spanking question.?

Question

What is this big deal with spanking? I am sick of it. I believe this is why kids act this way. I never remember kids acting like this until these numb brained people took control. What is so abusive about a spanking. I'm not saying spank your child everytime he or she does something wrong. But when needed, what's wrong with it? I never want to have to spank my kids but what else are you supposed to do? Time-out? I would have laughed at it when I was young. I seen a boy and agirl the other day at kmart. hiding from their mother. The mother thought they were kidnapped or something. When she finally found them, she told them not to do it again or they would get timeout when they got home. When I got home I told my mother what happened. I asked what if I would have done that when I was that age. (8-12). She told me that if that was her and I she would have taken me to the restroom, pulled my pants down and turned my butt red. Why don't these parents do this now?

Answer 1

mmmmm hmmm!! ! 100% with you on this one.

Answer 2

They've been convinced by all the nonsense out there. About the only people that speak out in favor of spanking are Christians (correct me if I'm wrong), and if people aren't Christians, they tend to listen to "the world," which is almost exclusively against spanking.

But I agree--it's really dumb. I mean, apply the same principle to criminals: no jail time, just--what, community service and fines? Pretty soon you've got chaos.

Yes, some spanking is done wrong. The solution to that is training on how and when to spank, not the prohibition of it.

Those kids were 8 and 12? A spanking should have been only the start of their punishment! But they're already very far gone.

Thanks for this question!

Sorry, Kirstin, but kids are different. I'm glad you and your daughter didn't need spanking, but some kids just do. People are different. Some people obey the law because they just want to; some because of the threat of jail; some because they don't want to go to jail again, and some never do.

Answer 3

I'm with you 100%, having raised three kids. I am very proud of the way they turned out and the relationship we have. They got spanked when they deserved it and they got rewards when they deserved it. It works.

Look around you at the pathetic parenting going on now and the truly dangerous and unmanageable children in the schools. This has only been occurring since corporal punishment became a bad thing. Its getting worse every day. I sure am glad to know there are these workable alternatives out there. When they start getting used and society improves again I'll be the first to stand up and cheer. Until then, as far as I can tell, the anti spanking crowd is a bunch of flakes.

Answer 4

I have 2 kid's. One I spanked and the other I used time out. Not all kid's learn when spanked to be better and therefore time out is used and can work just as effectively. It is difficult if you don't spank your child and you are having trouble with them in public. I once pinched my child in public (the time out child) for running under the clothes racks and hiding from me. He then screamed out loud that I pinched him and it hurt. I was embarrassed and left the area. To me that didn't work and I do threaten them to take them to the bathroom if they don't straighten up and that works. I have done it once and there afraid I'll do it again. I have to say I have seen parents slap there kid's in the face or on the head or in the arm's and I feel this is wrong. Parent's don't know there strength and should think about how it would feel to be hit like that!

Answer 5

I agree with you that there are plenty of parents who don't spank their kids, but also don't properly teach them right from wrong. But spanking is not the only way to discipline successfully.The reason I don't spank is simple: It doesn't work any better than time outs. Spanking gives faster result with forced and immediate cessation of the act. But the time out child (if done properly) will learn to think about why he/she shouldn't have done something vs. not doing it where the spanker will find out. It's better to raise kids who'll still behave when there is no threat of violence and even if no one will find out.
I was never spanked and I appreciated it so much that I don't spank my kids. I have an outstanding relationship with my mom and dad and my kids have the same respectful and friendly relationship with me. My kid's teachers often ask me how I discipline my kids because they've never met kids who are more honest and own up to their mistakes. I attribute this to the fact that they never feel fear and feel completely safe being honest. The honesty then leads to compliance and it's long term.
There is a BIG difference between no spanking and not disciplining.

Answer 6

Despite the screams of abuse if you spank a child, I think it can be necessary. I found my older daughter would push and push and push the boundaries... each time pushing further... eventually she would do something that needed to be punished. I spanked her twice. Once she said, after we were done, "Thanks Mommy I needed that." My hand usually hurt more than the bottom!

Usually I found other ways to punish. Once, I spanked her for doing something outrageous. While she napped after, I went into her room and removed every single toy. Bread and water for dinner. She was not allowed to participate in the Peace Parade the next day. Had to stay in her room. She was 7. When she woke up from her nap, her room was back to normal and her favourite meal was up for dinner. That was big time punishment and only happened once. Neither did the crime. (Rubbing bubble gum into my newly reupholstered nursing chair because she did not like the new baby. Then pouring dish soap on the seat!)

One of the problems in America now is that parents have had their power stripped from them. Spank a child and they can scream abuse. Spanking must be very very very rare for it to be effective. Although I have been known to swat the bottom of a runaway toddler... not that they feel it much.

It should, however, be a last resort.

When my kids were older, they made their own punishments. Amazingly, they were often 3X as hard on themselves as I would have been! A few times I would have the one decide the punishment for the other. I had to be creative. The younger watched the older and NEVER even acted up. She learned from observation.

Answer 7

Many parents have the fear their children will not love/like them and so won't spank. Also, parenting "experts", government, and other parents make people feel guilty and ashamed for choosing spanking as a punishment rather than letting each parent choose their style of parenting.

I was spanked as was my husband and we will spank my son. When spankings are necessary, we will talk to him about what he did and how to change that behavior and YES he should fear spankings, but not his parents - and if done correctly that will be the case.

For all those people who scream VIOLENCE about spanking, think about this - people who are physically unhealthy turn to surgical procedures to save them. Surgery is among the most violent acts that can occur to the human body, yet it is done in order to protect or save the body. This is the philosophy behind spanking - if done correctly. In the end it trains a child as to what is safe and right before they are able to reason it through. (And it proven a child's brain - through adolescence - cannot reason as an adult's.)

Answer 8

I agree with you. When a kid does something particularly bad or dangerous, a spanking sends a good message. I put my 2 year old in time out most of the time, but if she really does something deserving, I spank her, and I don't feel bad or anything. Heck, she's still in diapers, so she has a nice cushion! I guess why parents don't do this now is that we're a "kinder, gentler" nation. Also, we have particulary sharp kids who call family services if mommy or daddy lays a hand on them. Sigh...

Answer 9

For one what are you teaching a child by spanking them you are there role models if you hit them they think it is OK to hit. First you start with a little hit then whats next when they dont listen beating them to death. There our other kinds of discipline it needs to be related to the topic such as If a child doesn't want to get dressed in the morning make them go in there PJ's to school than they will be embarrassed or my son wouldn't eat dinner so I maid him go to bed without eating next time he thought twice before refusing to eat. They have to be able to learn from there mistakes hitting them when they do something wrong doesn't teach them anything. In the real world you don't get hit every time you do something wrong let them learn in a positive way from there mistakes.

Answer 10

haha, I love how people say "The world was just fine until people stopped spanking." That doesn't make any sense whatsoever. For one thing, 90% of parents still spank (actual, not made up statistic). So you have a 90% chance that those kids you are seeing misbehave ARE spanked.

Spanking is actually a very poor form of discipline. It teaches kids only what NOT to do, not what TO do in place of the bad behavior. It also doesn't teach kids good behavior--just to not get caught in bad behavior.

To go on the extreme, most people in prison were abused. So, no, while a little spanking probably isn't going to hurt too much, you are still on the spectrum of physical punishment. To say "It didn't hurt me" is illogical as well. Most people who smoke DON'T get cancer. So should we therefore teach our kids to smoke? Saying nothing bad happened to you over something means absolutely nothing. Guess what I learned from spanking? How to lie to avoid pain. Also, we would NEVER "spank" an adult who was misbehaving, although there are quite a few I would like to! :) Spanking just shows power and teaches your kids to obey out of fear of consequences, not out of understanding that what they are doing is wrong.

As far as children who misbehave and are not spanked, a lot of that is a lack of consistant discipline. You get that with kids who ARE spanked, too. A parent who lovingly provides discipline appropriate to the offense on a consistant basis (which does NOT mean letting them get away with stuff, especially running off in the store which is potentially dangerous) statistically has the best outcome.


Most people like supernanny and she achieves her results without EVER spanking.

Answer 11

DEAR
HERE IS THE ANSWER AND I AGREE WITH YOU ALL THE WAY THE GOVERNMENT STICKS ITS NOSE IN WHERE IT DOES NOT BE LONG SPANKING IS GOOD FOR THE KIDS OK. HAVE YOU SEEN KIDS AFTER THE 50,S 60,S 70,S 80, 93 AFTER 1993 KIDS WENT DOWN HILL I GRADUATED IN 1991 AND AFTER 93 THERE WAS STEALING ETC BECAUSE PARENTS JUST DO NOT CARE LIKE THE OLD TIME PARENTS DID ABOUT US. ALAN JACKSON HAS A SONG REMEMBER WHEN AND LITTLE BITTY SPEAR THE ROD AND SPOIL THE CHILD READ THE GOOD BOOK