I have a step child that me and my husband had desided to both raise him and for me to treat him as my own. we were making all the choices but all of a sudden his mom got involved and she is telling him how to raise kaden(his son). he is believing her and is doing what she says. He now want listen to me at all. but expects me to do what his mom says and i dont agree with any of it. should i just back off and tell him to raise his son on his own or what. and standing up to his mom is not an option because eric my husband wont let me. please help.
2007-02-11 08:44:27 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Don't sink to playing her at her stupid control games. Just continue to act how you always do and build a relationship with him. Leave it to your husband to make the major desisions until you really feel like his parent. Also you need to make sure you and you husband agree on house rules and kaden must follow them whilst in your house. Make sure your husband backs you up when kaden misbehaves, and make sure he knows what will happen when he does misbehave eg taking away privelages. Have a civil meeting and explain your stratagey to his mum, try to compormise and assure her you are not trying to undermine her. explain that you she and your husband all have the same motive. You want Kaden to be happy and well cared for. Be firm and follow through punishments but don't show kaden anger, stay calm no matter what he says, or it will build resentment. good luck.xx
2007-02-11 08:52:04 · answer #1 · answered by Londonbaby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a tricky situation.....and in the best interests of your child and marriage, you need to find a way to work through this....she is the MOM, and legally, you have no rights....but I think it is unfair of your husband to totally turn his back on your ideas now that MOM is showing an interest....so you need to talk with him and find out where the line is being drawn, by him. Maybe there are some ways you can incorporate or compromise the two parenting ways????
2007-02-11 09:06:59 · answer #2 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a difficult situation . Just sit down and talk to your husband. I know its hard to Deal with the mothers input but she is the mother so you have to be open minded. Im sure its not that he wont listen to you at all, maby it just feels that way now. You have to keep an open mind here or you may create a situation that theres no turning back from. Good luck
2007-02-11 08:51:12 · answer #3 · answered by osu_fanz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gosh that's damaging. i'm a step parent yet luckily their mom in no way interferes. to no longer me besides. Now she does inspire the youngsters to get funds from their father consistently regardless of each and all the help funds he supplies her. besides, no longer something like what your experiencing. She is amazingly jealous of you, maximum suitable factor for her is to discover her very own guy. i can purely think of what that youngster could hear approximately the two you and her father from that vicious woman. Its a ask your self why the youngster even likes you. i would not answer her calls ever!! And in the event that they are threatening then you definitely i could get a restraining order. Your husband needs to take this heavily and choose what he needs to do approximately her. Wow good success with this.
2016-10-01 23:37:50 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am a stepchild myself. fortunately for me that my step-dad, whom from now on i will call my dad for he has helped mom raise me for the last 15.5 years. my biological father understood the rules that mom had for us and he had very similar rules. when my dad (step-dad) married mom, they had an agreement that if there were any rules that were not followed with either them or my biological father, we would be punished (grounded). mind you, my parents (mom and step-dad) and my biological father and later my stepmother didn't always see eye to eye, but came to the agreement that any one of us 3 kids didn't follow the rules, we'd get grounded.
I'd say, sit down with your husband and explain to him how you feel.....your stepson doesn't respect you, etc. don't let him interrupt you, just finish and ask him to think about you had said for a few days and come back and discuss it. if he agrees with you, than sit down with him and his ex. if he doesn't try to set up a time that you can meet with his ex so you can explain to her that you're not trying to be the better mother, but trying to help raise him to the person that he can be and that you care for her son, love him and want what's best for him.
2007-02-11 08:57:28 · answer #5 · answered by Laura 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your home - your marriage. The ex has no say in your home unless there is cause to be concerned about the child's safety.
2007-02-12 01:19:43 · answer #6 · answered by GoodQuestion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your husband about how you feel this could drive a serious wedge between you.
2007-02-11 11:29:15 · answer #7 · answered by chiefs fan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U SHOULD FEEL LIKE **** BECAUSE UR PARENTS DONT LOVE U CAUSE UR NOT EVEN THERE REAL DAUGHTER AND GOOD LUCK
2007-02-15 07:08:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take it in.
2007-02-11 08:47:00 · answer #9 · answered by singelcutie11 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋