I've known my boyfriend for over 5 years, but we've only been together officially for about a month, and we dated for a few months before we became officially together. I've liked him since I met him and it took him 5 years to realize how he felt about me. I mean, I know I still have feelings for him. I dunno. I don't miss him half the time, but I still have feelings for him. I really don't know how I feel or what to do. Is it possible that I've just gotten too comfortable around him and he's just sortof missed his chance with me? Or that I'm in love with him and am so comfortable around him that I missed the first love experiences because I was too busy chasing him and he was too busy running? So its like we've been married forever and were just comfortable? I'm not sure what I'm asking, but what do you guys think I should do?
2007-02-10 15:03:25 · 6 answers · asked by Chickiedoo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Everyone needs different things in a relationship. Some girls need to feel like they're head-over-heels... some would rather opt for being comfortable.
Just because you're super comfortable with him doesn't mean you don't love him. I've been with my bf almost 2 years, we're inseperable, comfortable, and committed to eachother but neither one of us really believe in the idea of being "in love". He might have said it best when he said that love is finding someone you can stand to be around for more than ten minuets at a time. I'm a very independant person and knowing that being with him is a choice and not something that is influenced by a rush of feelings that I don't completely understand is more suited to my personality. I know it doesn't sound really romantic, but we're not an extreemely romantic couple and neither of us need that.
But like I said, some people do.
If you don't feel fulfilled, then the relationship isn't worth bothering with. I'm a firm believer in not wasting anyones time. So if you are having any thoughts about getting out of the relationship talk to him about it. You have to keep in mind that what you missed out on is not his fault and you have to be mature enough to never hold that against him. You need to ask yourself if you love him or you love the thought of loving him. 5 years is a long time to chase after someone and eventually a lot of people fall in love with the idea of being in love.
The easiest way to judge a relationship is to picture where you want to see yourself down the road and to assess whether or not he fits into the picture.
2007-02-10 15:16:40 · answer #1 · answered by nobodysangel_nobodysfool 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not give your age but you may like him and have feelings for him but was it LOVE-only you can really know that.You need to sit and discuss this with him in a gentle and feeling manner for Like and Love are NOT the same and if its Not Love then being around him all the time will be tedious for the Pssion is Not there. Being in Love and Comfortable does not equat the same as boredom for if you love then you should feel comfortable. Being together for only a month and dating sev mos and the Passion being gone already is not a indication of Love .Perhaps you were drawn to him more in a Physical attraction and then the excitement of the pursuit but now there isn't much substance for physical atttractions level off. Talk to him for if its NOT there then why be together-Life is short and while you are in a mediocre relationship Oppotunities for a Hot,Sizzling Love may be passing you by. But if Love is there with him then by you two talking am sur you can find ways to add spice . Perhaps you aren't involved enough,do not do enough together for Love has to be fed in orer to grow for doesn;'t just live on its own
2007-02-10 15:17:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be comfort. I would ask myself what I really wanted in a relantionship and if your dating him because you want to go to the next step or your just too comfortable.
2007-02-10 15:08:36 · answer #3 · answered by di12381 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a difference between having feelings for someone and loving someone. If your not sure if you love him or not than you dont love him, because if you did than you wouldn't have had to ask.
2007-02-10 15:12:11 · answer #4 · answered by Blueberry. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take a break from him and if you miss him and fell like you cant go on...there it is you love him and need him in your life..don't pass that up!!! if you dont well he is better off a friend!
2007-02-10 15:08:25 · answer #5 · answered by tweedy778 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can't tell you if you love him
2007-02-10 15:06:35 · answer #6 · answered by Konrad 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋