While in college at 19 i lost my virginity to a very good girl. At the time we were dating. We had sex ONLY ONCE and it really wasn't great. Shortly after we stopped dating and i dropped out of school. WE REMAINED VERY close friends. After two years of of seeing others i come back to school and we start spending lots of time together. I become very attracted to her again but i don't feel the "chemistry" needed for a relationship. I express my feelings to her and she insists on just being friends even though she confesses to be very sexually attracted to me. Recently i find out that she is dating another guy. She seems to be very happy but i can't help being jealous. I WANT to be happy for her because i realise we wouldn't "work" as a couple but i just can't. I feel like i am stuck and am not able to date others until i get past her. Is it possible that losing my virginity was a traumatic event? Is there a name for this? Is there something else i can do to get past her and move on?
2007-02-10 08:00:02 · 5 answers · asked by completely lost 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The fact is this: having relations DOES make you attached to the other person. People can burn out their consiences by repeating the same sins- it gets easier. I do not recommend sex outside of marriage.
What I see here is that like anyone, you haven't forgotten your "first" and now you are seeing her again, but not in the same capacity as before. Sure, you'll feel jealous. But what I also see is that she's most possibly putting an emotional hook into you. Why else would she say she was sexually attracted to you?
To get past her, decide on your boundaries and do not move them. Limit your exposure to her. And find someone else to see.
2007-02-10 08:09:19 · answer #1 · answered by Jed 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, you got tagged out. There is a bonding that generally occurs between sexual partners. You got caught and either she didn't or professes to not have those feelings. That's why folks recommend no sex until there is some commitment. There isn't any way through it but to go through it and it takes as long as it takes.
2007-02-10 16:11:00 · answer #2 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not... Just take it easy.. I was like that same age too, my first and everything. It's difficult but u will get over her. When u find someone u love. She will always be in your heart but that's all she'll be...ok
2007-02-10 16:07:08 · answer #3 · answered by NicOOd 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dude you have to make a setup so her boyfriend can find a really hot girl and dump her get one of ur really hot friends and make HIM jealous so u can have her and he will bang ur really hot friend instead of ur little crush u have to ur old girlfriend
2007-02-10 16:06:23 · answer #4 · answered by Constipated Hippie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's dating someone else, so your options are pretty much set. You have to move on.
2007-02-10 16:06:17 · answer #5 · answered by martin h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋