I've been with my girlfriend almost 3 months (but knew her for some time before that), and the relationship started in a fairly dramatic way. She had been dating another guy at the time, and they had been going out for 2 years.
Now we are together and truly love each other, but she tells me her ex keeps sending her emails and bothering her, and really wants to meet. She has asked me if she should meet with him to convince him to leave her alone, and she says she wants to convince her ex that she really loves me.
What do you think I should tell her?
2007-02-10 20:27:12 · 14 answers · asked by acural7 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
and by the way, so as not to mislead with my title...I'm not telling my gf to do anything. She asked for my advice and opinion, and I already told her I love and trust her and she should do what she feels is right. I know she wanted a bit of opinion too, and her ex was a bit of the emotional type, and cried multiple times when she tried to break up with him previously, so I was concerned if she meets him he will go ballistic and not listen to her and not put her in a good situation.
So I told her to do what she thinks is right, but just to be careful that meeting him to tell him off might make him more upset that than ignoring him or doing it by phone or email...
2007-02-10 21:18:01 · update #1
well you know what.. it's up to you if you really trust her or not. you said that you two love each other and if she's willing to tell her ex that she loves you and that its over with him then i say, theres not (much) harm in that.
i think love is based on mutual trust and you need it to keep it going.. your gf now wants to secure what you two have and tell your ex that so he wont be bothering her anymore which in turn is probably bothering you... and you dont want that, especially when you guys are going so well. you dont need distractions, especially when neither of u are interested in anyone else but each other.
if it was me, i'd let my boyfriend talk to my ex.. if she says that's what she's going to say, then trust her on it and let her use her ways to tell him she loves you now... she loves you this much, i doubt she'd want to betray you.. if worse comes to worse, which i hope never will.. then you know she wasnt for you.. as much as you loved her, she wasnt worth your love BUT i doubt that will happen.. she was honest to you about the emails and how they bother her AND the fact she wants to meet which is a pretty open minded way of telling you things and she sounds like she wants you two to work.. so maybe just her have this talk. base ur relationship just for now on a whole lot of trust and love..
good luck!! =]
2007-02-10 20:37:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1
2016-05-25 09:54:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are like me!! except my GF ex doesnt bother her. She also was with him for 2 years, and im with her now 6 happy months.
Here is my advice since u and i have a lot in common in this relationship. If she truly loves you, just trust her. Just let her tell him to leave her alone. And if that doesnt do any good, and he keeps bothering her, you and ur GF should just ignore him.
U love her! and she loves you! nothing to worried about :]
PS. If he keeps bothering her, u go to him and kick his ****. Aim for the throat, knees and a kick or punch in his stomach.
2007-02-10 20:44:53 · answer #3 · answered by Marty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of, what is it that you think you can allow? As if you are her master? Come on, if she wanted to meet him she would do it behind your back and you would never have known.
The fact that she has shared this with you so openly means that she is someone who you can trust, so prove it. Trust her, and ask her to do what she feels is best. And if she goes off to meet him, offer her your support and understanding. He is an ex for a reason, and that reason is still there. You only stand to win, you either loose someone who is unfaithful or you gain her admiration and deep respect.
2007-02-10 20:41:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! If she really wants to convince him to leave her alone she will ignore all emails and all other attempts at making contact with her. It would seem to me that her wanting to meet him is just that, her wanting to meet him. Cut your losses and get out now. She isn't ready to move on. Good luck friend.
2007-02-10 20:32:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not to meet with him because thats just encouraging the ex to think there is hope. She doesnt have to meet with him in person to tell him anything she can do it on the phone.
2007-02-10 20:32:18 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Lin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I reallt hink it is best for them to meet. As much as it would hurt you if she went back to him, it is alot better to find out now rather than later. Just support her and tell her you trust her (which I hope you do) and she will do the right thing.
2007-02-10 20:30:38 · answer #7 · answered by soxy 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Should you let her? I hope that was a poor choice of words only. I wouldn't ask for your permission, I would tell you that I was going and what time I would be back if it interfered with our plans.
2007-02-10 20:32:44 · answer #8 · answered by patti duke 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is not advisable. Don't be silly. Never let your gf meet her ex!
2007-02-10 23:09:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her your ex has been doing the same and you think both of you should go and meet your ex`es to sort issues out.
2007-02-10 20:31:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋