better dog..?

Question

Today my dad and I went to the city Humane society and we looked at a couple small dogs, And i fell in love with two, one was extremely cute and one was calm,quiet,and cute all together, so we got the calm one. When we got home, She got a name and then, whenever we try to pick her up or pet her, she backs away and hides, nobody here has hit her I want to exchange her for the other one, but don't want to hurt her feelings OR my dad's what do i do? help!

Answer 1

Give her some time. She's in a brand-new environment, she doesn't know what's happening to her, and who knows what she went through before she ended up at the Humane Society.

Give her a little time to adjust and learn that you're not going to hit her or hurt her or dump her, and she should hopefully come out of her shell.

I've transported some dogs that were nearly catatonic when I picked them up from the pound and drove them to the vet, and after they adjusted and learned to trust again, they were wonderful, outgoing, friendly dogs.

Answer 2

A dog is a committment... you take the bad with the good. If you're not up for that, then you shouldn't have a dog at all.

Just like any relationship, it takes time - sometimes a few hours, sometimes a few months. But when that bond forms, it'll all be more than worth it.

That being said... she's been locked in a cage for awhile, probably... and you don't know what happened to her before you got her. Maybe someone DID hit her. Give her time... how would you feel if you were abused, then locked in a cage, then suddenly moved to a strange place with strange people? You'd be scared. Dogs have feelings like people... Just give her lots of attention without coddling her, and give her time... she'll warm up to you. My dog was the same, actually. He was 9 weeks old and had already been shifted to 7 different homes (and probably had been hit)... The first day, he wouldn't even look at me. He'd cower and look like he was about to cry. He didn't show any interest in anyone, and seemed very sad. The next morning, he was sitting by the front door, ready to leave. That entire day, he seemed confused that he was still around and getting attention - still removed and distant, but he realised something was different. The NEXT morning... well, I woke up to him atop my bed, standing over me, staring down at me, and wagging his tail. I got up, he started jumping around and barking, and we played all day. And since that day, we've been inseparable for 12 years now.

Give her time.

The fact that you're concerned about hurting her feelings says a lot (I think that's great... and she'll probably have a very good home).

EDIT: To the person below who said dogs don't have feelings... b***s**t! That's such a pompous, cop-out, heartless attitude. Anyone who has a dog (and actually pays attention to the dog) can see that they have feelings. And for the age old debate... there's actually scientific research supporting that dogs' brains respond to emotional stimuli in the same humans' do (ie: they have feelings). Why would an animal who can't feel be scared (fear is a FEELING)? Ugh, some people are so stupid and heartless.

Answer 3

she may have had a really rough time before she was taken to the shelter and then shelters can be really scary too all the noise and other dogs, imho you really need to give her lots of time ( like a month) start by giving her a safe place like a crate that will smell like you put some old unwashed clothes in it and maybe a blanket that you've used over it and she will begin to think of that smell (you) as safe
also confine the areas she can go like a cpl rooms where you spend time doing things {not focused on her ;) } put her crate in there so she has a safe spot and just let her get used to being around you reward her any time she comes up to you, when she does approach you don't make any sudden moves or loud noises that could scare her
then giving her treats for lots of stuff any time she comes to you coming if you call her name letting you get close to her, the list goes on and on
it will probably take at least a week or two for her to get more used to you

if you really think she might not be the right dog for you call and talk the the humane society first ask them for suggestions and work on those suggestions before giving up :)

good luck, adopting a dog is a great thing you did, just give her the time to show you how great she is

Answer 4

This dog has been through an incredibly stressful experience, from going into the shelter, and then coming into a new home, especially if the new home is full of excited people all crowding around and trying to handle her. That can be very intimidating to any dog. Give her some time to adapt, and her true personality will come out. For now, don't try to pick her up or grab her - get some treats and hold them in your hand, and allow her to come to you. Speak calmly and quietly, and don't stare directly into her eyes - that's very threatening to dogs. When she comes to you and you want to pet her, lean away from her instead of over her, and pet her chest and back, not her head. Once she's learned that you are not going to hurt her, she should come out of her shell and be more outgoing.

Here's a good article about bonding with your dog:
http://www.veterinarypartner.com/Content.plx?P=A&A=1669&S=1&SourceID=47

And helping a dog overcome fears:
http://www.veterinarypartner.com/Content.plx?P=A&A=1612&S=1&SourceID=47

Timid dogs:
http://www.veterinarypartner.com/Content.plx?P=A&A=1391&S=1&SourceID=47

About shy dogs:
http://www.goof.com/~pmurphy/shy-k9s-faq.html

If you give her some time to adjust and she still seems genuinely shy, sit down and talk with your family about it. A truly shy dog requires patience and commitment, and if you honestly feel that you don't have the right home for a shy dog, go back to the shelter & discuss the problem with the adoption staff. Having a dog is a big commitment, so it's important that you choose a dog who will fit in well with your family. A good shelter staff will do their best to insure that adopters & dogs are a good match, so they should be willing to work with you - either by helping you work with the shy dog, or to find a better match for your family if you don't think this dog will work out well for you.

Answer 5

Maby you should try telling your dad that you want a dog that you can pet, and play with, and maby you can ask your dad about keeping both. Maby when the shy dog sees how the playful dog acts, and sees all the attention he or she is getting, then the shy dog will perk up! If not, then earn the dogs trust, everyday, lay a treat about 3-ft in front of the dog,then back away another 3-ft(after throwing the treat) and watch patiently, if she doesn't come to get the treat while you are there, then just say "its ok ,i'm not gonna hurt you!" and walk away slowly for 15 min.,then come back and check on her, after doing that for a week, put it a little closer, and so on, and so on. make sure it is confortable in its new home. make sure it gets along with any other pets in the house. and some dogs are affended by certain sex, sometimes male and sometimes female! so maby she is just scared of you, or just of your dad! If you try this and she is still afraid, then you might want to talk to your dad about getting another dog.

Answer 6

You shouldn't take the dog back. Atleast not yet. You have to let the dog get used to you. My friend has a dog and he was afraid at first because before they got him he was abused. Maybe that is what happened with your dog. It may take him a few days to adjust. Thats how all of my animals were but now we are super close. Give him some time. I promise you that if you keep trying that you dog will start to accept you within a week or less. Hope you have fun with your new dog! :-)

Answer 7

I think you should really give this dog a chance. It's very stressful for dogs to be switched around from owner to owner like this. Give it some space and time to get used to your home. Give it lots of water and food available, then slowly approach your dog. Don't have a bunch of people crowded around your dog, this is very scary for a little fellow. I know you're excited, but to the dog, this is very stressful. Talk in a calm voice, and reasure your dog that this is a safe place to be.

If you put in the time and effort for this dog, I guarentee you that this one will be just as rewarding as any other dog, maybe even more. Don't give up! You dog just needs some time getting used to you, just like you need some time getting to know your dog.

Answer 8

She is scared. She is in a new home where she doesnt know anyone and who knows what she has been through before you adopted her. Giver her a few days.........it was almost a week before my puppy stopped doing that ( she did the same thing that you describe your dog doing at first) Dont be so impatient...just hold her in your lap and pet her.......show her love not too much excitement....she will come around

Answer 9

Usually if you show the dog some kind of reward for when she comes near you. Then she won't be afraid of you and will know that you aren't going to hurt her. Just give her some time to get used to you.

Answer 10

My Chihuahua is a rescue. When I first got him he was very shy and withdrawn. He had no personality what so ever! It took quite a while but he opened up more and more. Now he is a happy, delightful little character who loves me like crazy! I love him so much. So just be patient and caring. She will come around.