I answered a question recently asking about being a working mother. I have nothing against working mothers and I know that they are probably trying their best to manage everything. I respect every mother as long as the choices they make are for what they feel is best or needed.
I feel that the ideal situation for a family is to have a mother OR father to stay at home. This may just be my version of an ideal family. Of course the person who is staying at home would have to stay sane and be a good role model but it got me thinking [after I got many thumbs down] that perhaps this isn't what everyone else feels is ideal for a family--not just their own but families in general.
So, I’m asking you [irregardless of your current situation of SAHM or working mother] what do YOU feel is the ideal family lifestyle in general? Thank you for your answer.
2007-02-11 10:10:40 · 10 answers · asked by .vato. 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Sinister--I agree with you. I think that no matter the situation the parents have been put into [single, married, remarried, committed relationship] they can be excellent parents. I think everyone does have the potential regardless of their lifestyle. Anything can work if you make it. I’m just wondering about a specifically ideal situation. We all know the world isn’t ideal or fair but I would like to know if it was an ideal world--what would the ideal situation be. I loved your answer though!
2007-02-11 10:23:08 · update #1
What would be ideal? Like if I could have anything in the world and it would work out?
Both DH and I could work at home making money and we could both be attending college online all the while my 6 littles are happily being homeschooled here with me. Playing with the homeschool group that I run, socialization at its finest right here at my house, at the parks, at the library, at science centers. I am lucky in that I mostly have that. I attend college full time. DH works full time but is not an absent parent by any means, and I get to homeschool my 6 children. I do run the counties homeschool group as well. It works for us. :) I am happy now that I am not working nights 25+ hours because this frees up some me time.
2007-02-11 10:32:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋
An IDEAL family would be:
Both parents loving each other and living in the same home
No one in the family being addicted to anything (including work)
Good communication between ALL family members
Money in the bank, and college-funds set up
Some sort of religion or spirituality in the home
House rules
Chores divided equally and alternated often
Family vacations
Having a family business, in which both parents (and the children, when they're old enough) could work and make a profit would be ideal. A ranch or farm, a doctor or lawyer with a home office, any home-based business, a store...
If the parents needed to work outside the home, they should work near the home, and around each others hours. They should never forget that family ALWAYS comes before any job!
2007-02-11 10:31:52 · answer #2 · answered by Holiday Magic 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Agreed
Ideally, every child would be brought up by a loving mother and father (their natural or adoptive parents) with a stay at home parent. yes that could be a mom or dad.
This is an IDEAL situation. I too, will get thumbs down for this, but children are NOT better off in daycare. I know some have to be there, that's fine, but don't tell me there better off there, that's a flat out lie.
2007-02-11 19:35:57 · answer #3 · answered by olschoolmom 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I don't think there's one right answer for this. EVERYONE is different, and everyone has different views and ideas about what is "ideal" to them. Each family may need something different also.
For instance, for MY family? Our "ideal" lifestyle is with me (the mother) staying home to be able to raise the kids and take care of the home and my husband. And by NOOOO means are we conservative or old-fashioned at ALL. We just really think that for US, this would be ideal. I do currently stay home to care for my 1 year old daughter, but I actually HAVE to anyway right now since she's a micropreemie and isn't supposed to be in daycare till she's at least 2 years old and she also has physical therapists coming every week, so I need to be here for that, etc. She's my number one priority in life and she needs me to be home with her.
However, we live in Orange County, California and cost of living is insane out here! So I know that I will HAVE to go back to work at SOME point, especially if we ever want to adopt any other kids (I can't have any more of my own)--adoption is expensive. So when my daughter starts pre-school, I'll probably go back to working a part-time job.
The way I grew UP, though, is a different view. My mom HATED the idea of staying home with two kids and so WANTED to go to work to get away. My Pops worked full-time, which is usual for most men, and so my maternal Grandma practically raised my sister and I. Maybe that's where I got the idea that being a stay-home-mom was ideal for ME...I was an insanely rebellious teenager since no one was ever home, but thank god I had my grandma to care for me and set me straight. She really believed in being a "universal mother" to all...and I got that trait from her, I'm the same way. I want to take care of everyone. =P
So that's my opinion. I mean, I could go on and have a full conversation/debate about this topic, and I'm also curious to see what others ideas of "ideal" is for THEM...since we're all so different and have different families and goals, etc.
2007-02-11 10:40:37 · answer #4 · answered by Megan V 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, being a new mother and all, I love the idea of me staying home working (hopefully). I don't think I could stand putting my child into a daycare and not being there to see thier firsts and memorable experiences. I want to be there for her while shes young, because these are the learning times for her and time for us to bond. But maybe I like the idea, because I know I will be hard for me to let go either way. Any way I see it, If the mom decides to stay at home (or vice versa), the other one has to be more than willing to go out and find a job to support the family...that is also why I like the idea of any parent who decides to stay home to also find a stay at home job to help with income.
2007-02-11 10:57:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
More than ten hours a week separation from mommy has been found to be profoundly damaging to children under 3. The damage is to attachment between mother and child, to the child's intellect, social skills, emotional well being, behavior, the child's physical health, and even how much the dad approves of the child!
This is not opinion. This is well designed research with thousands of children in many countries over 50 years of research. Everyone can agree children shouldn't be sexually abused. Because it damages the child. Profoundly.
Well, so does premature and too frequent separation from mom damage children profoundly.
Whatever lifestyle keeps a child from not being away from mommy to a damaging degree, supports the mommy in providing mommy's milk for years, and nourishes the child's individuality and emotions while respecting the needs (not wants) of the parents while all family members move forward in life is the ideal family lifestyle.
2007-02-11 10:28:59 · answer #6 · answered by cassandra 6 · 6⤊ 4⤋
The ideal situation is the one that God designed.
A mother and a father, a stay at home mom is ideal.
2007-02-11 12:31:20 · answer #7 · answered by elmar66 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
I agree with you completely that the ideal situation is a stay at hoem parent, whichever parent that may be. But also that parents have to do what they have to do both for sanity and because teh world we live in is far LESS than ideal.
2007-02-11 10:17:13 · answer #8 · answered by Betsy 7 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Honestly my idea of an ideal family lifestyle is a family made up of either a mom and a dad, just a mom, just a dad, a mom and a mom or a dad and a dad, or two moms and a dad, or two dads and a mom...etc. who love respect and care for their children completely and do whatever they have decided is in the best interests of the kids. Whether working or staying home, love your kids and understand that you need to teach them that differences are what make people wonderful and unique, arm them with the ability to make decisions and trust that they will be able to.
2007-02-11 10:16:37 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 3⤊ 5⤋
The ideal family life style is "Putting GOD first in all you do that your plans will succeed.
2007-02-11 10:20:54 · answer #10 · answered by windwalker 3 · 3⤊ 6⤋