its like no matter what i try, i always just seem to be "just a close friend type." i use to be very forward and wanting to get to know the girl before i ask them on a date, but that always got me a "we're just friends." so i started the "laid back approach" where i dont make alot of advances, i just talk to them and let what happen, happen and maybe once i thought things were going good i'd ask them out on a date, but that never really worked either, because either they hook with someone else or i was "too much a friend type." now ladies, doesn't every woman want a guy that'll listen, that will talk to them and be there for them? what am i doing wrong here??
2007-02-11 09:10:57 · 10 answers · asked by jake p 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, you have to create attraction. You have to flirt with them and let them know that you're interested, but you can't give up all of your power, that's not attractive.
2007-02-11 09:16:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I date with NO attachment. The guys who get too far into my personal life will only be my friends as my romantic interests must maintain some mystery.
If you are putting yourself out there as a shoulder, a confidant, a support system, you are making a mistake. At least that's not what I want. I have girlfriends for that. I want a man I can flirt with, who I can be feminine with, who doesn't know all my business, who I can still have some fantasy with, at least untill the attraction builds. The trick is to do it sloooowly.
You ask her about herself but don't get involved in her life. Reveal yourself but only the best stuff and be masculine. Stand off a little. Use more body language than verbal. Then, date several women at the same time. Don't sleep with all of them, of course. And be honest with them that you are "dating around", but there is something attractive about a man who is slightly unavaiable, somewhat terminally single. I know it sounds almost mean and if it just isn't you don't do it. But if you can have some fun with being a single guy and being friends with women and flirting and not getting serious then be a little bit of the bad boy. Try on a few different attitudes and see where it gets you. You are going to make a wonderful partner for a woman when she is ready for a serious relationship, I promise, and you are just the kind of guy I would want, so there is nothing wrong with you. But if you would like to have more choices and more dates and more fun for now, you just might want to change your approach and attitude a little.
2007-02-11 09:32:56 · answer #2 · answered by Ande 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are wrong. Maybe you wait too long before you ask them out. Let them get to know you and you know them in a more romantic manner but also showing them the guy that listens and is there for them. That way you will be able to surprise them with small romantic jesters based on things they have said to you about favorite likes and you will know dislikes. It wouldn't have to be anything big. Sometimes those little things when you are building a relationship can be so special.
Good Luck. You will find 'Her'
2007-02-11 09:19:17 · answer #3 · answered by Margaret K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing you are doing wrong. be patient. there will be a girl who will accept you for it. i know what girls mean when they say "too much of a friend type" because i have said that to a few guys. its a thing where they dont want to hurt you. but to us it feels like no matter what we do we are going to hurt a guy anyway. just be patient. thats what i am. ive been single for almost a year now. and im looking for a serious relationship where i feel secure.
2007-02-11 09:17:16 · answer #4 · answered by jCt //* 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think maybe u do that too much. If a guy did that alot then I would think of him(them) as "just friend(s). But maybe if ur not too laid back and not too friendish then ur set. I have more to say that would really help IM me or msg me l8er sk8er
2007-02-11 09:16:31 · answer #5 · answered by hot-rocker chick-punk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not dong anything wrong. Yes girls love a guy that will listen and be there for them. You just haven't found the right kind of girl yet. Keep your hopes up, it'll happen before you know it!
2007-02-11 09:17:26 · answer #6 · answered by cnm 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
apparently women like to see you in the friend rather than as romantic material. You need to show them your romantic side and change there opinion of you. So dont be put off by their first refusal. Show them you can be romantic.
2007-02-11 09:17:53 · answer #7 · answered by wally 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're doing nothing wrong. either they're not interested in you or do truly feel like a close friend/brother
2007-02-11 09:15:08 · answer #8 · answered by Laura 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing at all. You happen to find the wrong girls!
2007-02-11 09:22:49 · answer #9 · answered by anna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
FLIRT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-11 09:15:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋