Please Help!!?

Question

Well im a 16 yr old boy and I need some help on how to tell my parents that I like the same sex and how I feel deeply about being the opposite gender. I am feeling really depressed keeping my feelings in every day and it is getting really hard and some times I get suicide thoughts. I would like to know how to tell my parents and what to expect from telling them. Also parents that answer how would you feel about this if I was you son. Please help! and thanks in advance for the help.

Answer 1

I would advise you to not tell your parents (or anyone else for that matter) UNTIL you have had a chance to speak with someone who can help you deal with this. There are a lot of great groups out there, http://www.pflag.org/ among them. PFLAG can give you the help and resources you need to make the best out of "coming out" to your family. They can help prepare you for what kind of response you may get and they can provide you with literature to give to your family that my help them better understand your homosexuality or transgenderedness. Searching for a local gay teen support group in your area is also a good idea. If you were my child, I would love and support you in all that you are and would be concerned only for your happiness. Please seek out help from others like you. You are not alone out there! Good luck and take care.

Answer 2

Be patient. Keep in mind that you're still young, and that there may be a day when you realize that there might be a woman that you find stimulating. And your orientation is nothing to feel suicidal about; it's who you are, and it's natural, so don't be depressed by it, okay? Things often work out over time, so don't worry.

However, if you feel you must tell your parents, I've found that it's best to wait until an appropriate time to do so. When you do come out and tell them, whatever you do, don't back down; you've made the decision, and it's up to everyone to live with it, like it or not. If your parents really care about you, as I believe parents are supposed to, they'll probably take it with a dollop of sugar and leave it. If you're not sure how they'll take it, wait until you let them know. Timing is critical.

Good luck.

Answer 3

I'm sure they will be a little stand offish afraid of saying the wrong thing. It really depends on how open minded or religious they are in terms of accepting it. Just sit them down, tell them that something has really been bothering you so much so your depressed and could use their support. Then break it to them gently. Do not have any expectations. Just let them react the way they feel necessary they deserve the right to say what they feel just as you do. Then give them time to accept it. As a mother I would be understanding only because I teach my child not to judge others. I'm very open minded. Everyone however is different. Just give them time they will come around they will soon realize if not immediately that holding a grudge over this is not worth loosing a son over. Best wishes!

Answer 4

well, to begin with I have a son and there is nothing that he could say to me that would make me disown him. though warning your parents will be shocked, most likely your father. expect them to not understand at first, that way if they are perfectly ok with it then you planned for the worst. STOP THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE!!!! I cannot stress that more, comeing from a woman who once tried and luckily failed, that will hurt your parents 100000 X as much as telling them your sexual preference. Plus they would blame themselves and you really dont want that I'm sure. Sitting down and telling them might not be for you, I'm sure your very scared another idea might be to write them a letter, not to much detail at first, but tell them that this is the person you are and the will accept that because they love you. Good Luck and believe me they will be ok and you will be ok.

Answer 5

This is going to be difficult for you. I'd make sure that you have a friend to turn to, in case things don't turn out the way they should.

Any parent SHOULD tell you that it's perfectly OK, and that they'll always love you and support you.

Unfortunately, parents are human beings ... and they sometimes make mistakes. If they are upset at first, it could just be that they need time to adjust. Please don't blame yourself or think that you've done something wrong. Just understand that they may need some time to get used to the idea.

Good luck!

Answer 6

You poor little lamb
There will be a time when you can hold your head high and not give a stuff what anyone thinks,
But for now do they need to know, you are only 16 and you have a couple of years yet before they start hassling you about girlfriends,
I'm a parent, but I have girls,
If they told me the same thing as you I'd advise them to not listen to anyone else, but just to be certain of their feelings before getting into a relationship.
lots of luck

Answer 7

If you were my son, I'd probably be shocked and surprised, but then maybe not. They've known you your whole life; it might not be so shocking. Have faith in yourself and them. Tell them how you are hurting inside because you have been keeping everything bottled up. Be expecting some sort of shock at first, and give them a little time to have it sink in. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 8

it might depend on how old fashion ur parents are .. i think alot of parents 2 day are more open minded than say 10-20-30 yrs ago ... maybe try telling ur mom .. since its easier and maybe have her tell ur pops

good luck hun ~ u'll feel so much better after telling ur parents than keeping it all inside..

Answer 9

Um, I would sit down with your family and talk about it. If they say it is a phase or something idiotic like, it is just their way of dealing with it. The shock will eventually wear off. They just need time to cope.

Answer 10

Go see your pastor 1st