I work with a woman who never says good morning when she come in the office.?

Question

And she always gives me and the other woman I work with dirty looks. She always looks like she is angry and she slams the desk draws and cabinets and telephone. When she intercoms you, you can hear her huffing and puffing because she is annoyed. How do you deal with someone like this????

Answer 1

Ignore her.

Answer 2

This is a hard one.
Number one... Her attitude is hers. She probably has problems that you have no idea of.
If you let her get to you, then her attitude problem becomes your problem and is no longer hers. You give her too much power by worrying about her grumpiness.
You must hold your own good attitude. Be cheery toward her, and smile.When you smile no one knows what you are really thinking. Tell her good morning no matter what.
And above all do not mirror her or she wins.
Remember there is a pay off in it for her somewhere. Don't let yourself be that pay off.
Some people are born Sociopath's.
If this is the case for this lady...don't expect her to change. Expect her to be grumpy, mean and hateful. She will be just nice enough to keep you drawn in. ((Something like a cat playing with a mouse))
It is a strange thing to wrap your head around, but there are more people in therapy from working and living with sociopaths then you could believe.
There s a book named something like .." Know the Sociopath living next door?" It is said that there is one in every 25 people.
It may benefit you to check it out at the Library just to see if that is what you are dealing with. At least it will give you an insight and tools to benefit you.
There is always going to the super. to lodge a formal complaint too.

Good Luck to you...

Answer 3

WoW!!! Well I thought MY husband was a mommas boy! You have married yourself to a very immature mommas boy. The bible even says a man is to leave his parents and cleave to his wife. You can't live as a married couple and make a family if he only wants to be up under his momma forever. Is he still breastfeeding? Maybe thats why he is there all the time LOL. Sorry but for real, you will spend the rest of your marriage in competition with his mother if you don't put a stop to it now. I'm dealing with that now and its a no win situation. I definitely think you need to consider other options and look for a man who is more on your level.

Answer 4

Realize that she is a person and that her attitude has nothing to do with you and everything to do with what is going on in her life. Chances are good that she isn't really giving anyone "dirty looks" at all. Sometimes when people are stressed or concentrating or otherwise have a lot on their minds, they get a look on their face that could appear like a "dirty look" and might not be directed at anyone at all.

Be nice to her. Treat her with kindness. Say hello to her and don't worry about whether or not she says hello back. Don't talk with others about her behind her back. Chances are good that she will respond well to kindness, but even if she doesn't, you will know that you are doing your part. You can bet there will be other people who will annoy her more than you do.

Answer 5

From the question header I thought she just wasn't a morning person -I'm like that when I have to start early!- but the rest seems to apply to her behaviour all day... she has some serious issues, but I don't know if there' s much you can do about it. Trying to avoid her only for the first hour won't work in this case! Ignore it, don't let yourself get angry too and hope she'll either quit or get over whatever it is that's causing her stress.

Answer 6

Is there anyone here who doesn't have issues? Some people talk about them and others hold them in. My guess is that she is unaware of her mannerisms. But I know the type very well.

Don't do anything. Don't let her know that she has dampened your day. Don't let her know that her body language is coming across loud and clear. Don't let her know that she makes you uncomfortable. Her attitude and her productivity - or lack thereof - is not your responsibility.

Do continue to say good morning to her. Do compliment something she is wearing. Do tell her to have a good evening when she leaves work. Kindness is infectious. If everyone practices this, she'll start to melt.

Don't expect an overnight miracle. These things take time.

Answer 7

she is just an antisocial or/and autistic person. I don't see the reason to be not nice with such people, just be yourself.

I don't like judging, you never know the reason the person behaves this or that way. Even a lady like this, she must have had a trauma in the past, there is no other explanation.
I know it is hard, especially when someone talks like this on the phone, but be nice.

Tell you the truth I don't say good morning very often too, but i do that because i am shy and think that they didn't notice me.

Answer 8

It is always best to try your best to ignore her and remember that her attitude could not be solely nor personally geared toward you. Although she may make you uncomfortable or even angry with her attitude try to consider there may be many reasons for her view of the world and her life. Do your best to smile and enjoy yours. Never allow others to steal your joy by slamming things or huffing or your enemies will make you their sole target. If at all possible wear earphones and stay focused on the task at hand.

Answer 9

Sounds like passive aggressive behavior on her part. I am assuming this is a co-worker and not a boss.

People who are passive-aggressive have anger and frustrations that they can't find a healthy way to resolve. The passive-aggressive behavior is a way for them to get power in a relationship where they feel they have none. In this case, the power she is getting is from putting you and your other co-worker on pins and needles, walking on eggshells around her for fear she will "blow up".

It is not your job to "fix" her. But if her behavior is causing stress for in the workplace for you, then you can elect to try to open the lines of communication with her. I suggest being completely open and transparent about how you feel when she is acting out. If she looks upset about something, ask her about it immediately. That takes away the "passive" payoff for her to allow her to keep doing it. Just be genuine and compassionate, e.g. "Susie, you seem very upset. Is there anything wrong? Are you feeling alright today? Would you like to go for a latte and talk for a few minutes?" See if this gets you anywhere with her. You may find out what's really troubling her, and she will be happy to have someone to be honest with.

Answer 10

Have you tried talking to her? Has she done something to you personally? I don't think it's right to immediately complain to management about her yet. For one, you don't know what her problem is. She may be dealing with some extremely personal issues. She may be angry on the outside, but she may hurting terribly on the inside. I would simply talk to her and ask her if everything is okay. You may be surprised. She may open up to you. Maybe she just needs someone to listen. We've all been in that situation.

Answer 11

I've worked with several people like that. Most of them I just ignore, and concentrate on doing my work. We had an assistant manager like that and everyone was afraid of her, even the boss. If you were too nice to her, she'd take advantage of that and then stab you in the back later. I just talk to the people who want to talk to me, and the rest, I don't bother with! I figure if they want to say hi, they know where I sit!