. Don't waste your time on "should I tell him how I feel?" or "How will he know if I like him?" or "does he like me?" There is a simple and a direct route to all of the answers to your questions and if you take responsibilty for your own happiness, the rewards are all potentially yours.
You will feel better once you know if he is interested or not. It is the not knowing part that is so hard to deal with.
2007-02-11 11:32:32 · answer #2 · answered by Evan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm. May be tough especially if he doesn't like pple from other races. As a woman, always know that there are men out there who would love to be with you. but you need to watch men cause they could disappoint you.
If this guy does not like you, let him go. Don't think that you are so cool that you can have anyone. Even though she is so pretty, there are pple who do not dig Hally Berry and there are many who don't dig Paris Hilton and many who don't dig Jolie. It's just the way life is. So, when you find someone good, be happy with them -- but make sure that they are happy with you too.
Also, work on why you like taken guys. That's a bad trait. It will cost you -- and the way some pple take relationships seriously today, you could be shot.
2007-02-11 11:37:39 · answer #3 · answered by JiveSly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first have you explained to him that you are still in love with your ex? If not, then he will see it as complete rejection and you trying to be friends will do this because he likes you still! If you are not winding him up, then I have to say that there cannot be any friendship between you - unless you are willing to give him a chance. You say that you want your EX back. Is there hope that he will come back or is it wishful thinking on your part? If so, then perhaps you should give your friend a chance. You have turned your back on him, but still trying to be friends despite him telling you how he feels, I am not at all surprised that he is aggrieved with you and then says he is not looking anymore. That is because he looked, found, but she does not want to know - ie you. I had a similar situation in my 20's. I was in love, but it was obvious that it was not going to work out and came along - my future husband. Even after our marriage, I embarrassingly, still felt something for my former boyfriend, but not anymore! I bet if you said to give it a go, he would jump at the chance.
2016-05-23 22:55:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He knows you like him so pretty much the hard part is over? Now its just getting him to notice you for you... It's all about small talk... watch and see who he hangs around don't be afraid to just randomly start a conversation. you never know he may be the one carrying the convo and you are just having to tag along. Ask him obvious questions like why he is so smart and why he's so quiet. Possibly maybe you all have a class together and even though you may not need it ask him for help in that class? Just have confidence!
2007-02-11 11:38:28 · answer #5 · answered by oprah08 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find out what you can about him and his interests. If you get the chance, ask a question that you think might get him started talking. Keep asking questions, and if he is at all interested he will ask some back to you. Indicate your interest while maintaining your reserve.
Your statement that he 'has a lot of money' suggests that your interests are a bit superficial. Would you still be interested if he didn't? Money issues and trust issues cause a lot of stress in relationships, so be careful.
2007-02-11 11:38:17 · answer #6 · answered by Eclectic_N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of relax and be yourself. Talk to him and tell him how you feel and if he doesn't want to be with you find you another young man that likes you for you and drop that zero.
Bottom line: If you want to travel far men wise you need to be beyond your targets, Go to school, get a career, travel and do things everyday for you and your peace of mind. They will be leaping out of the woodwork to get with a class act that has gone far in her life powered by her own achievements and sense of self.
2007-02-11 11:36:59 · answer #7 · answered by calmlikeatimebomb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to get an attitude adjustment. Why are you always tripping yourself up by going after guys you can't have? Make friends with people you have something in common with. You might find one of them is a nice guy who will appreciate you.
2007-02-11 11:32:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think you're a genius to get this emotional nightmare organized, get it on to Yahoo! answers!
Welcome to the night mare that is love and dating---it's this way for everyone, with no easy answers.
All you can know about (and really all you have) is yourself to work with, and you sound pretty funny and interesting.
Take a chance, don't be afraid to fail, and be determined---keep the excited, positive, hope alive and be yourself.
2007-02-11 11:37:47 · answer #9 · answered by papyrusbtl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go off and do something else. What you are trying to do right now is beyond you, so forget about it.
2007-02-11 11:32:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋