My mother has a lot of issues. I was taken away from her when I was young and don't see her more than once a year and when I do it turns out very very badly. I try really hard but she is mentally ill.
Is it possible for me to turn out a normal person and not have a relationship with her? I feel like this is too hard for me to deal with. I've tried so hard but I want to die whenever we come in contact. Another thing is I'm so torn because even though she says horrible things to me and has mistreated me, I want to protect her so badly. I want to help her more than anything but I just can't.
Anyone have any advice or similar situations?
2007-02-11 06:52:36 · 11 answers · asked by Sophie 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
OK, Hunny I think that this is a very sad sittuation, you are even making me cry, but the best thing is to let her go. You don't want to suffer all your life, because of your mother.
2007-02-11 06:58:46 · answer #1 · answered by ~*Marie~* 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've gone through almost the same thing. I really don't have a relationship with my mom either. When I was younger she called me all sorts of names and abused me a lot. The only reason why I keep in contact with her is because of my younger brothers. If you have no siblings that live with her, then you should stop talking to her for a while and see how that goes. When you feel ready, if ever, to contact her again then do so.
2007-02-11 15:30:42 · answer #2 · answered by Jaime A 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, the reason you are turning out as a normal person is because you recognize she is mentally ill and you do not want to participate in abnormal behavior. Take a good look at your relationship with her, and decide how much of a relationship (if any) you can have. Set your boundaries as to what kind of treatment you will accept from her, and enforce them. You aren't doing your mom or yourself a favor if you allow her to abuse you.
2007-02-11 15:11:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I always had issues with my mom and felt sorry for her too. She only knew what she knew and tried her best with that.
I look at it as an example of what not to do or how not to act in the future.
Its good that you have many opposite examples to observe.
You'll use those examples to make your self happy in life.
Some people grow up with poor examples and never know any other way. your lucky
I had to runaway to find a family in my friends and discovered several ways of life. Your situation sounds healthier
2007-02-11 15:33:32 · answer #4 · answered by MamaJupe 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is your mother, this is the card you were dealt...take care of her, protect her...if she is mentally ill, does she know how these "horrible things" that she says to you affects you? Regardless, too many of us get selfish, don't fall into this human trap...do everything in your power to help and protect your mother...you only get one mom. Besides, she bore you...no one else did that for you...that is a huge sacrifice within itself...something none of us could ever repay to our mothers.
2007-02-11 15:02:38 · answer #5 · answered by sugarmama 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just be there for her. Listen. Pray and even though she has an illness, I think you are a wonderful person for wanting to try. If she doesn't, don't blame it on yourself. All the best and I'm praying for you,
Cinderella
2007-02-11 14:56:57 · answer #6 · answered by Cinderella 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well like my mom and me hate one another i mean she has tried to kill me and pluse she drinks everyday to the point where she is drunk and cant stand up stright. i dont know what to do i mean i'm tired of tell people that i fall alot and that i run into doors alot i mean theres only one person i've ever told this to and every time this happens he picks me up and i stay with him i mean i'm only 15 and every time this happens i get into trouble with my dad who is the same as my mom.......but as for your problem its ok not to have a relishionship with your mom but hey if u need someone to talk to just email me at blondie1018_06@yahoo.com
2007-02-11 15:05:45 · answer #7 · answered by melly bear 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because she was given the title as mother doesn't mean she earns the title of mother!
2007-02-11 14:59:31 · answer #8 · answered by Celeste P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how old are you? Is she really mentally ill? Just make sure she is safe and comfortable and that will make you feel better about yourself. sometimes mentally ill people know no better. just dont let her drag you down. do what you can then leave.
2007-02-11 14:59:47 · answer #9 · answered by alpatmcg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't know hun it sounds a lot like me and my dad.He once told his boss-man's son that he didn't like it when the girls(me & my sister) came over b/c he didn't have enough money to by groceries and his dope!hang in there it shouolld get better!
2007-02-11 15:00:30 · answer #10 · answered by *girl* w/ *no name* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋